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Thread: Should I Ruin My Three Year Relationship?

  1. #21
    Platinum Member lostandhurt's Avatar
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    People that are truly in love with someone and love them as you state you do don't contact other men for attention, drunk or not. The drinking is an excuse, not a reason.

    A house cannot cure what ails you, it will only distract you for a time.

    If you asked your bf what is the most import thing to him, a house or your emotional well being what do think he would say?

    I think you believe you love him and that may very well be true but your actions do not show love, it shows insecurities, lies and selfishness. Do you seriously want to continue down this path?

    First things first and that is getting your emotional health straightened out. A house can wait.

    Be honest with yourself

    Lost Getting Ready for a First Date

  2. #22
    Bronze Member EternalOptimis's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by lostandhurt
    People that are truly in love with someone and love them as you state you do don't contact other men for attention, drunk or not. The drinking is an excuse, not a reason.
    Never a truer word said. Alcohol was the symptom not the cause.

    Originally Posted by lostandhurt
    I think you believe you love him and that may very well be true but your actions do not show love, it shows insecurities, lies and selfishness.
    There is a very big difference between Love and Attachment. What you describe defines the latter.

    Don't make any major decisions till you've been sober a few weeks and determined you *want* only your bf (rather than being prepared to tolerate the monogamy in order to maintain all the other stuff)

  3. #23
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    Originally Posted by freedomfight
    The reason I canít afford therapy right now, but can afford a house is because of my budget. I budgeted more for the house and havenít quite reached what I needed for therapy. Even the house budget, my boyfriend contributes the most because he has a high paying job.
    Honestly I havenít put therapy as high up in properties as I needed to. I am doing that now.

    Also the house is a townhome, not an actual house so itís cheaper
    You need to back out of buying the house and get therapy.

    Originally Posted by freedomfight
    Iíve lived with my boyfriend for a year now. We both work full time and go to school part time. My parents kicked me out because they are religious and strict and one day when I was 18 I told my dad I was going to a family memberís house without asking and he through all of my things in trash bags so I had to move.
    My dad had trust issues with me after he caught me when I was eleven ďtalkingĒ to an adult male. Of course this man was a pedophile and most people wouldnít blame me, but my dad believed I was mature enough and shouldíve known better idk

    Therapy is expensive where I live, insurance does not cover everything and school therapists are backlogged (America struggles). Trust me Iím staying sober.
    many work on a sliding scale, but you can afford it if you have enough to buy a house.

    You can say your parents are religious blah blah blah they are evil, but it sounds more like they were trying to protect you and it was time for some tough love/the last straw perhaps. Maybe when you are older, in 10 years when you are past the teen/early 20s "i know more than my parents stage" you will put themselves in your shoes.

  4. #24
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    Yep
    Buffer

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