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i like someone but my heart doesn’t skip a beat


idunnoohh

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There’s this guy i like, i find his personality very unique and he makes me happy. His looks don’t matter that much to me, he’s attractive and he’s a very nice guy. I’ve never really loved anyone in my life. Growing up i’ve never had a lot of verbal or physical affection, but whenever he shows it, it makes me feel nice. Though everyone who has liked a person say that they feel butterflies in their stomach or their heart skips a beat or they feel really crazy and super happy when they’re around. I don’t feel that. I want to love him and make him feel nice too. He said he loves me and that i make him feel very special. But i don’t know what to do. I want to learn to love him but i’m scared. I don’t understand by how people say they feel super ecstatic when their crush is around. Again, i don’t feel anything and it makes me feel bad. It makes me feel like i’m not normal and i want to know what’s wrong with me. I just want to know what to do and why i feel like this. Does anyone know anything ?

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How old is he ? Where do you know him from? You do not have to have sex with any guy who tells you they love you. Dating is not like Disney movies with rainbows unicorns and butterflies. Real life dating is fun and exciting but should not be making you nervous or wondering how to "make him feel special". Keep in mind you can get STDs from oral sex. If this guy is pushy, tell a trusted adult about it.

He said he loves me and that i make him feel very special.It makes me feel like i’m not normal and i want to know what’s wrong with me.
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i’m only 17

 

^^^ answers part of your question about love. Love is still a new emotion for you especially since you have missed verbal and physical affection in the past.

 

Don't compare yourself to others, we all grow at different rates.

 

Just be careful if you get intimate (protection)...and know that most boys aren't capable of "true love" until much much later in life and will say anything to make out with you.

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There will be plenty of times that you feel those butterflies and other times not. Often times that high you are looking for tends to blind us from things we should otherwise be looking out for. There is something to be said about starting out as friends and letting things build from there.

 

But at 17 there is no rush, so don't pressure yourself. You are perfectly normal. Don't go down that road.

 

If you aren't feeling it right now there is nothing wrong with just being his friend in the meantime. If he's not ok with waiting, then he's not the right guy to begin with.

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If he makes you happy, that's wonderful!

The best relationship is when you genuinely like someone, always look forward to spending time wth them, and find them attractive, and they respect you, and also enjoy you as a person, not just as someone they are attracted to. Sometime the strongest butterflies happen between two people who only have sexual attraction.

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To be honest it sounds to me like you like him as a friend only. Are you physically attracted to him? Like, do you want to kiss him? I'm not saying to have sex but do you find him cute/hot? If you only like his personality but not attracted to him then I'd say it's just friendship on your part. It's OK not to feel butterflies about every single guy, it's totally normal. We only feel sparks with some people and not others. That's what makes love special.

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To be honest it sounds to me like you like him as a friend only. Are you physically attracted to him? Like, do you want to kiss him? I'm not saying to have sex but do you find him cute/hot? If you only like his personality but not attracted to him then I'd say it's just friendship on your part. It's OK not to feel butterflies about every single guy, it's totally normal. We only feel sparks with some people and not others. That's what makes love special.

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When i was that age, well, i didn't date yet at that age, but i wasn't sexually active -- so if there was a guy i liked, i was drawn to talking to him and wasn't so much about "desiring him" as a more mature woman would... She did say she DOES like him, and really, relationships that start like this have a better foundation.

 

Growing up i’ve never had a lot of verbal or physical affection, but whenever he shows it, it makes me feel nice. Though everyone who has liked a person say that they feel butterflies in their stomach or their heart skips a beat or they feel really crazy and super happy when they’re around.

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There’s this guy i like, i find his personality very unique and he makes me happy. His looks don’t matter that much to me, he’s attractive and he’s a very nice guy. I’ve never really loved anyone in my life. Growing up i’ve never had a lot of verbal or physical affection, but whenever he shows it, it makes me feel nice. Though everyone who has liked a person say that they feel butterflies in their stomach or their heart skips a beat or they feel really crazy and super happy when they’re around. I don’t feel that. I want to love him and make him feel nice too. He said he loves me and that i make him feel very special. But i don’t know what to do. I want to learn to love him but i’m scared. I don’t understand by how people say they feel super ecstatic when their crush is around. Again, i don’t feel anything and it makes me feel bad. It makes me feel like i’m not normal and i want to know what’s wrong with me. I just want to know what to do and why i feel like this. Does anyone know anything ?

 

I think what everyone has written on here is fantastic advice.

Trust the folks on this forum even if it seems foreign to you right now.

You CAN feel butterflies etc in your stomach when you meet someone you initially have a lot of infatuation for - but that can die down once you get to know them.

I think, with time, and experience, you will learn what feels right for you. You will make mistakes - and that's okay. It's all part of this wonderful process call life.

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