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She is very controlling


Nathanelf45

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So my girlfriend is very controlling and manipulative. I'm a 26 year old Male and she is a 34 year old female and she is my first girlfriend. I have been caught up in a bad relationship for 2 years we started dating 2 years ago and have been living together for 1.5 years. The beginning of the relationship it started off with small things and has escalated. Actually I could grab two up 911 reports of her threatening her life she doesnt get the attention she wants in the 2 years I've been with her. Its constant arguing on a daily hourly basis pretty much cause I'm not what she wants or stuff isnt going the way she wants, what she wants is full control over my life. Harassing me all the time and purposely picking arguments. When we first got together she tried to tell me I shouldnt go to church every weekend because she doesnt like it and I told her to bad. We would get into arguments she is so fixed on that I'm trying to cheat on her that im not allowed to leave the house unless she gets to go with me it's very rare for me to be able to leave the house together me. We also can never go out without an argument. Always accusing me of checking out other girls, she even had the audacity to tell me I was checking out little kids. One week she decided to tweak my buttons about sex, she was begging to have sex in the morning all week so one morning I woke up thought I would surprise and she said no and obviously I got upset but I didnt say anything out of respect. but when she brought up the topic I got upset and left cause I realized she was playing head games with me, she just one day decided that "her sex drive had something wrong with it and may need viagara" which was a lie cause we have 2 or 3 times. Actually that was one of the 911 calls was a about she threatened her life if she didnt get the sex she wanted, she wanted sex like 3-4 times in one night and I told her that was absurd. But anyways back to the story so after I left I talked to her on the phone and she told me to come back and we could make love, but it didnt happen she was just messing with me but I didnt say anything I just layed down and watched TV with her. Then she brought up the topic again I got upset and left. And she tried to lock me out of the house it like 12 in the morning and it was 19 degrees out. Her excuse was I got to mad and left which wasnt true all I did was get up and get dressed and leave. I tried to come back and get my phone that's how i figured put she locked me out. She dead bolted the door the landlord never gave us a key for the dead bolt only the regular part of the door. So i knocked on the door nicely and asked for my phone and she refused to answer the door, so i started kicking the door and then i went around the back and busted the window to get in and she was just sitting in the living room watching TV and obviously she got upset and came and asked why I was busting the window. And I told her because she didnt answer the door. And she was like I got to mad at her, then it became she was using the bathroom, then it turned into she didnt hear me but the bathroom is literally like next to the front door so there was no way she didnt hear me knocking before I started banging and all she had to do was say hold on I'm using the bathroom. Then she decided she was coming on the walk with me and that I couldn't cool off by myself. So fast forward a few months later I caught her going thru my phone because she didnt like that I was reaching out to my friend telling her how controlling she is and what I deal with every day. I found out she was going thru my phone when I take a shower before we go to bed. She tried to play it off as my best friends girlfriend tells her everything I talk on the phone to my friend on the phone and she is telling me this at 3 in the morning. I didnt catch on the first time but then she tried the same excuse again a few days later and I knew then and there she was going thru my phone and I locked my phone and she got mad at me for it. So fast forward a few months later I had gotten a new phone but didnt put a lock on it so she started doing it again. This time she kept trieing to delete my friend off Facebook until I found out and put a lock on my phone again. A couple weeks later shes now accusing me of checking out my cousins mom which I wasnt. Then i wanted to go to a job seminar and she tried to tell me that i couldn't if she couldn't go and i told her I'm taking the bus and going by myself and she was like no im going too you cant tell me I can't it's a public bus and etc. So I was like I'm taking a uber and she was like no that job seminar is near the mall and there's girls there, and by then after dealing with this for almost 2 years I had resorted to slapping her up. So like any situation I decided I was going to my aunt's for the rest of the night it was 11 at night and she was like no if you leave I'm calling the cops. So I told her to call them I dont care so she went to dial 911 then stopped. And I told her if she wasnt gonna call them then I am cause I was irritated with her. And she was like dont you will get arrested and I was like I dont I'm calling anyway. So the cops and I guess in the 911 call there was a mix up cause I told the operator I slapped her she wont let me out of the house and etc. So when the cops came they didnt really know what was going on but they said it wasnt their problem and that they would only do somthing about it if there was a domestic or somebody wanted to beat somone so then that's when I was like well I already hit her so I got arrested obviously but in the car when they were talking to me and I was telling them how she is they said "that's how lady's are my wife is like that" so all they didnt was justify her because she is a female". I'm not saying I was right for slapping but the cops dont do nothing about anything in today's world unless "they have a problem" they dont prevent problems. So we got the no contact order dropped after 2 months cause it was my first offense we were gonna try maybe working things out. What the problem is nothing is being worked out she still doing the same stuff and not trying to change. So I told her last month I'm not staying much longer I actually tried to leave an she refused to let me get my clothes out of my dresser and etc. So what stunt did she pulled now. We aren't on a lease anymore as of like 8 months ago. So she told the landlord last week that we are moving out so we have no choice but to move out. Why would she do this because if I rent out another apartment I would be on another lease meaning I cant just leave. So i have decided to act like I'm not interested in apartments atm so we are renting a hotel for 2 months in another city. So I planning on telling the cops in that area the situation that the relationship isnt getting better. I have evidence on my phone from the beginning of the relationship up until now that she likes to harass me and be in control. Yesterday she was rambling on accusing me of doing things I havent done. And then she was like last time somone did something to me I gave them a black eye and I didnt say anything it was better off that way cause if I did it wouldnt have came off the right way, shes just trying to boil my buttons. I havent gave into nothing she has been doing since I have been back. The teacher in my domestic class said to somone else in a similar situation that you can get a restraining order, but that most lawyers wouldnt advise it cause it might escalate the case she has on me if I had a no contact with her. I'm still thinking of what to do since nothing is working out. I know that I cant take it into my own hands this time because that's not how the problem is solved.

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You need to move out back to your parents and get a restraining order. Why are you taking domestic violence classes? You know what to do. Move out go back to your parents stop communicating with her or end up in jail or in the hospital. If you use drugs or drink heavily get treatment for that as well.

I'm a 26 year old Male and she is a 34 year old female been living together for 1.5 years. The teacher in my domestic class said to somone else in a similar situation that you can get a restraining order.
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You need to move out back to your parents and get a restraining order. Why are you taking domestic violence classes? You know what to do. Move out go back to your parents stop communicating with her or end up in jail or in the hospital. If you use drugs or drink heavily get treatment for that as well.

 

Because he got arrested for hitting her. It's in his OP (probably hard to find in the massive wall of text).

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