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Thread: Saddening ENA reviews

  1. #141
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
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    I find this discussion kind of creepy.

  2. #142
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    It is interesting that this thread started out as a gratuitous gripe session, dressed up as tragic and replete with a built in judge and jury of internet reviews. Then was spun as if a public service announcement and warning about how bad ena 'really' is. Then spun as a meeting to improve things, specifically hoping for a gag order on posters who recommend therapy or breaking up. Then spun as a professional learning experience. But now the verdict is 'limited humans' are allowed to have freedom of speech after all?
    I'm not sure where freedom of speech comes in. It's an internet forum that is moderated. People are free to type posts and respond to posts as long as the forum rules are followed. People are free not to post or contribute too. I don't and won't give professional advice even if my profession (whatever profession, I mean, generally) was consistent with the advice being asked for. I'm not limited in that sense -I simply know what I know and more importantly know what I don't know. So I share what I know -or genuinely believe I know - that I think will help, contribute, support, maybe make someone laugh or see the world differently -maybe - and what I know has nothing to do with any professional knowledge. I could see joining a forum geared to professional knowledge I might have. I personally wouldn't be interested and I wouldn't be interested in ENA if this was a site for professional knowledge. But that doesn't make me a limited human and it doesn't mean I have more or less "freedom of speech".

  3. #143
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by firelily
    Thanks for sharing your views on this.

    I think the reason why I'm so touched it's because I exprienced I kind of cognitive dissonance finding out that ENA got close to 1 star rating on these reviews sites with the % of negative reviews.
    There were only like four or five reviews though... Perhaps we forum members should all go over to the review page and give a more accurate representation about this site and explaining how the board has helped a hella lot more people then what is represented in the current reviews. Would that calm you more to read many good reviews? Most people who are grateful for the help don't go out of their way to post about it. I would be more in step with the amount of angst you feel about this if Enotalone had a "How Helpful Were The Responses To Your Thread" section at the end of each Opened thread and the reviews were mostly bad. Until then, perhaps you would do well to assume the best rather than focus on the reviews of a separate site that most people didn't even know about until you started this thread.

    The place seems imperfect but serving its use,
    Yes, just like anything that can be reviewed.
    and when you go to review pages you hear that this portal has a face of the monster pretending to be a helper,
    Really? Its hardly that gruesome and as previously suggested you take the few criticisms with a grain of salt. I quick cross reference from those reviews back to the site will quickly show you that you needn't worry the way you have been. No need to even be "saddened" by such reviews. You can't please all of the people all of the time. Even in professional practice.
    I don't think assuming all negatives come from mentally disturbed people is the answer to solve the dissonance,
    Well, no one said that all of the reviews are from mentally disturbed people... And I don't think that you should be taking a few bad critiques with such distress. The most putrid of the reviews comes from a person that clearly took offence to a posters opinion of her situation, she was apologised to for that opinion yet still couldn't just let it go. That, IMO is someone with some sort of issue if they can't let go the opinion of a stranger on the internet that can only go by what was shared in a opening post. The person she critiqued has helped many people with her never enabling advice. Same with the other person mentioned and there was no "monster" in their deliveries... only genuine attempts for the opening poster to get out of her own head and through to the other side of her tunnel vision of victimhood. The rest of the reviews were about not being able to delete threads and those that don't like to have to comply to certain rules of the site.

    but I'm closer to forming a multi-perspective opinion after this thread.
    Glad to hear it.
    Last edited by ThatwasThen; 10-18-2019 at 10:11 AM.

  4. #144
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    I think the purpose of this forum is to try -to try -to be a support/help for people who need advice. Emphasis on try. That is the goal. So if it doesn't help a particular person that person can choose not to post again. I never even knew there were reviews and it never occurred to me to check -even when I felt hurt by certain posts - and hurt even when the posts had nothing to do with me -just found them hurtful/offensive against others. But I know my recourse is to report if that's appropriate, to take a break, to PM the person if appropriate, and it never occurred to me to post a review even though I've posted reviews of restaurants, hotels, products, stores. Sure if someone wants to review ENA have at it -just never occurred to me to handle any negative experiences by reading reviews or posting one.

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  6. #145
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    @ Firefly: Thank you for a thread that has created a lively discussion and a chance to defend a pretty darn good site...
    (even if we can't curse *winkz*)

  7. #146
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    Just to be clear, what is the sample size of these reviews? Five? Fifteen? I go back to the dinner party metaphor, because I really think this site is far more like a dinner party than, say, a therapist's office.

    Fifteen people sit around the table. You are bound to not like them all, or be liked by all, and there is always that one person who tells the story of how a vacation was ruined because a waiter brought the wrong cocktail at the airport lounge before the plane even took off for Italy. Yeah, the Ritz was fine, and Florence was pretty, but that idiot waiteródude ruined it. And that person, when he talks about the dinner party? He talks about how the asparagus was overcooked and how no one let him say that thing he wanted to say. If only he had a forum in which to review that party, because you should see his takedown of the tape dispenser he ordered from Amazon. Scathing stuff.

    Meanwhile, the other 14 people had a good night. Some are now texting each other, some are happy to be done with each other. Others go home to finish their taxes, self-satisfied with the tape dispenser they bought after reading a scathing Amazon review of another they were considering. Go figure. Small, curious world.

    I don't mean to sound flip, but that's more or less what I see here, weekly, and more or less how I see reviews of anything: movies, books, websites, subconsciouses. Some people don't like the things I like. Some people don't like me. Does that mean I should stop liking that book, stop liking me? I hope not! Different means of getting by. Personally, I think you show true respect to those reviews, and the people who wrote them, by not giving them too much weight, meaning you don't let them shatter your own scales. Hey, opinionóI see you, I hear you, I appreciate you, but I'm not going to reframe my life around you.

    Kind of like what people do here, every day, best I can see.

  8. #147
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    I love anchovies. I love them on pizza. I ask for extra anchovies on my Caesar salad. Yummy.

    No one else I know likes anchovies. They hate them. They say terrible things about them, calling them disgusting, gross, sickening, some even claim they made them sick.

    I continue to eat and love anchovies. I don't let the "negative reviews" stop me.

    And I'm sure some negative reviews will not shut down this site or cause it to make radical posting rules like removing posts that are arbitrarily deemed to be "unkind" or "harsh".

  9. #148
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    Originally Posted by ThatwasThen
    @ Firefly: Thank you for a thread that has created a lively discussion and a chance to defend a pretty darn good site...
    (even if we can't curse *winkz*)
    :)) Yes! I wish there was some kind of online translator from curse to English lol.

  10. #149
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    Sorry, Firelily... just read that I called you "Firefly" by mistake. Duh, me!

  11. #150
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    Originally Posted by ThatwasThen
    Sorry, Firelily... just read that I called you "Firefly" by mistake. Duh, me!
    I think it was meant to be Firefly, but it was already taken, or something like that :)

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