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Thread: How to deal with a friend like this?

  1. #1
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    How to deal with a friend like this?

    I've been noting some red flags about a particular friend. She always ignores my texts and usually her excuse is she's doing assignments. She is active on social media. Like I got a new phone on Thursday and sent her a message on Snap..she just opened. We usually text on Snapchat. She sent me a message, and I sent back. Just opened and didn't reply. She sent me an iMessage..sent back and it's been delivered since. She has not sent back, but always watches my stories and uploaded since then. Besides that, I have noted some of the comments she made. She always talks about I have a tiny waist, how I have a good group of friends, how I never have a shortage of guys - despite most of them being jerks. Usually I just overlook it. She has also said how she doesn't deserve me like twice. Is that also a red flag? And I also find myself mainly initiating plans. Should I just keep distance? We've been friends for a year.

    Like even last week, she was going thru a breakup. Sent money and gave advice..just to found thru Insta she was hanging with this same guy yesterday...and couldn't tell me
    Last edited by oheyitsfaith; 10-14-2019 at 11:18 AM.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Never buy friendship or send people money. Ever. It's best to have a very full life. That includes a lot of interests and activities as well as a number of friends who share those interests and activities. Join some clubs, groups, volunteer, etc. and make friends in real-life. This way whatever her response time is wouldn't even be noticed. Get off your phone, get out in real life more.

    If you think she is more of a frenemy, fade out like she is doing to you to create distance. Stop bombarding her with messages. She does not want to be glued to the phone or have to answer to all that. Get better friends and don't over text them to this degree. Never send money 💰😱
    Originally Posted by oheyitsfaith
    She always ignores my texts and usually her excuse is she's doing assignments.
    I got a new phone on Thursday and sent her a message on Snap..she just opened.
    Sent her message thru iMessage and it's been delivered since.
    I also find myself mainly initiating plans.
    Sent money and gave advice.

  3. #3
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Never buy friendship or send people money. Ever. It's best to have a very full life. That includes a lot of interests and activities as well as a number of friends who share those interests and activities. Join some clubs, groups, volunteer, etc. and make friends in real-life. This way whatever her response time is wouldn't even be noticed. Get off your phone, get out in real life more.

    If you think she is more of a frenemy, fade out like she is doing to you to create distance. Stop bombarding her with messages. She does not want to be glued to the phone or have to answer to all that. Get better friends and don't over text them to this degree. Never send money 💰😱
    Oh I do go out. Lol I meet people daily, and she is not the only friend I have. I didn't bombard her. She sent me a message on Snapchat. I sent back...didn't reply. She sent me a message on iMessage...sent back and didn't reply. I haven't sent anything since Thursday. And I got you. Will not do that again!

  4. #4
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    Are you friends or lovers? Stop analyzing if she responds right away. She sent a message and you sent one back. Sometimes she reads something but doesn't respond. So big deal. I don't understand what the big deal is. Just go do other things and when she gets back to you, she gets back to you

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  6. #5
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    Dont lend money, you wont likely get it back. Develop a life that does not include her. She is showing she's not interested in being friends with you.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    Whatever her deal is....she is NOT your friend. If I were you, I wouldn't invest anymore time or energy into it.

  8. #7
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    Originally Posted by smackie9
    Whatever her deal is....she is NOT your friend. If I were you, I wouldn't invest anymore time or energy into it.
    I agree with this. You've given her too many chances.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    Have you ever met this "friend" in person? It sounds like you're trying to conduct a friendship online instead of in person where you actually get to know one another.

    Why the heck would you send her money? Why not just give her the money if it was actually needed and you wanted to give it? Why "send" it? Why was money even necessary because she allegedly broke up with someone?

    ... I agree with everyone that mentioned that she's no friend and that you should back off from any contact with her.

  10. #9
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    She is not your friend, and why are you sending her money?

  11. #10
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    It doesn’t sound like you’ve met this girl in person...

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