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Thread: Her love letters weren't hers...

  1. #11
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    Ok, so let's go with this is real and she truly does love you and wants to spend her life with you.
    Will you move to her or will she move to you?

  2. #12
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    Originally Posted by MaybeThen
    If I just assume she is using me and I break up with her, I will miss out on a budding relationship.
    Well then, just keep doing what you're doing and wait it out. You want to stay, evidently, and while I would strongly discourage you from doing so, we can't change your mind either. In the end, the decision will likely taken out of your hands when she decides whether or not to go back to her ex or date somebody else altogether. I have a feeling you're going to learn that the hard way.

    As in your last thread, nearly nobody here is going to tell you that this woman or your relationship is the real deal and has a legitimate chance of lasting. Where she sourced these love letters is of little importance in terms of lending validity to the relationship, or lack thereof. It's a red flag when taken together with everything else, of course, but it's not the real problem.

  3. #13
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    Good grief. Please see a therapist.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    This was a vacation fling, you are spending a great deal of time and effort ruminating about it replete with researching every word, photo and aspect of her life. You know she is insincere and back with her bf back home. The time you are wasting on this seems like backpedaling to relive things. Do not send her any money.
    Originally Posted by MaybeThen
    We have an 18 year age difference between us, she is 30.
    I found that exact letter, word for word, on a mildly "internet-famous" person's social media account.

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  6. #15
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    This was one of the letters that I really felt showed how deeply she loved me. But a couple of days ago, I found that exact letter, word for word, on a mildly "internet-famous" person's social media account. It was a love letter that person had written for their partner! My gf had copied and pasted it to me
    I suggest you drop some of the other things she sent you into google searches and see what comes back.

  7. #16
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    Originally Posted by RayRay63
    I suggest you drop some of the other things she sent you into google searches and see what comes back.
    I did and I didnít find any other exact copy/paste hits. I even clicked on the link you told me to but it was just a bunch of random love images. I wasnt sure if there was something in particular I was looking for.

    This was a vacation fling, you are spending a great deal of time and effort ruminating about it replete with researching every word, photo and aspect of her life.
    A vacation fling that carried on for 4 months? And yes Iím trying to decipher everything because I felt confused and possibly deceived but didnít want to walk away on assumptions. Anyway I found photos of her wrapped around and kissing her ex on the same day she sent me the ďsoulmateĒ letter

    So I get it. Iím wrong. I just have to figure out how to end it or let it end on its own

  8. #17
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    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    Ok, so let's go with this is real and she truly does love you and wants to spend her life with you.
    Will you move to her or will she move to you?
    She has made comments about wanting to live here. But at this point I understand I was foolish to even tell her I wanted to spend my life with her

    As in your last thread, nearly nobody here is going to tell you that this woman or your relationship is the real deal and has a legitimate chance of lasting. Where she sourced these love letters is of little importance in terms of lending validity to the relationship, or lack thereof. It's a red flag when taken together with everything else, of course, but it's not the real problem.
    I am not sure what the "real problem" is, just a compilation of all her red flags put together I guess. I've pretty much let go of the fantasy that this was something magical and real. And yes I held on to a small % of possibility it would turn real, but I now understand that's just a fantasy I had. I think I am going to slowly taper out of this.

  9. #18
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    Originally Posted by MaybeThen
    I just have to figure out how to end it or let it end on its own
    It has already ended, with her friend-zoning you, while attempting to keep you as an option.

    Cut all contact with her.

  10. #19
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    Originally Posted by RayRay63
    It has already ended, with her friend-zoning you, while attempting to keep you as an option.

    Cut all contact with her.
    This is the type of comment that sets me back into my circular reasoning. How did it end when just yesterday she posted another photo of us from our trips and captions as "I need you, I miss you" That is not something ending, that's something continuing.

    But I've decided to taper out of this because it is kind of unlikely I will end up with her, maybe a slight chance like in a Disney movie where beauty and the beast end up together, but I am realizing this is not as real as I thought it was. I can't speak for the future, so maybe it will become real, but I don't want a broken heart so I will back out and see.

  11. #20
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    Originally Posted by MaybeThen

    But I've decided to taper out of this
    Good decision.

    To quote your other thread's opening post:

    she told me that she has been in contact with her ex and thereís feelings there ... She told me that she really enjoys the time we spend together, that she likes the feeling, and wants to continue talking to me. But she said she canít make any guarantees or promises
    I suggest you "taper" at high pace.

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