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Thread: One year post breakup, feelings

  1. #1
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    One year post breakup, feelings

    So itís been little over a year since my breakup and I thought Iíd post a little thoughts on how I feel about my ex, the situation and how I feel about it all.

    Over time Iíve came to the conclusion that I donít blame her for breaking up with me. She only did what she needed to do to make her life better. Of course how she handled the financial split by not keeping her promises did upset me but in the end I still look at her very favorably.

    I found out that she did and insurance scam and scammed me out of a 1,100$. I texted her about it 3 months ago(first contact in 6-7months) about it. I know I came off as a complete by threatening small claims court but I honestly didnít know how to handle the situation. I was only interested in the money by which I had proof from multiple people that she had screwed me over. She insisted it was all a mistake and that all these people from the company are lying but I know she was lying. She said she would fax me proof of what she was saying was the truth, I told her to text me a photo but she never did, so I just let it go.

    A month later she text my mom threatening to take me to court over the 1,100$(value of phone) that I paid for. This reason was because I didnít pay a month on another loan(value) 400$ because I was mad that she screwed me over. I realized that it was stupid for me to do that so I paid it but my credit card didnít go through because of an error, which caused my and her credit to drop SIGNIFICANTLY idk about hers for sure but mine did. It was a pure mistake on my part which I suffered for and I didnít realize it until a month after I thought I paid it. TO BE CLEAR IT WASNT ON PURPOSE FOR ME TO MAKE OUR CREDIT DROP OR TO GET REVENGE. It was anger that turned into a mistake by accidentally typing the wrong number on a credit card. I realized quickly that it was stupid to sacrifice my own credit to get some meaningless revenge in which I got over quick. Company doesnt notify if payment fails FYI.

    She brung up our relationship, I assume to hurt me because she said some things like how much she didnít care about me and how she hoped Iíd burn in hell and a whole lot more things, i made myself out to be immune to this by sticking up to it. I said things I didnít mean like idc about you or what your doing in your life. She told me about how she fell out of love for me way before she left me.

    It wasnít my intention to let it go that far, but I felt the need to stick up to someone who was actively planning to do things to try an hurt me. I ended up letting it all go anyway which made me regret ever contacting her in the first place. 100% it was about the phone/money to me and not about the relationship. I didnít tell her anything about my life and I know nothing of what sheís doing in hers. She did tell me during a long text message telling me how good sheís doing since leaving me but it also included how horrible of a person I am.

    It sucks because I do care about her, months ago I thought at this moment now Iíd be over her and not thinking about her but I still think about her everyday, of course not as much or enough to text her or look her up online. Iím starting to realize Iíll never fully stop thinking about her. I still do love her and I think Iíll always will but itís not the same. I miss things about her that I can imagine like it was yesterday but at the same time it feels like itís been forever from the emptiness I feel about it.

    I feel like I have my identity now and I feel like Iím on track to a better life, but itís weird because I still hurt about it and it feels good kinda. Iím glad I still hurt in someways because It shows me that I did care about her way more than I thought and that I do love her. Itís completely unconditional and I say that fully expecting to never see or hear from her again.

    I wish I couldíve been truthful and told her the truth of how sorry I am for the way I treated her and how I really do hope she is happy but I couldnít because it just wasnít right, the situation wasnít right, she still hated me I know she probably always will so I had to protect myself from the hurtful things she told me. She clearly doesnít care and I didnít wanna be that guy professing my thoughts to a girl who just didnít care, or have them misinterpreted for someone who canít move on. I just donít know her now but I still care and thatíll never change.

    Over time I realize that she hates me most probably because I made her feel like she deserved the treatment I gave to her, that maybe she was at fault for my horrible actions. She didnít deserve that, no one who says ďI love youĒ to someone deserves to feel like that. So many things I wanna say to her but I just tell them to myself sometimes because I pretty sure I wonít ever be able to tell them to her.

    In the current day I think that Iím different, I know what itís like to love so much and get your heart ripped out and I think thereís some beauty I that(of course it would be better without the heartache that comes after). Life went on and it goes on Iím trying to do the best I can in it.

    I want a relationship of course, but Iím not ready rn work, living situation, etc. I stress so much that I wonít find someone to love who I wanna be with and that Iíll be lonely forever. It scares the crap outta me, but maybe someday itíll happen and if it does itíll be different and itíll all be because of her and the people Iíve met since.

  2. #2
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    Originally Posted by Austino96

    I found out that she did and insurance scam and scammed me out of a 1,100$.

    A month later she text my mom threatening to take me to court over the 1,100$(value of phone) that I paid for. This reason was because I didnít pay a month on another loan(value) 400$ because I was mad that she screwed me over. I realized that it was stupid for me to do that so I paid it but my credit card didnít go through because of an error, which caused my and her credit to drop SIGNIFICANTLY idk about hers for sure but mine did. It was a pure mistake on my part which I suffered for and I didnít realize it until a month after I thought I paid it. TO BE CLEAR IT WASNT ON PURPOSE FOR ME TO MAKE OUR CREDIT DROP OR TO GET REVENGE. It was anger that turned into a mistake by accidentally typing the wrong number on a credit card. I realized quickly that it was stupid to sacrifice my own credit to get some meaningless revenge in which I got over quick. Company doesnt notify if payment fails FYI.
    .
    I find it difficult to believe how you are out of pocket because of her insurance scam??
    Surely itís the insurance company out of pocket , not you? And why 9 months later you come to realise of $1100 loss???

    What was the $400 loan payment for? Something with both your names on? But whose responsibility to pay?

    You say it was not out of revenge but you contradict yourself? The intent was there! You said so yourself.

    No itís not up to a company to notify of you of your money keeping. Itís up to them to recover money owed when they check their accounts.

    Why did you not notice that you had an extra $400 in your account??

    Please, donít make this all about money when you donít keep check on your bank account and donít notice $1100 missing or $400 extra!!

    ???

  3. #3
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    This relationship sounds like it was insanely toxic.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    5 years from now you will look back and say "Holy crap, what the hell was I thinking?" and "What did I ever see in her?!"

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