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Thread: Am I too jealous?

  1. #11
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by SherrySher
    You're going to have a realize that this is an issue with your BOYFRIEND not this girl. This girl can behave however she wants to. She can be flirty, she can show loads of bikini pictures. That's her right to. You as another female don't have to be hating on her for it.

    The problem comes in when your boyfriend enjoys it, accepts her and loves to spend time with her. That's not her fault, this is who your boyfriend is and what HE keeps choosing.
    Make no mistake about it, if this girl were to all of a sudden disappear, some other girl who is similar would eventually come along, and he would like her too.

    This is something in him. He wants to befriend other women. He wants to spend time with them. He enjoys their company and their pictures, etc.
    Agreed. Don't make this a competition between you and this girl. Especially when the "prize" is a guy who isn't interested in your feelings on the matter. He likes the attention too much to enforce boundaries.

    Originally Posted by Karub
    She used to join our games which we were enjoying alone even though none of us invited her. I am an introvert type and like to have space with my boyfriend. I don't like the way that friend intrudes our personal space. But he said I am being too dramatic and too jealous etc. even though I told him several times, it is not that I don't trust him, I don't like the constant close being of her.
    Honestly, I don't blame you. I wouldn't like having another girl always around. But I would draw the line. And if he wasn't amenable to that, I would leave. The end.

    It's why I'm in a good relationship now: I didn't waste time trying to reason with guys like him.

    Originally Posted by Karub
    PS: He also keeps the friendship with his ex girlfriend who called me "stupid snowflake" because I shared my dislike about a popular tv show. He told me this is an issue between me and her, he won't just give up on the friendship with her, but he will try to keep the contact level low. The friendship itself bothered me enough, but when the insult was thrown into the room, I could even understand less why he wants to be friends with her.
    It's another red flag. If a guy's friends are comfortable insulting his girlfriend, it's obvious that girlfriends score low on the totem pole in that guy's life.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    He likes the attention too much to enforce boundaries.
    100%.

    Hey, I know where you're coming from, Karub. I used to blame the girl too if she was behaving badly and he enjoyed it. That was in my younger years.
    I now know that this is not about other women. This is if the guy you want to be with is a decent fellow and won't like girls like that and respects your feelings, as his girlfriend.

    If he keeps you waiting and runs to this other girl, that's on him. He's not a nice guy and he treats you badly.

    Start seeing who is the real problem here and then maybe ask yourself if you deserve a better boyfriend and not this guy.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    I didn't waste time trying to reason with guys like him.
    So, so true. These types of guys are a waste of your time and your emotions.

    All you can honestly do is move on. He won't change.

  4. #14
    Karub's Avatar
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    Thanks for the replies and sorry about the long block. I was typing from my phone. I will try to talk to him about this matter again though
    he seems pretty annoyed about me mentioning it again.

  5.  

  6. #15
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    He's annoyed because he doesn't want to change. He likes behaving how he does. He's not going to change.

    Honestly Karub, with guys like this, all you can do is move on. He is going to teach you heartache and frustration.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    You need to get out of the house away from the screen and gaming and meet real life people locally. You are hiding from life and that is exacerbating this issue of jealousy.

  8. #17
    Platinum Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    As some others have said, LDR's can be problematic. Most don't work out.

  9. #18
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    I can't imagine that having a relationship with your phone, laptop and gaming console is more rewarding than seeing someone in person regularly and being able to hold their hand, kiss, hug, go out places together, cuddle together watching a movie...

    Why do you prefer this electronic version of a relationship? Because this electronic version is proving very stressful, isn't it? I don't see the advantage unless you're fearful of in-person interactions.

  10. #19
    Platinum Member maew's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by SherrySher
    He's annoyed because he doesn't want to change. He likes behaving how he does. He's not going to change.

    Honestly Karub, with guys like this, all you can do is move on. He is going to teach you heartache and frustration.
    This.

    You have already talked to him about it and he doesn't want to change the behavior.... and to be honest, you haven't changed your behavior either so why should he?

    Relationships are a two way street.

    Stop relying so much on a person you barely know... that really only exists online... go out and live your life, meet new people, do whatever you need to do to feel more fulfilled.

  11. #20
    Platinum Member Andrina's Avatar
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    Hmm. Two women willing to spend their hard earned money on flying to visit him? Sounds like he knows how to play more than video games.

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