Am I not seeing the sense in this situation?

[qwertyscream]

Where is this ring "waiting" Or did you just write that to practice, since you are using this thread as a sort of public jury ?

We bought the ring together. She designed it herself, got it made, tried it on and witnessed the exchange of cash and she took it back to hers to show her mum, then gave it back for me to propose.. Thats how the ring is “waiting” with me lol.

Not a public duty, I just need help figuring this out.

@bluecastle
I’m in that exact limbo. I keep thinking I’m done but I don’t want to be a failure. I’ve failed at so many things in life. I’ve always been one for trying, but everything - work, self employment, and now relationship... I at least want to make something work as I actually do really, really love her.

I feel stupid for being a man and acting like this, but the battle is as real as it can be. Just need to figure out what’s right for the best.

[boltnrun]

How is getting out of a toxic relationship considered a "failure"?

What would you consider a "success" in this situation?

[bluecastle]

I was going to say something similar to bolt.

I mean, what is your gauge of “failure” here? Relationships aren’t endurance tests where you “succeed” by withstanding more agony than the dude in the apartment downstairs. They’re things we opt into because we like someone, like who we are next to them, and have similar goals and values.

Personally, I think learning to let go of things that don’t serve you, are hurting you, weighing you down, and turning you into a version of yourself you don’t much like, is kind of the definition of “success.”

[Wiseman2]

Sounds like you're incompatible and now that she's got wedding fever you realize you don't want to get married.

We bought the ring together. She designed it herself, got it made, tried it on and witnessed the exchange of cash and she took it back to hers to show her mum, then gave it back for me to propose. I feel stupid for being a man and acting like this, but the battle is as real as it can be.