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Thread: Losing feelings for my bf.. freaking out!

  1. #1
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    Losing feelings for my bf.. freaking out!

    I started dating a man who is 71 yrs old and I am 55 yrs old about 2 1/2 months ago. I was crazy about him. I noticed he was very sensitive about his age. But when I looked at him I didn't see age. We slept together about 4 weeks after we started dating. After our first time together he made a comment about how I probably was going to move on because we already had sex. Ughh. Then he started making more hurtful remarks. Just out of no where. He belittled my feelings for him actually the whole time we have been together. Broke up with me 3 times as well.

    Each time something happened my feelings became less for him. Now I barely have any thing left for him! He has alot of feelings for him though! I know he is hurting. And if I could turn a switch on and still felt all the passion again for him I would. I am feeling so much anxiety and stress that sometimes I just feel numb. I can't even look at him right now because I can't look at him the way that I should.

    Looking for advice on how to rekindle my passion for him? Any other feedback is welcome too! Thanks!

  2. #2
    Bronze Member Eliza50's Avatar
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    He's made hurtful remarks, he's belittled your feelings and he's broken up with you 3 times in 2 months. Why do you even want to rekindle the passion and aren't just glad you're over him? Am I missing something?

  3. #3
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    2.5 months??

    That's not long enough for hardly anything. If you're having this bad of problems this early on, call it a day. Seriously...huge reg flags all over the place that this is not going to be a good thing.

  4. #4
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    This man has had 71 years to learn better. He's acting like a little boy, no wonder you lost feelings for him. I'd be more concerned if you still had feelings. You deserve better.

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  6. #5
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    Why on earth do you want to rekindle your passion for this jerk?

  7. #6
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    It sounds like he's letting his past experiences colour his life with you. He went into it expecting you to make comments about his age, leave him after you slept with him etc and his guard was very much up to protect himself. He belittled your feelings because his self esteem is such that he cannot understand why anyone would want to be with him or experience genuine feelings for him. Sadly, at 71, it's unlikely that is going to change, so with all that drama in what should be the honeymoon period, it's probably best to cut your losses. You are quite a bit younger than him, so you have plenty of time to find someone better for you.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Ok 10 weeks of dating is a good time to realize you're not compatible and the attraction isn't there. Happens all the time. He has done fine for 70 odd years without you and he'll be fine after you end it. Don't string anyone along.
    Originally Posted by Laurencesgur
    I started dating a man who is 71 yrs old and I am 55 yrs old about 2 1/2 months ago. Broke up with me 3 times as well.

  9. #8
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    OP, after 10 weeks it has been on and off three times. Run for the hills.

  10. #9
    Platinum Member boltnrun's Avatar
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    He has a funny way of showing he's "hurting". He's "hurting" so his solution is to verbally abuse you? That's supposed to make his "hurting" feel better?

    Why do you cling to this man? Do you fear you won't find anyone else?

    Look, I am about your same age. I am, gasp, "alone". And no calamity has befallen me. I would rather be totally single than try to placate a verbally abusive man.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    Yup, time to move on. This isnt going to work.

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