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Thread: Tinder question

  1. #1
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    Tinder question

    So I use Tinder every now and then, and last Thursday I matched with this guy, we exchanged a few messages, he seemed pretty nice. He told me he was looking for something more serious, not just to hook up. He wanted to hang out Saturday, but I already made plans, and I told him I was going out with my friends Saturday night (he asked about my plans). He sent me this message heíd be jealous, because there will be men hitting on me all night. I thought he was joking at first, so I didnít pay much attention to it. He then sent me another message, he basically wanted me to message him if I meet someone else that I like. I just told him I was still single, didnít think too much about it, but then yesterday he asked me again if anything happened on my night out. I texted him back I didnít feel like I had to tell him anything, I felt he was being too invasive, like I didnít even meet this guy in real life. This was a red flag for me, that he kept asking about me meeting other men. I donít want to be that person who sees everything as a red flag, but this truly made me uncomfortable, like I didnít promise him anything. What do you think about this?

  2. #2
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    He is needy , insecure and is showing you what he is about .....and this is before you have been on a date ! Maybe some women like this kind of neediness ...you don't so I think you already know where this is going . I am with you by the way ...

  3. #3
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    That would make me very uncomfortable, too. You have never even met this guy.

  4. #4
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    Well, you are lucky you found out so early on that he is needy and insecure. It saved you time.

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  6. #5
    Gold Member SarahLancaster's Avatar
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    OMG. That is absolutely creepy. He sounds like a psychopath. Please block him.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member indea08's Avatar
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    Agree. HUGE, creepy, bright red flag!!

  8. #7
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    I agree. I wouldn't even have shared with him how those inappropriate and creepy messages made me feel -I would have just closed off contact right then.

  9. #8
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    Thanks guys, I had a bad feeling when he kept sending me those messages and as I'm a private person, I wanted to see if I'm not overreacting. He stopped texting me after I told him I didn't like his questions, I'll block him in case he decides to stalk me or something.

  10. #9
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    Originally Posted by pippy longstocking
    He is needy , insecure and is showing you what he is about .....and this is before you have been on a date ! Maybe some women like this kind of neediness ...you don't so I think you already know where this is going . I am with you by the way ...
    I definitely don't like needy men, I once had this boyfriend who would get jealous when I went with my girlfriends to the movies or if I didn't text him back quickly, so i don't want go through that again.

  11. #10
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    Originally Posted by kim42
    I definitely don't like needy men, I once had this boyfriend who would get jealous when I went with my girlfriends to the movies or if I didn't text him back quickly, so i don't want go through that again.
    I don't think this is just garden variety needy if he is texting like this to a stranger. I met a guy like that -at a party - we went out once, and then apparently he saw me dancing with another guy at a singles event (and ironically the guy was just a friend -we were joking around to make his ex jealous) - so he told me after he saw that he went out and got very drunk and was so upset. Ugh.

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