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Thread: Help!! Need Advice!! Please no judgements!!

  1. #1

    Help!! Need Advice!! Please no judgements!!

    Hi. My boyfriend and I currently have a long distance relationship for the past 9 months. He lives with his cousin who constantly has women over at his place every night of the week. I had a lot of trust that my boyfriend wouldn't cheat on me, but then you get that feeling in the pit of your stomach and have that feeling something isn't right.

    I had talked with him about my suspicions and of course he went to great lengths to reassure me that he was being faithful. So a few nights ago, I was spending time with my gal pals drinking some wine and one of we decide to text him and basically play a joke to see what he would do or say.

    My friend is texting him just normal stuff but then it started getting very suggestive in the matter of sex so I told my friend to ask him if he would be down to have sex with her that she would go to his house. He was all over it like nothing giving the address and everything. At one point when she was texting him, I sent a text just letting him know I was good and loved him. Of course I never got a response back from him at all.

    I know it seems like I trapped him, but it was a joke we pulled on him that turned out to be something I wasn't expecting. How do I handle this? Where should I go from this point knowing that he had intention to sleep with someone else?

  2. #2
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    My strong sense is he knew you were behind this and he was calling you on your bluff. Your story makes little sense because if this is true it means he accepted a text from a strange number but he probably recognized the area code as having something to do with you - and I think the joke is on you.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by misshoneybee
    Hi. \ I had a lot of trust that my boyfriend wouldn't cheat on me, but then you get that feeling in the pit of your stomach and have that feeling something isn't right.
    What happened to cause this feeling?

  4. #4
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    Of course he knew it was from you and your friends.

    That was a really foolish thing to do.

    It isn't very funny now is it?

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Sounds like he saw through this childish game and played along to turn the tables. Do you think he doesn't know you by now well enough to know you were playing games or testing him?
    Originally Posted by misshoneybee
    My friend is texting him just normal stuff but then it started getting very suggestive in the matter of sex so I told my friend to ask him if he would be down to have sex with her that she would go to his house. He was all over it like nothing giving the address and everything.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Jibralta's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by misshoneybee
    Hi. My boyfriend and I currently have a long distance relationship for the past 9 months. He lives with his cousin who constantly has women over at his place every night of the week. I had a lot of trust that my boyfriend wouldn't cheat on me, but then you get that feeling in the pit of your stomach and have that feeling something isn't right.

    I had talked with him about my suspicions and of course he went to great lengths to reassure me that he was being faithful. So a few nights ago, I was spending time with my gal pals drinking some wine and one of we decide to text him and basically play a joke to see what he would do or say.

    My friend is texting him just normal stuff but then it started getting very suggestive in the matter of sex so I told my friend to ask him if he would be down to have sex with her that she would go to his house. He was all over it like nothing giving the address and everything. At one point when she was texting him, I sent a text just letting him know I was good and loved him. Of course I never got a response back from him at all.

    I know it seems like I trapped him, but it was a joke we pulled on him that turned out to be something I wasn't expecting. How do I handle this? Where should I go from this point knowing that he had intention to sleep with someone else?
    You know him best. If you really believe he was serious in his responses, you should break up with him. I don't see any other alternative.

  8. #7
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    What happened next ? When she didn't turn up , what did he say , did he keep messaging ?

  9. #8
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    That wasn't very nice playing a joke on him like that. It's not nice of him to play along with it either. This doesn't seem like a nice relationship at all. Why go through all this trouble for someone you don't trust?

    You can handle this by stopping yourself from any big decisions in the next day or two and thinking hard about whether this person is right for you. What I used to do was also think about how the relationship affected me over time (for previous relationships where things started to go sideways or didn't work out). If I felt like I wasn't recognizing myself or not feeling like myself or doing things I wouldn't normally do or out of character, this was a good sign that I was not heading down the right path. Be more in tune with yourself and aware of how the people around you affect you.

  10. #9
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Yes...here's a 'random' woman texting offering sex.🧦 Do you think he's still waiting by the door in his boxers?
    Originally Posted by pippy longstocking
    What happened next ? When she didn't turn up , what did he say , did he keep messaging ?

  11. #10
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Yes...here's a 'random' woman texting offering sex.🧦 Do you think he's still waiting by the door in his boxers?
    frickin ell looooooooooooooool

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