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Thread: The lives of toxic / unfaithful / narcissistic people

  1. #21
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    The Secret says to wish your enemies well and prayer for them. When you wish your enemies well and wish good for them, good things will come back to you. So don't waste you time thinking ill of this person, wish them well. And remember that the best revenge is living well.

  2. #22
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by DaisyMayPorter
    The Secret says to wish your enemies well and prayer for them. When you wish your enemies well and wish good for them, good things will come back to you. So don't waste you time thinking ill of this person, wish them well. And remember that the best revenge is living well.
    I don't know what The Secret is, but I like this idea. I'd just add that I think the best revenge is purging the whole idea of revenge from one's being. One need only to look at the history of mankind to learn that nothing good has ever come from anyone seeking revenge, in any manner. It is, roughly, the foundation of emotional toxicity.

  3. #23
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    People are who they are. They don't change unless they have enough pain to make them want to change, and in most cases, that doesn't happen. So take them as they are, or don't. You have freedom of choice. But as the old saying goes, resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.

  4. #24
    Platinum Member maew's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    Bluecastle, thank you.

    It is pretty self centered to think "the universe" is obligated to punish someone for hurting us. That's making ourselves the center of the universe, which is actually kind of ridiculous.

    Living our best lives while being kind to others and forgiving ourselves for mistakes and bad choices is the way to be IMO. And not worrying about what others are getting that we think they don't deserve.
    Thank you for saying exactly what I was thinking.

    Blaming someone for how you feel, hanging on to resentment for years, and hoping they will be "punished" by the universe is just as toxic as any other behavior.... but at least that's one you can do something about.

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  6. #25
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    My ex, who was very abusive, and still is verbally abusive and manipulative, is constantly harassing me (we have a daughter together). I learned to block his number, except when itís time for him to call my daughter. I donít ever wish bad of him, no matter how much he harasses me.

    The only thing I wish for is, I make a wish to the universe that he becomes a better person or gets out of my and my daughterís lives and leaves us alone. Anyway, a few weeks ago, he asked to borrow my car, to which I said no, and he kept saying to me over and over that karma was going to get me, Iím such a bad person and mother, blah blah. (All because I wouldnít let him use my car.) That night, he had a heart attack and almost died. The universe works in strange ways. Heís still been a jerk mind you, the last few weeks. But I still donít wish him ill.

  7. #26
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    I don't pray for my enemies nor wish them well. I simply leave them permanently. It's "Adios!" I take the more passive aggressive approach and simply cut them off. I don't bother them and I see to it that they sure as heck will not bother me either!

    If I must cross paths with them occasionally, I always maintain a guarded, distrustful yet polite safe distance forever.

    In the meantime, I live well and create my own happiness with people who sincerely love and respect me whether it's my immediate family, treasured long time friends, some relatives and in-laws. Other times, I savor my alone time.

    Strike a healthy balance in your life and stop obsessing over people who are worthless.

  8. #27
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    Narcassists never know they are narcassists, so everything they do looks perfect on the outside.

    Cheaters always get their come uppings whether in forms of disease, death, or loss of something. May not be right away, but it happens.

    The ex that brought me on enotalone. He got married 2 years after I did, and they divorced in less than 6 months. He lost his job, and now living in the other side of the country with a much more less up the totem pole job, and none of the same friends. Same with another two exes who didn't treat me well divorced.

    The common denominator though was me, and taking time off to invest in me, and fix my picker!!!

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