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Thread: Dad and Grandma asking us to leave our apartment - is this fair?

  1. #11
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    I'm very sorry. This puts you In a bad spot.

    I think that you should move back to Indiana. Cheaper rent and more options for the cat. Do not take out a loan.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    Get out of dodge. IMO living off the low rent should have been predicted as temporary. Also knowing that it was illegal for her to be subletting it, is another warning sign that eviction was a possibility and a shady act within itself. But yes the offer of the low rent was quite the lure.
    Trust me when I say this, in that time you should have socked away money to move when the gravy train runs dry. Never depend on family or anyone for that matter. I myself save money when I can just in case I lose my job or can't take care of myself. You just never know.

    Getting mad about it, does nothing for your situation. Your husband did the right thing by taking charge of the situation, getting a loan, and keeping you two off the street. Chin up, go forward.

  3. #13
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    What type of work do you and your husband do?

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    Originally Posted by smackie9
    Get out of dodge. IMO living off the low rent should have been predicted as temporary. Also knowing that it was illegal for her to be subletting it, is another warning sign that eviction was a possibility and a shady act within itself. But yes the offer of the low rent was quite the lure.
    Trust me when I say this, in that time you should have socked away money to move when the gravy train runs dry. Never depend on family or anyone for that matter. I myself save money when I can just in case I lose my job or can't take care of myself. You just never know.

    Getting mad about it, does nothing for your situation. Your husband did the right thing by taking charge of the situation, getting a loan, and keeping you two off the street. Chin up, go forward.
    He's been using this opportunity to pay off his car (not quite there yet) and his medical bills (also not paid off yet).


    Originally Posted by Hollyj
    What type of work do you and your husband do?
    He is currently a 3rd shift security guard for a private community. Last year he has a forklift driver at a marina.

    I work in retail part time. A 2nd job as a fire performer for a local talent group (mostly in summer) and I have been using most of my spare time trying to get an entrepreneurial digital business off the ground as a relationship coach and consultant, still building my audience.

  5.  

  6. #15
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    I also applied for a loan for $3,500 and was declined due to my short credit history. My score is good but my history isn't lengthy enough, apparently.

  7. #16
    Gold Member SarahLancaster's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by ThatwasThen
    No when she's charging them rent she can't. Now that rent has been paid, it's not a landlord/tenant agreement and the same rules apply to grandma/landlord and granddaughter/tenant as would any stranger landlord and tenant.
    Right, but she has the right to give them a 30 day notice and have them out of there, as long as there is no written contract.

  8. #17
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    Technically, she did mention this at the beginning of November but it wasn't confirmed that this is what needed to happen. She just said he "might" need to come back. She was under the impression my dad had a talk with me about this but he never did, until I had to call him and ask him directly if he wanted to move back in here, and he said yes. That was 2 weeks ago.

    A coworker of mine said she can't kick us out without an eviction notice. (Not 100% sure if that's true) but I also don't know if she can legally even give us an eviction notice since she's not registered as a subletter. It's all been verbal but I DO have all the receipts of our payments to her. If she wanted to ever get nasty about it and call the police about an unwanted guest, I could see what they'd have to say about our rent history as well. She could possibly be fined. (I wouldn't really want do that, because she's still my grandma and I still love her and my dad) I don't think she'd do that but then again, I didn't think she would be doing what she is now.

  9. #18
    Platinum Member j.man's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by JDAnthony
    Technically, she did mention this at the beginning of November but it wasn't confirmed that this is what needed to happen. She just said he "might" need to come back. She was under the impression my dad had a talk with me about this but he never did, until I had to call him and ask him directly if he wanted to move back in here, and he said yes. That was 2 weeks ago.

    A coworker of mine said she can't kick us out without an eviction notice. (Not 100% sure if that's true) but I also don't know if she can legally even give us an eviction notice since she's not registered as a subletter. It's all been verbal but I DO have all the receipts of our payments to her. If she wanted to ever get nasty about it and call the police about an unwanted guest, I could see what they'd have to say about our rent history as well. She could possibly be fined. (I wouldn't really want do that, because she's still my grandma and I still love her and my dad) I don't think she'd do that but then again, I didn't think she would be doing what she is now.
    You provide eviction notices to residents, not leasees or sublesees. You could be a squatter, and so long as you've got 30 days documented there, you've earned your right to a 30+ day eviction notice.

    That said, while you can and should assert your rights if necessary, you were told a month ago your own father might need the place to stay. You confirmed in November with your father that he would have to. You've been living well below market rate for what, three years? What's going on with a dual-income, childless couple where they can't save up for their own place, even if including a pet deposit? If you need your 30 days, assert your 30 days. You've got legal authority to dig your heels in. As far as any moral high ground goes, I'd consider it exhausted come Jan. 1st.

    Just be decent people. No bridges need burning here.

  10. #19
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    Originally Posted by j.man
    You provide eviction notices to residents, not leasees or sublesees. You could be a squatter, and so long as you've got 30 days documented there, you've earned your right to a 30+ day eviction notice.

    That said, while you can and should assert your rights if necessary, you were told a month ago your own father might need the place to stay. You confirmed in November with your father that he would have to. You've been living well below market rate for what, three years? What's going on with a dual-income, childless couple where they can't save up for their own place, even if including a pet deposit? If you need your 30 days, assert your 30 days. You've got legal authority to dig your heels in. As far as any moral high ground goes, I'd consider it exhausted come Jan. 1st.

    Just be decent people. No bridges need burning here.
    We haven't saved due to old debt we've been paying off, including car and medical bills. I was without a car of my own until a year ago so I spent money Ubering to work until my sister gave me her old car.

    His wages are $10 and hour. Mine at my retail store is $13 but I only get 20 hours a week, sometimes less, which is why I have 2 different side hustles in areas that I am passionate about.

    I don't want to burn bridges. My sister has already done so with the both of them years ago. (long story)

    She's the only grandparent I have and he's the only parent I have left.

    And I'm the only daughter that will even speak to him and same for my grandma. We're a very divided family, unfortunately.

  11. #20
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    That's some sweet deal you got there for a few years. The party's over. Rent for $600?! I can see it from both sides. Your dad should have saved his money but both of you should have also. I'd bow out respectfully and let them work it out (mother and son). It doesn't matter what your dad does. The real issue, to me, is both of you should never have rested easy in this studio apartment for long. It was a ticking time bomb. Wouldn't you rather be out on your own and off your grandmother's property eventually? That would have been my goal.

    You can go through the hassle of fighting for the place and asserting your rights, prolonging the inevitable and wasting your energy about how irresponsible your dad is and how unfair your grandmother is but it won't change the facts. Your dad can't find a place and he's moving in. Those are your family dynamics. We don't get to choose the types of people we have for family so there you have it. I'd take this as a lesson learned, move forwards and find a place that accepts a small four legged pet cat and lower your expectations. This means finding a basement suite or somewhere out of the way if you want to have your cake and eat it too - pet, lower rent/within budget, stress-free living.

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