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Thread: Where to meet women when in your thirties?

  1. #1
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    Where to meet women when in your thirties?

    Hello there!

    I'm feeling better each day. I'm getting into my old 'self' again, like I used to be some 10 years ago. More spontaneous, cheerful, motivated.

    This is all good. Now I don't feel like sitting at home anymore, behind the PC. Especially on these grey weather sundays ;)

    Why can't it be summer all year through! Anyway, I just don't know where to go to go out and meet women. I mean, I can think of a few things like going downtown at friday/saturday night, although I notice I'm getting too 'old' (lol) for this if you consider the ages of other people in the bars/cafťs.

    For my age category (age 34) it might be a bit more difficult to meet single women. Where do you all go to? To meet women. Or women; where do you go to meet single men ;)

    Of course you've got your dating apps, I tried many for a few months, but man, it's so incredibly discouraging. And I believe them when they say only the top 20% of men get all the attention due to the extreme ratio of men to women on dating apps and dating sites. All the apps (want to) do is squeeze you for money while you get nothing in return, not to mention the 'false' messages the app sends you multiple times a day to lure you back into the app and buy some shortcuts.

    So what to do then? I want to expand my chances of meeting someone because obviously sitting at home isn't going to do anything good for your odds.

    The issue might lie in the fact that I'm choosy with my interests. I like to create video games, graphic design, football (not american football).

    Perhaps others can shed some light on this. You should probably know I've had a bunch of dates in my life, but I never had a girlfriend. Almost all of my friends are also single and male, heheh.

  2. #2
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    In my 30s I met men through friends (set ups or just at casual gatherings) through work, volunteer work, professional networking organizations, singles events, on line dating sites, through religious organizations, in my apartment building, and while on vacation at singles resorts. I rarely went to a bar or club unless it was for a planned event. My longest relationship till age 39 was 7 years on and off -we were set up by my grad school classmate/his coworker. Started dating my future husband exclusively about a week before I turned 39.

  3. #3
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    Iím a 32 year old women and I wonder where to meet men also, going out as you said seems to be a lot of younger age bracket. I joined a meet up group for 25-40 year olds and met a guy there, he took me rock climbing on one date and I remember thinking that if you were single it would be a good way to meet someone, everyoneís really friendly and offers to hold your rope for you & itís not too awkward, unfortunately I canít do it because of my shoulder. Online dating sucks (as far as Iím concerned)

  4. #4
    Silver Member Rising100's Avatar
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    Im a man in my 30s and I suggest going out through friends. Expanding your social circle, being available for anything when friends call you and that way meeting other chicks.
    The problem I see some guys have is being too desperate and pursuing everyone woman that comes their way. In my opinion, making female friends works much better, you also get a group of women to choose from, like a menu.
    Online dating feels very weird to me, something about it is odd so yea, just my opinion. Hope that helps.

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  6. #5
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    Originally Posted by Batya33
    In my 30s I met men through friends (set ups or just at casual gatherings) through work, volunteer work, professional networking organizations, singles events, on line dating sites, through religious organizations, in my apartment building, and while on vacation at singles resorts. I rarely went to a bar or club unless it was for a planned event. My longest relationship till age 39 was 7 years on and off -we were set up by my grad school classmate/his coworker. Started dating my future husband exclusively about a week before I turned 39.
    To add, I never dated online. I used online dating sites as a way to meet people in person ASAP.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Ok you mentioned some valid obstacles, so address those one by one.
    1) Yeah picking up women in clubs is 20-something stuff, don't become a "Swingers" parody
    2) This is where you make great strides. take some classes and courses even stuff dominated by women, cooking, yoga, dancing etc. Volunteer and join some clubs and groups that both encompass and introduce you to new interests.
    3) Start talking to women, even if just as friends and have a few women friends. Also stay friends with couples, you never know who they know. Again don't become a parody of "Night At The Roxbury".
    Originally Posted by R85
    1)I can think of a few things like going downtown at friday/saturday night,
    2)The issue might lie in the fact that I'm choosy with my interests.
    3)Almost all of my friends are also single and male,

  8. #7
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    My best friends never frequented singles bars nor clubs. High quality women are NOT there!

    They met their significant others, boyfriends and husbands though mutual friends, family, church, various groups of interest such as sports / fitness, hobbies, academics, intellectual pursuits, work related clubs, excursion groups, community service / volunteerism, perhaps course work or a class and the like.

    If you want high quality women, you need to go where they are, what they're doing and where they tend to congregate. Don't isolate yourself.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    Join Meetups in your area. Join a club or group in whatever interests you. Join a local theatre group, take music lessons or join a band. Start a band. Night school for something interesting. Get together with friends in groups who are doing social things where you can meet other like minded people. Hanging out in bars is not the way to go.

    Volunteering is an excellent way to meet new people.

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