After 4 dates he referred to me as “great company.” What does that mean?

Casually dating a guy. We’ve gone on four dates. It became physical on third date- no sex anytime soon. I’m 30, female dentist. He’s 35 and owns and works in his business. He’s the youngest guy I’ve ever dated.

We haven’t had any talks yet in regards to where this relationship is going and or if he’s dating others. (Most likely he is, missing a lot from text and conversations especially at night). He was sweet to take me home around 1am last night so I sent a text thankin g him for a great night and driving me home 8 miles so late at night and he replied “thank you for being such great company” is that friend zoning?

Any advice is appreciated. Thanks!

I wouldn't jump to conclusions. I think it was an innocuous statement. He was being polite since it's only been 4 days thus far. Give it time. See how your friendship and relationship will develop. Try not to nitpick and read into every word and sentence. Have good times, enjoy conversations and see where both of you are months from now. It's still premature to say anything at this point. You're still strangers after 4 dates and don't really know each other well. Observe each others personalities and characters which will take months at least.

I think that’s a very nice compliment. It feels to me like he was saying he enjoyed being around you.

It depends, I suppose. It sure is mild to me and a little lacking in spark but some people are not passionate people and some are also subdued or nervous. He owns his own business so you might have been expecting a lot more passion and gusto (a go-getter). He may be behaving in a reserved way if you yourself are ultra reserved and seem very conservative. Keep in mind that you're giving off vibes too.

Take things one step at a time. No harm getting to know one another. If you're not feeling you're not feeling it. Don't over-question it and trust your instincts if it just isn't right.

I'd say don't take it as a negative. If I was trying to friendzone a woman I wouldnt tell her she was great company for fear of giving her the wrong impression.

Just take it a day at a time.

I agree that he was paying you a compliment.

We men can be a bit arkward, you know.

I'd say you think too much.

He drove you home late at night and tells you he likes spending time with you.

What is making you nervous about him?

Is it because he is not as obsessed with communicating as you expect him to be?

Do you want to date "casually" or do you want to have the exclusive talk before "it becomes physical"? Decide what you want out of this situation or dating in general. If things 'got physical' then it would be fwb-zoning, not friendzoning.

Casually dating a guy. We’ve gone on four dates. It became physical on third date.

We haven’t had any talks yet in regards to where this relationship is going and or if he’s dating others. driving me home 8 miles so late at night and he replied “thank you for being such great company” is that friend zoning?

I think that's a lovely compliment all the time and especially at this stage! And that he texted back so late at night.

I would not read into his communication at night -I dated a ton and did not get exclusive after only 4 dates with someone new - and my dates could be during the day, in the morning or at night. I specifically didn't communicate with new guys on date nights if I wasn't with that guy because it was none of his business if I was home or out on a Saturday night (also -I had no cell phone so communication was via land line, work phone, e-mail and instant message - and once we were more serious we typically would talk on the phone daily, once, on the days we didn't see each other and email some. I don't relate at all to constantly keeping in touch -I think it kills a budding romance or at least risks it).

It's a compliment. I've got friends, family, and a wife who are great company. I've had flings and one night stands that were great company. Iv'e had women I ended up not being romantically interested in but were great company. Try not to get so emotionally invested only a few dates in where you're dissecting pretty benign comments.

I think he gave you a compliment and was a gentleman about it.

What would you have done if he reacted asking to drive back and do the full mugambo?

BTW, you're 30 and he at 35 is the youngest man you've dated?

Sabrina. Great company. You ask what does that mean?

It just means what it says. It cannot be interpreted as "I want to spend my whole life with you and far beyond into eternity."

I think saying you are great company is really nice. And as for not answering a couple texts, I don't think that means anything, he was probably just BUSY. :-) Don't think or worry if he's dating other people. Just have fun while you're with him. Have you planned another date?

The response was way too ambiguous to tell.

Just 4 dates in, you aren't even a stage where you can say you are dating, casually or otherwise, let alone create relationship type expectations like texting/talking every evening.

What he said was a nice compliment, but you, OP, need take a deep breath and slow your roll. You seem to be getting way ahead of yourself.

OP are you used to guys love bombing you in the beginning of a relationship? Because from my perspective, I think that's a nice compliment to pay someone.

Is he being reserved as he is still getting to know you? Yes, and that's a good thing... beware of those that throw themselves headlong into relationships and bomb you with elaborate compliments, as they are seeking something other than a long term life partner and their actions are rarely sustainable over time.

... he replied “thank you for being such great company” is that friend zoning?

No, it's just thanking you back for spending time with him.

Thanks for all the helpful responses. Backstory is it started out very flirty but he’s not much of a communicator. I’m not that great either but I at least talk about what needs to be addressed.

We went from flirty and talking daily down to him telling me everything he eats and does. Recently he’s stopped, lots of one word answer texts and both have backed off. He even went so far as not to text me for 2.5 days only to message me the day of our date. He seems hesitant and unsure at Rome’s. He tells me I’m too much for him (claims it’s a joke) but then won’t let me just go home after a date.

After four dates why does he have to be in contact more than once or twice a week to set up and confirm the date? Sounds like he wants to get to know you in person.

"Won't let you"? Or do you mean you want more and he's not offering more than casual dating or fwb? You don't like how he texts, you don't like his expressions, you don't like how he communicates in general or how it's going so why bother dating him?

won’t let me just go home after a date.

I think that's a lovely compliment all the time and especially at this stage! And that he texted back so late at night.

 

I would not read into his communication at night -I dated a ton and did not get exclusive after only 4 dates with someone new - and my dates could be during the day, in the morning or at night. I specifically didn't communicate with new guys on date nights if I wasn't with that guy because it was none of his business if I was home or out on a Saturday night (also -I had no cell phone so communication was via land line, work phone, e-mail and instant message - and once we were more serious we typically would talk on the phone daily, once, on the days we didn't see each other and email some. I don't relate at all to constantly keeping in touch -I think it kills a budding romance or at least risks it).

You're right - constantly keeping in touch at the beginning does kill a budding romance. I like being surprised when the person gets in touch with me. I'd rather hear from them every few days than every day to keep things fun and exciting.

You start off with "Casually dating a guy." Everything else you write is far from you taking this as casual. Be careful of trying to float through pretending to be casual about the whole thing or he may become bored, take it as disinterest, or continue to take things slow without realizing you are negatively analyzing many things he does. And if you didn't like that he didn't text for 2 days, it may be time for you to step up and send a text if that is important to you.

In the beginning stages of dating, you both are strangers. Interpretation about someone you don't know can cause a lot of problems.

You start off with "Casually dating a guy." Everything else you write is far from you taking this as casual. Be careful of trying to float through pretending to be casual about the whole thing or he may become bored, take it as disinterest, or continue to take things slow without realizing you are negatively analyzing many things he does. And if you didn't like that he didn't text for 2 days, it may be time for you to step up and send a text if that is important to you.

 

In the beginning stages of dating, you both are strangers. Interpretation about someone you don't know can cause a lot of problems.

Do guys think it's disinterest if you act casual about the whole thing? I thought guys like "casual", at least at the beginning.

Do guys think it's disinterest if you act casual about the whole thing? I thought guys like "casual", at least at the beginning.

I'm not sure why you would generalize about guys since individual people date for individual reasons. I think in general people feel most comfortable getting to know each other at a reasonable pace over a period of time when it comes to dating. I think it's best when individuals discuss their general life and relationship goals (not specific to that person) early on in dating so that everyone is on the same page. I don't think giving someone space to get to know you is "acting casual" just like I don't think someone who gushes all over you is necessarily serious/sees serious potential. It depends.

Do guys think it's disinterest if you act casual about the whole thing? I thought guys like "casual", at least at the beginning.

Careful about marketing yourself to the masses with generalizations about them. Skip that, and focus on you and what YOU want. Once you're clear about that, you can state your reasons for dating up front--no messy kid stuff of trying to play cool. That sets you up for sleeping first, asking questions later, which is a drag and rarely gets people any closer to what they really want.

If you're relationship material, own it. It simplifies everything and helps you to screen out bad matches early. Tell new prospective dates that you view yourself as dating to find a relationship, and ask whether he views himself the same way. If not or he doesn't know, then enjoy your exchange but end it by telling him that it was great to meet him, and if he ever decides that he wants to date for the same reasons as you, he's welcome to contact you.

It makes no sense to tiptoe 'around' what you want hoping to land it from someone who would have been very happy to tell you where HE stands on dating if you had only asked. The whole point of dating is to learn whether someone is a GOOD match for you, so why pretzel yourself in attempts to be everybody's anything, when you can simply decide what you want for yourself and shoot for finding the RIGHT match for that, instead?

Don't work backwards. Start from the authentic YOU, and then screen out anyone who is not a good match for you. It will spare you a lot of wheel spinning, because most people are NOT our match. That's just natural odds, but they're perfect when you are only looking for ONE good match for you.

Allow wrong matches to pass early.