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Thread: Told him I liked him and he said he is not ready for commitment or relationships

  1. #21
    Platinum Member
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    Originally Posted by Kriyah
    I'm not able to stop obsessing over him. Maybe coz it's just been 2 days now.
    Be patient with yourself. 2 days is nothing.

    You will one day feel better again, but it will take time. You're already moving in the right direction by going no contact.

  2. #22
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    If someone ditched me right before a movie and never asked me out again, that's all I would need to know about any potential with the guy. Time to move your focus onward. He's the guy of your fantasies, but in reality, this is not the guy for you.

    Head high, and take baby steps to move ahead.

  3. #23
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    OP, why would you ask someone what their plans were on Christmas day and New Yearís Eve?
    What did you do those days and if he had responded with meeting you on either of those days , who would you have ditched to see him??

    Who says Dec 25th and 31st??

    Iím assuming this is a troll !

  4. #24
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    I think English is not her native language. Just from the sentence structure and phrasing, I get that she's translating in her mind before writing.

    And I could be wrong, but that's my presumption.

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  6. #25
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    There are aspects to a crush like this that are harder than moving on from an encounter that you have had the chance to actually explore. Go easy on yourself and let yourself process the pain. You spent a lot of time building up something that was never going to happen in your mind. Since it is all in your mind, it will take some time to dismantle that imaginary foundation that has been shaken. The key thing is that it was imaginary. You never really found out if you like him or not because it was mostly about the possibility - and in fact his interactions with you have been pretty lame! He's a jerk, not a catch. Even if you don't have romantic feelings for someone, it is still inconsiderate to plan something and then break it off on the day you were supposed to get together.

    I do wonder how much you followed up on some of these almost-meetings though, and how clear the plans made were. Like, did you plan to see the movie in the morning? Afternoon? Evening? Or was it very loose, to where he may have not picked up that you were that serious about it. When you get the next crush, you might try to be a little more direct. Being direct earlier can get you an answer about whether or not there is potential sooner, and save you a lot of heartache when you pine and wonder.

    But for now, just go easy on yourself. Find other things to focus on. When you have thoughts about your crush, let yourself feel the bad emotion, but remind yourself of the truth. He just wasn't into you, and wasn't really the catch you were hoping for either. But you have values. Values that would be worth sharing with someone who does care - and is worth it.

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