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Thread: He deleted me from his social media accounts

  1. #11
    Hey Hollyj,

    Hell yeah! When I told him that we barely know each other, he said that 2 months are enough to have an idea about what person I am and what person he is ..

    It was a huge red flag indeed.. I had some doubts from the beginning but I wanted to wait and observe him as I was sure that sooner, or later he will reveal his true face :) .

    For addressing my trust issues, I can not say too much about it.. Since my last relationship, I was never put in a situation where I have to address them actually.. It will be a challenge though.. You know being love bombed for many months and then ghosted in one night is not easy at all .. but it does not mean that it is not possible .. It is probably a matter of time when I will meet the 'right' perso.

  2. #12
    Hello reinventmyself,

    Thank you for taking the time to read and write me your thoughts :).

    So to start with, honestly I don't like to think that I am attracting these people into my life.
    I mean these were two wrong persons out of many right persons that I met ..
    Each person we met is either a lesson or a blessing..
    So even meeting the wrong people has a reason.. We learn from them,or from the pain they cause to us.. and maybe that s why I 'attracted' them, to learn something new.
    For instance, I am grateful for my ex boyfriend because thanks to him I learned about love bombing and how to react when someone is ghosting you etc..

    While for this guy, I honestly did not think that he was love bombing me because he had his own manners of telling me that he wants me so much, but then if I refuse him, that s fine, his life won't stop and mine neither and we will meet other people in the future etc..
    He showed me that he has an active life and he would not talk to me when for instance he s reading a book.. These behaviors made me think that he is a normal person and he is showing me that I am important but not a priority ( which is normal because I don t want him to treat me as a priority and we did not even start a relationship.. Coz if this happened,then I would have doubts.. you know what I mean ? ) and I was behaving the same.. So I thought he has a balanced personality and life..
    Previously when I was love bombed by my ex, he used to send me flowers to my workplace, and cook me my favorite food and buying me gifts , coming to my home at 3am just to hear my voice etc. .SO you see the difference that I have in my mind ?

    For you telling me that I was asking him to adjust his pace to mine, yes probably I shouldn't even ask for such thing. Though back then, my aim is to to be more ' communicative' rather than convincing him to do something for me...

    With that being said, what I did not like about my reaction to his behavior is that at the end after we stopped talking and he deleted me, I started to blame myself for being too ' difficult', which is deep down, I know I was not really.. I am working more to get over this emotional rollercoaster :)

    Thank you so much again .
    Peace and Love

  3. #13
    I think u managed to read them right ? :)

  4. #14
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    That's the thing, you shouldn't have "scars". You mention the past relationship over and over and over and how alone you feel in your new country. So it seems to be haunting you. As far this this guy, it's just a fling. Strive to meet quality people including quality men to date. Do not get wrapped up in cyber/texting romances. If you are lonely or homesick visit home, make more friends, etc. But to not grab and cling on to anyone who simply offers a lot of texting.
    Originally Posted by freespirit15
    the 'scars' are always here..

  5.  

  6. #15
    Hello Tinydance,

    Thank you so much for your reply :) .

    Exactly, wanting to rush things is not normal behavior especially for guys.. In relationships, guys tend to take things slowly and not the opposite.
    But he was a smooth talker so he convinced me that his aim was not rushing things rather than just give it a shot and try our chance and if it does not work that is completely fine..
    He also kept telling me that he does not want me to be crazy about him from now but just do small steps,which also count for him ( for eg, texting him before he does, asking him to meet etc ) ..
    At some point this seemed logical to me and I was not against it if he will give me the time I needed.. These things should be done by a person's own will not because someone else asked you or forced you to do them.. especially that we were not even in a relationship to blame me for not calling you or making plans with you..
    As u said, he was either desperate, or he wanted just some booty call nights or probably both :)

  7. #16
    Hey Boltnrun,

    Thank you for your reply :) .

    Probably yes.. He didn't like the fact that I refused to give in that quick,that s being 'coward' for him. lol

    Definitely not a big loss, not even a small one :) Life goes on xoxo

  8. #17
    Hey MissCanuck,

    I am sorry I didn't get you well ?

  9. #18
    Hey Misscanuck,

    Now I got you and it was already done by the moderator of the forum :)

  10. #19
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    Originally Posted by freespirit15
    Hey Hollyj,

    Hell yeah! When I told him that we barely know each other, he said that 2 months are enough to have an idea about what person I am and what person he is ..

    It was a huge red flag indeed.. I had some doubts from the beginning but I wanted to wait and observe him as I was sure that sooner, or later he will reveal his true face :) .

    For addressing my trust issues, I can not say too much about it.. Since my last relationship, I was never put in a situation where I have to address them actually.. It will be a challenge though.. You know being love bombed for many months and then ghosted in one night is not easy at all .. but it does not mean that it is not possible .. It is probably a matter of time when I will meet the 'right' perso.
    In the future, ditch people who love bomb, future fake and relationship accelerate. This is not normal. You need to shut it down on the first date, by ceasing contact, not observing.

  11. #20
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    How long did you date love bomb guy?

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