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Thread: About my bf's niece

  1. #11
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    You're right, it's none of your business. Her mother set up an appointment with a child psychologist.

    I hope this child will improve herself and become a decent human being. She sounds like a future murderer of humans. It's how Dahmer got his start; by killing and mutilating animals and getting his sick jollies out of it.

    It sounds like this child was physically and / or mentally abused to turn out like this.

  2. #12
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    No, this is most certainly not normal behaviour for a child. She needs professional help, and it appears her parents are arranging that.

    I am curious why you are asking about this, though. Does this affect your relationship in some way you haven't outlined here, or?

  3. #13
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    Originally Posted by MissCanuck
    No, this is most certainly not normal behaviour for a child. She needs professional help, and it appears her parents are arranging that.

    I am curious why you are asking about this, though. Does this affect your relationship in some way you haven't outlined here, or?
    Yes, same question and I agree. Are you concerned this type of behavior runs in the family and could affect your boyfriend?

  4. #14
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    She has two parents and they have already arranged a doctor's appt. What is the beef between you and your bf over this? Does your bf live in the same household?

    Why would you argue about this or discuss intervention, when it's not your call and obviously abnormal? Are you upset at your bf or his family or just doing some arm chair psychology?
    Originally Posted by OptimisticP
    My bf initially thought a long lecture would make the girl understand that animals can feel too. He started getting more worried when it didn't work.

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  6. #15
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by OptimisticP
    My bf and I have been dating for a year now. Perhaps this issue doesn't pertain to me as a 3rd party (maybe it's none of my business either) but would you be alarmed if a child behaved like his niece? Her mother just recently set up an appointment with a child psychologist for next week.

    We live around 20-30 away from the girl's mother. The girl doesn't smile too much except when doing bad things. I don't know too much about her other than what my bf has informed me so far. She's 8 years old and her parents have been divorced for nearly 5 years. She has gotten into a couple fights with her classmates at school last year and one just recently. These are a couple other things that happened recently starting somewhere in July or August.
    - She hurled small rocks at cats and kicked one, laughing
    - She threw a boy's hamster on the lake, watched it drown and laughed when the boy cried. That incident was dismissed because she claimed that she was just curious to see if it could swim.
    - She has cut off all the heads of her dolls and destroyed a couple toys. She doesn't play with them anymore.
    - She used a kitchen cleaver to cut several frogs' (some of them were big frogs) heads, rinses them with water, collects them on jars and took pictures.
    - She told my bf that it's fun chopping their heads and hurting things. My bf said she had a smile when telling him that.

    The issue has also been addressed to the girl's father. She visits him on the weekends. The guy thinks his daughter is just being a normal kid that's acting out, being rebellious, immature and it's just a stage she'll overcome soon. As an observant, I doubt this is common between children in general. I'm not sure what to think of this.
    My guess is you're shocked and upset and probably wondering if it runs in the family? Ok, jokes aside - no, it's not normal. I would be concerned over the child also and unsure about how the father is dealing with it. Don't try to lecture the child though or approach her if she has assessments on her in the process and has already drawn the concern of her mother. There is not much you can do. You CAN help the family however by refusing to chitchat about the family matter etc if it comes up in social get togethers or if it comes up in any sort of conversation. Be discreet of the matter and respectful of the family.

  7. #16
    Bronze Member MirrorKnight's Avatar
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    Sounds like she is a psychopath. Lacks empathy and enjoys the thrill of exerting power over weaker creatures.

    Around 1% of people are born that way, though the severity does vary, and most psychopaths learn that other people find certain behaviours distasteful or unacceptable and blend into the general population without much difficulty.

    The ones who become serial killers are those who never learn their boundaries or end up in positions of power where there is no inhibition on their worst excesses.

  8. #17
    Platinum Member maew's Avatar
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    Sounds like she is a psychopath. Lacks empathy and enjoys the thrill of exerting power over weaker creatures.
    Often the case with children that experience horrific abuse at the hands of a parent/relative/family friend. It's good that she is getting help with this... and while I understand that it might be shocking, gossiping about her behavior with strangers is inappropriate and unhelpful.

  9. #18
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    I certainly would be nervous having her around my children should I marry into the family so I can understand why you would want other opinions on this. It is very good that they are having her see a psychiatrist. Hopefully, she's young enough to be taught how to curtail her sociopathic/psychopathic behaviour BEFORE she starts hurting humans.

    Please update us on what her psychiatrist had to say once/if you find out more.

  10. #19
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    One out of 25 people are sociopaths. But to be honest, she sounds like a psychopath, which statically is rare for one to be a girl. Most likely a divorce at 3 caused a fracture in her life, and not all are born sociopaths, but become one from trauma.

    There's not real way to treat sociopaths. But if they have an incentive, they can find a way to work with them with managed incentives and rules. Just be polite and stay out of their way.

  11. #20
    Platinum Member Fudgie's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by tattoobunnie
    There's not real way to treat sociopaths. But if they have an incentive, they can find a way to work with them with managed incentives and rules. Just be polite and stay out of their way.
    Yeah, they do great in the military actually because of the structure and built in incentives and clear boundaries.

    Definitely remain polite but stay out of the way. Don't allow them into your personal life unless you want trouble or a big mess to clean up.

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