Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 2 of 6 FirstFirst 12345 ... LastLast
Results 11 to 20 of 57

Thread: Caught boyfriend leaving hearts under other womanís Instagram photo

  1. #11
    Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Posts
    45
    Thanks, I decided Iím going to break up with him. Clearly he still has the eyes for other woman and honestly I canít take another heart break.

  2. #12
    Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Posts
    45
    I just hope Iím not being overly dramatic. But at the same time seeing your guy posts hearts on another girls photo is not a good look. Iíd rather be single. Hey at least I tried

  3. #13
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Posts
    13,410
    I suggest slowing down next time.

    Don't be so anxious to get a boyfriend that you commit yourself to someone you've only known for a month. No way can you get a good gauge on a man's character in a little over 4 weeks.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Posts
    10,595
    Originally Posted by mayflower165
    Iím more concerned with him leaving the heart. Itís like he wanted her to know he finds her attractive. For what exactly? Is this pre cheating behavior? What if she found him attractive too.
    Serious question, but are you a boomer?

    I can't say I wouldn't find it juvenile, but it is common enough practice in this age where the softcore porn scene has kinda been commandeered by social media (especially Instagram) and other otherwise interactive media. A whole bunch of people leave "100," wide eye, fire, and heart emojis. I would sometimes go to a pic a friend liked specifically to go down the comment section. They're often comedy gold. Once saw some guy comment, "ur ass is fine as wine... ass wine."

    So yeah, I could see it a loss of respect thing imagining him sitting down and scrolling through lingerie pics and leaving emojis. And if that's a boundary you want to set for yourself, that's plenty fair. But he knows he's not going to get the time of day with an Instagram model simply for leaving a heart emoji. She definitely knows he's not. You should know he's not. I wouldn't call it some scheme or even a dangerous step. Just cringy behavior. In any case, if it's a deal breaker, leave him.

    And just to echo the rest, slow down in the future.

  5.  

  6. #15
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    16,956
    Gender
    Female
    Not to minimize your concerns, but apparently you barely know him after a period of one month dating. I think you're jumping the gun as to judging him which at this point is too soon, (imo).

    Of course it's your call, but I'd give this more time and more thought before calling the shots. JMO, and I'm sure many will disagree.

  7. #16
    Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Posts
    45
    It was a girl on his friends list that he left the heart emoji under, not some random Instagram model.

  8. #17
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    6,359
    The thing that would make me end it, you two have only started dating. He should be over the moon with his eyes only for you, feeling like he's found someone great.

    That feeling should last at least the first year. That's basically what the honeymoon stage is all about.

    This guy's not even a month into it and is drooling over another girl. That's just crass.

  9. #18
    Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Posts
    45
    I told him I wanted to end things with him. He didnít even put up a fight for me. Ok I guess I made the right choice

  10. #19
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared
    Age
    53
    Posts
    37,442
    Gender
    Female
    I would have done that in person for personal integrity.

  11. #20
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Posts
    4,242
    Gender
    Male
    Originally Posted by mayflower165
    I just hope Iím not being overly dramatic. But at the same time seeing your guy posts hearts on another girls photo is not a good look. Iíd rather be single. Hey at least I tried
    I think you're being both a bit dramatic and totally reasonable. To explain:

    The "dramatic" part is feeling like this is something to "confront," or something you "caught" him doing, and spinning a narrative in which a heart emoji leads to a DM with an IG lingerie thirst trap that leads to an affair. Not happening, unless your boyfriend is, I don't know, Justin Bieber.

    The "reasonable" part is not wanting to be in a committed relationship with a grown man who acts like teenager. Because that's all this is, a dude whose social media activity mirrors a juvenile nature. It's kind of the difference between a guy who notices a hot woman on the streetói.e. all guys, just like all women will notice a devilishly handsome manóand a guy who who needs to go "Whoa! You are SO HOT!" and see what kind of reaction he can stir. Yawn.

    Just because she is on his friends list does not mean they are friends. Her profile is publicóyou found itóso I could easily add her to my friends list if, you know, I wanted my IG feed to be filled with T&A. I could heart that photo right now, no? But I don't feel like it, and that has nothing to do with the fact that I have a girlfriend. I like T&A just fineóI am a humanóbut it's not a consuming hobby. You won't find it on my social feed, even at my most single.

    Plenty of people, men and women, do have such feeds, such hobbies: sweaty abs, sweaty butts. It's a thing, and all in all I think you can roughly imagine who has such feeds without even seeing their actual feeds. People follow celebrities as well, leave hearts on their feeds. They don't know the celebrities, but leaving the heart makes them feel momentarily connected to them, a sweet little illusion that goes down like Skittle.

    This is that, high school stuff.

    In your shoes? I'd be annoyingly amused. I don't measure my girlfriend too much by her IG usage, but I do relate to it, find vague comfort in it. It's heavy on things that interest me too. If I'd "caught" her leaving hearts on two year old photos of sweaty dudes a month into thingsówell, I think I'd have just lost a fair bit of attraction to her since part of what I find attractive about people is imagining how they spend their time and energy when they're not spending it on me.

    So I'd look at it more through that lens: Is this too cringy for you? If so, all good. That's what the early days are all about, seeing if someone makes us feel like smile emoji or a cringe emoji.

Page 2 of 6 FirstFirst 12345 ... LastLast

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •