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Thread: I'm too confused about a girl i like...

  1. #1

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    I'm too confused about a girl i like...

    So, I started going to a new veterinarian last year. She is very kind and affable to everyone.
    My dog had several several issues in a short period of time, and thus i spent a lot of time in the vet and me and her connected. We talked about movies, books etc, a lot more than just normal patient/doctor relationship. More than that, she started mentioning she was single every so often.
    After that period, we found out that my dog has joint issues that requires monitoring her weight and daily medication. I used this as an excuse to go there often and talk to her, and I planned my visits to hours I knew she would have more free time. In one of those times we were talking and she steered the conversation to girls and asked me, twice, if had a girlfriend, and while talking about moving out, she suggested that I should get a girlfriend that likes dogs and owns a house. She met all those conditions. I should have asked her out then...
    However, next time I saw her was in a park, with a man and his daughter. I got caught by surprise, we said hi to each other, made some small talk, and I left.
    Truth is, I lost most of my courage. Next time we talked she mentioned the guy as "the father of that girl", and told another story regarding her single life. again, she was single. After that I noticed that the guy was now living with her (she lives above the clinic and it's on my way to work, I pass there almost every day).
    I have decided l, now, should move on... I was too late. I stopped going there and went out of my way to avoid passing there to try and forget her. A couple of months passed.
    Recently I had a problem that made visit the clinic for a week. Everything is the same, she still very kind and making strange remarks, but the other guy is still around.
    I'm writing this because I'm going mad. It's clear I like her, and I believe she likes me too. How much, though, I do not know. It is obvious that it isn't easy for me to ask someone out and with this conditions is harder still.
    If you read this long sad story, thank you. What do you think? Was she waiting for me to ask her out? Is she dating the other guy?
    Why can't google answer these questions?

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Even if you have a crush, it's inappropriate to hang out at her office and try to ask her out. Outside of that it appears she has a social/romantic life outside the office. Let it go. She may think you're a nice guy but she's not romantically interested. Try finding other ways to meet women. Dog parks, groups, clubs volunteering, classes, courses, dating apps. Find a new vet if you become obsessed.
    Originally Posted by Tyntoor
    I used this as an excuse to go there often and talk to her, and I planned my visits to hours I knew she would have more free time. I saw her was in a park, with a man and his daughter. the guy was now living with her.

    I believe she likes me too.

  3. #3

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    Thank you... That is the answer I was looking for. I will move on.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    There are dog owner meetup groups. I can almost guarantee you'll meet women there.

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    omg stop being the cowardly lion. You know nothing of this fellow and you assume way too much. It could simply be a friend that is in need of a place to live because he is recently divorced. It's also possible there is more than one suite up there. TBH you should have asked her if she was interested in grabbing a coffee sometime at the beginning. It's all lost opportunity now, but please don't avoid her because you got disappointed. If she is providing great service/care for your doggie at least continue with that.

  7. #6
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    Maybe it's just me because I don't believe in gender roles, but a woman can ask a guy out too. And she never asked you out or suggested anything about catching up at all. Though there are still some women who firmly believe that it's a man's job to chase them. My best friend is like this and she just waits for guys to contact her or ask her out first.

    I must say though that normally a woman wouldn't mention if she's single so many times or ask if you have a girlfriend if she's not interested. Because this was meant to be only professional because she's your vet. In any case if that guy is her boyfriend now then your only option is to keep going to her as a vet and wait until she's single. Or to move on. But waiting until she's single could be pointless because she could be with that guy for many years for all you know.

  8. #7
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    If you want to know just ask. Simples

    Stop over thinking everything and just ask. She may say yes, she may say no. Until you get an answer either way everything else is just mental maturation and a waste of energy.


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