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Thread: Unusual divorce

  1. #21
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    A bit broken yeah unfortunately I would either have to make a whole bunch of money or hardly any for us to have lived comfortably. I did however invest a lot in our "marriage ". I bought a home with an open floor plan, and completely renovated it to make it fully accessible stuff a roll in shower, ramps, 36" wide doors all over the house etc. To give an even more widened perspective on where our marriage was til the end, she embraced the idea of me finding someone to be intimate with because well of the progression of her disease. I never once cheated on her though, even with her blessings. I'm not sure where people are getting where I ever treated her like a child? As said before we live in south Texas, and there is an epidemic of human trafficking.. I agree on me feeling a little paranoid and protective of her. As I feel anyone would given the amount of care that she needs. People can continue to make assumptions and write whatever false narrative they want about me if it makes them feel better about themselves. I think the toxic comments speak more on to the people that write them and really have no effect on me at all (the negative ones). Its funny because my ex and I are more open with each other as I said before and have become better friends. Other than the tracking detail she knows about pretty much everything else to which she doesn't support either, but doesn't feel angered or hurt by it. She's dating and we're very much separated, that was never the issue just. I just wanted to post about my back story a bit in the original post.

  2. #22
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    Thanks again everyone who shared their genuine concerns.

  3. #23
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    I actually reply to a very large amount of people on here. I definitely don't comment only on your posts. I've been on these boards for six years and I'm a regular. I am not trying to be rude but I am allowed to express my opinions. I'm not a paid therapist but just a lay person who is on these boards and I always speak with honesty. To be really honest I think that you are fretting over your ex-wife too much because you're not together anymore. I totally understand that you have so much history with her and you do sound like a kind person who genuinely cares. You have been very selfless a lot of your life. Your wife was lucky to have you because you really went out of your way to accommodate her and you supported her so much.

    However she is not intellectually disabled and she is a grown woman. Now that you're not together, she has to lean on other people. Her family, paid carers, friends and the new person she's dating. How do you think it's going to look to her new partner and your new partner if you continue to act like you and your wife are still in a relationship? You don't always have to be someone's carer and always put others before yourself. Your marriage is over and now you can live your own life. It's the same with any relationship, when it's over you need to move on.

    And I'm sorry if you think that thinking it's wrong to secretly install a tracker on yoir wife's phone speaks badly of my character and means I'm toxic. What you wanted to do is just plain wrong and weird. I don't think it makes me a toxic person to think those things about that concept. It just sounds to me like you want to hear certain things from people and when you don't hear those things, you get annoyed.

  4. #24
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    I actually have 1730 posts here and they are like 95% commenting on other people's posts. I hardly ever post anything myself. So as you can see I reply to people a lot and not only to you.

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  6. #25
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    A woman who uses a wheelchair and has muscular dystrophy would not be someone human traffickers would be eager to abduct. They don't want someone who is constantly dependent upon medical care. They want women, and also children and young men for sex trafficking, or lure with the promise of work. A woman who is more able bodied is more easily hidden in plain site. Her appearance could be changed - hair, clothes and she could act like she was "supposed" to be with her trafficker out of fear. A woman with an obvious disability would be way more memorable (as would an abnormally tall woman, for example), to an eyewitness. And people who are trafficked half the time are "groomed" - they are befriended by their trafficker in some way - they are not just snatched.

    I am not saying its not possible, but i am trying to say your fears while not similar to be eaten by a shark in the middle of a corn field, its kinda not the biggest thing to be worried about.

  7. #26
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    Ok tiny dancer I understand where you're coming from. But just like you have a right to express your opinions, I have the right to defend myself. I think the problem with your observations is that you assume character and base judgment off of what brief postings you read off of. If you have questions I'd be more than happy to answer them for you. But to call me a liar and a stalker seems a bit harsh. For the record as stated in this very post, the device wasn't meant to be installed in her phone but rather the van which we own. I was questioning my fear for her safety rather than wanting to know her every whereabouts. She also is not dating one exclusive person, but has just started the process of finding a new partner or friend. If I am already aware of that, I have no reason to pry. Most gps navigation systems for automobiles have these features set to be programmed into cell phones. I don't see the big deal in installing a device similar. She however shares the sentiments of me being paranoid, and would oppose the idea. Though she is of sound mind, she does require a tremendous amount of care. Because of the Friedrichs ataxia she suffers from muscle spasms, impaired speech, vision and hearing. She suffers from hypertrophic cardiomyopathy and scoliosis. She is supposed to wear a life alert necklace that has a built in gps, cellular phone service, and a fall alert installed but because of vanity, never wears it. She has a great support system put in place mostly because I helped her by the way, and the only family she has in south texas is her two elderly parents who have health issues of their own.
    Last edited by Gmx49; 01-09-2020 at 02:07 AM.

  8. #27
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    A bit broken I have come to terms with the fact that I am a paranoid person. To my defense however, my ex wife is a very beautiful woman. She has modeled for various companies and for the local MDA. She's even been on television for different MDA events. Hell she's even been on the cover of the local newspaper before. Unfortunately she has experienced sexual harassment/abuse in the past before we met. And here in Texas (especially the south) we are amongst the worst states with an epidemic of human trafficking cases that seem to happen or almost happen weekly. I don't know the thought process or strategies of an evil person such as a trafficker, but I do however own several guns and I am always ready to defend the ones I love.

  9. #28
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    It seems like you really love this woman. So why are you splitting up?

    I hope it's not because you think you're in love with that stripper. Because you know that will go nowhere and then what? Regret for tossing away the relationship you already have?

  10. #29
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    Originally Posted by Gmx49
    A bit broken I have come to terms with the fact that I am a paranoid person. To my defense however, my ex wife is a very beautiful woman. She has modeled for various companies and for the local MDA. She's even been on television for different MDA events. Hell she's even been on the cover of the local newspaper before. Unfortunately she has experienced sexual harassment/abuse in the past before we met. And here in Texas (especially the south) we are amongst the worst states with an epidemic of human trafficking cases that seem to happen or almost happen weekly. I don't know the thought process or strategies of an evil person such as a trafficker, but I do however own several guns and I am always ready to defend the ones I love.
    People do not get targeted because they are stunning. They are targeted due to opportunity and vulnerability (thought youth makes a difference). They avoid people that are perceived to need constant medical care because they would be on the radar if they showed up at a clinic or hospital where they would be identified and adults that would have to be carried or slow down their movements. That's why elderly people are typically not trafficked.

    I think by telling yourself that you need to protect her, you are saying she is too naive to make her own choices.

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