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Thread: My Wife Emotional Relation with another Men; What would help?

  1. #21
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    And what does his wife say about all of this?

  2. #22
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    It sounds more like you are overdoing it with his wife, more like you're the one having the "emotional affair".. Listen to the counselor. Leave her alone. It would be best for both of you to stay out of their marriage.
    Originally Posted by canadien
    Councelor told me not to talk to his wife

  3. #23
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    It sounds more like you are overdoing it with his wife, more like you're the one having the "emotional affair".. Listen to the counselor. Leave her alone. It would be best for both of you to stay out of their marriage.
    I have never talked to his wife; she called me before as they were out talking and my wife did not pick up the phone. His wife went through his call records and text messages to uncover.

    They started using snapchat so nothing is saved for her to see. I am just wondering who I can talk to as I feel very vulnerable at this time and no one to share to.

  4. #24
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    The counselor and your wife are the people you need to be honest and open with. You are not taking the counselor's advice. Why did you decide to go to couples therapy? Were there problems before this? How does your wife feel about the therapy? She seems quite angry with you and extremely unhappy in the marriage.
    Originally Posted by canadien
    I am just wondering who I can talk to as I feel very vulnerable at this time and no one to share to.

  5.  

  6. #25
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    You can always talk here.

    But yes, they are definitely having an affair.

  7. #26
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    I don't feel the counsellor has your best interest at heart, I can see why you're not comfortable talking to him/her.
    I have never in my life heard of a counsellor condoning the type of behavior your wife is displaying.

    Yes, your wife does not sound happy but no way does that EVER give her the right to go to another man!!

  8. #27
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    The counselor and your wife are the people you need to be honest and open with. You are not taking the counselor's advice. Why did you decide to go to couples therapy? Were there problems before this? How does your wife feel about the therapy? She seems quite angry with you and extremely unhappy in the marriage.
    There was another friend from college before this guy who my wife had strong connection with; this married guy simply replaced him and I unravel all this recently as i just wanted my wife to be happy so i joined doing various activities I never though that getting this guys involved was pulling her away from me.
    This new guy has higher job position and family, she says he is superior to last guy who was single and not as well settled.

    She keeps comparing me to him and see him as ideal mate and tells me lots of faults of mine and how she wasted 10 years of her life.

    She had more guys pursuing her at different times that she says refused and chose me, she says I should be thankful for that.

    This Third Person already has this kind of reputation so my mom and my brother told me to keep distance from him; everybody said I was playing with fire but I still went ahead for various activities as that is what my wife likes to spend time wife.
    She has detached from all her friends and extended family; she would not even go to another city with me without him; She is happy as long as he is involved in the activity and after the fact she will make me a scapegoat and say that I decided to include him.

    His wife and everybody knows how he is so my wife is using me as a backup witness to protect themselves against any negative talk as everybody just think that Its part of family activity.
    Last edited by canadien; 01-04-2020 at 01:33 PM.

  9. #28
    Platinum Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    She should not be meeting this man alone - that's cheating. Start going with her again, or she has to stop seeing him or you will leave.

  10. #29
    Silver Member Spawn's Avatar
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    Its time to move on from this, she does not respect you or the relationship.Take a legal opinion and start the process
    Councillor is useless need a change there too.

  11. #30
    Platinum Member Andrina's Avatar
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    Where is the baby in all of this? I was exhausted when my children were 1, and wouldn't be having time to "help" anyone. That's another area you should be concerned about, if your child is being neglected and confused by her spending time with another man. Your wife can see the seriousness of the matter with the counseling sessions and trying to cover up her activities with the extended family. I can't see her changing, so you're the one who will have to make major changes in life for your own good. See a lawyer to get advice about what a divorce would entail in your situation.

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