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Shall I remove him from my life when I'm never going to meet him again?


Caty

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I met a guy who lives in a different city and we met when he was on work trip, and we hit it off very well. He was supposed to come back the following week. We met and it went very well. When we said goodbye, he said that he's coming back in March, but if I want I can visit him before he comes back but we can talk about it. The next week (last week), I asked him and he said that he have to check his calendar the next day which was fine. I didn't hear anything from him then he sends me selfie of himself. Later I sent a snap to see if he was going to give me the dates. He just replied with emojis, so I asked if he had checked the calander. He gave me the dates and the only weekend I could was the weekend that he wasn't sure but he would get back to me. He didn't get back to me if he could that weekend. Whenever I would try to start a conversation, he would not reply, send me a one word answer or just reply with emojis. I felt that he didn't want to get to know me but only replying to be kind. On Friday I sent a messag asking if he would like to get to know more because I didn't feel like that. He opened the message right away but didn't reply to me in four hours but I saw that he was active. I was already having a bad day, so I sent him a message saying that I got my answer and good luck (I know that I might have overreacted). He got angry and wrote that if it's how I feel that way there is nothing to do about it. I sent him that good luck and I hope that he finds what is looking for.

 

One hour later, he sends me tons of messages on messenger. We talk and agreed to have a phone conversation on Sunday. We agreed to put the argument behind us and he was going to check if he was available that weekend. However, he said that he doesn't know what he wants during the conversation. I added him back on Snapchat and Facebook. He hasn't sent me one snap since I added him back. He told me that he couldn't that weekend. I said that it was fine. He replied to one of my snapchat stories today which was of my dog. He really wants to meet my dog 🤷♀️ I sent him a snap which waited an hour to open and he didn't reply and I can see that he's active.

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no. . and no.

 

If someone is interested, you will know it. This guy certainly is not. He's interested in the entertainment, that's all.

My guess is he's hedging his bets and he has a girlfriend or a wife.

 

Between now and March he'll take advantage of your attention and when the date draws near, expect more of the same.

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no. . and no.

 

If someone is interested, you will know it. This guy certainly is not. He's interested in the entertainment, that's all.

My guess is he's hedging his bets and he has a girlfriend or a wife.

 

Between now and March he'll take advantage of your attention and when the date draws near, expect more of the same.

 

Should I just delete him even though I've done it once before?

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I have blocked him so he can't get in touch with me because last time he sent me tons of messages accusing me of causing drama. Now he knows I don't want any messages from him. I also blocked his number, so he can't call me. F*** him..

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I have blocked him so he can't get in touch with me because last time he sent me tons of messages accusing me of causing drama. Now he knows I don't want any messages from him. I also blocked his number, so he can't call me. F*** him..

 

When someone deflects blame and tries to make you feel like you are the problem when you set a boundary, it's typically a clear sign they are guilty of something and don't want to take any responsibility.

 

Had he really cared, he would have empathy for how you felt regarding his actions and he'd want to talk to you about it and work together to make it better.

 

Instead, he blamed you.

Google - projection.

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When someone deflects blame and tries to make you feel like you are the problem when you set a boundary, it's typically a clear sign they are guilty of something and don't want to take any responsibility.

 

Had he really cared, he would have empathy for how you felt regarding his actions and he'd want to talk to you about it and work together to make it better.

 

Instead, he blamed you.

Google - projection.

 

He wanted to put the argument behind us but now he is ignoring me. When he said that he couldn't that weekend. I just wrote that it was fine with a smiley. If he actually cared then he would had said that we can meet in March but he didn't reply anything. At least, now he know that I don't want anything to do with him and that I didn't do this for attention.

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He wanted to put the argument behind us but now he is ignoring me. When he said that he couldn't that weekend. I just wrote that it was fine with a smiley. If he actually cared then he would had said that we can meet in March but he didn't reply anything. At least, now he know that I don't want anything to do with him and that I didn't do this for attention.

 

The guy just continued behaving the way that caused the argument in the first place, so what would be the point of discussion?

 

Nobody ever tells us who they are, they show us. You paid attention and saw that this guy is not right for you, and you shut him down. Good job!

 

Head high.

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Sorry to hear this. He may have a gf/wife in his hometown so don't be someone's bed and breakfast with benefits. Get on some quality dating apps and start messaging and meeting local guys.

I met a guy who lives in a different city and we met when he was on work trip, and we hit it off very well.He really wants to meet my dog 🤷
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Sorry to hear this. He may have a gf/wife in his hometown so don't be someone's bed and breakfast with benefits. Get on some quality dating apps and start messaging and meeting local guys.

 

Nah, I don't think he had a gf or wife. Just because he acted like this doesn't mean that he had gf or a wife 😅. He was just childish and didn't know what he wanted. We both didn't know how our profiles showed up in the card deck on tinder. I don't mind dating guys who live in a different city because my country isn't big. Don't assume that everyone who post here live in the US. Taking a plane to the other siden of the country, takes only 2 hours and taking the bus from my city (the capital) to the west coast takes only 7 hours with a car. But, if you read what I wrote, I blocked him.

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You met on Tinder? Why not try for local guys? Are there other high quality apps you can use in your country? What is wrong with dating local guys you can date on a regular basis?

We both didn't know how our profiles showed up in the card deck on tinder. I don't mind dating guys who live in a different city because my country isn't big.
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You met on Tinder? Why not try for local guys? Are there other high quality apps you can use in your country? What is wrong with dating local guys you can date on a regular basis?

 

As I said, it was not like I was aming at matching with a guy who lives in another city. I have the distance set on 16 km. We both were wondering how we ended up matching. Honsetly, I didn't ask for advice on how to meet guys nor did I ask if I only should date local guys. Its also my choice if I awant to try dating guys that live a bit further away. My question was if I should remove him. I was a bit torn because I've deleted him once before and he accused me of causing drama and overreacting. Please, stick to the question.

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Yes, blocking/unblocking is drama and game playing. Delete permanently and move forward.

 

What? I only deleted him the first time and he sent me tons on messages. Now I blocked him and I haven't unblocked him because I don't want him to message me ever again. You need to learn how to read.

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