Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 4 of 4 FirstFirst 1234
Results 31 to 36 of 36

Thread: Can we get back together at our age

  1. #31
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    24,247
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by Ecajan1973
    But what can I do about a 19 year old kid that refuses to live with his father at this time and has no one else to turn too
    Where is his mother and grandparents? 19 year old kids even without disabilities are dramatic and black and white and although he may say he has nobody -- he does. Legally he can be on his parents insurance for a few more years. They are still responsible for him. I would treat him like a non disabled team -- he has to be working and he has to contribute X much or he's out, and work with mom or grandparents or have a legal document served to the father

  2. #32
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2016
    Location
    Cloud Nine
    Posts
    35,496
    Gender
    Male
    Yes, it may be time to talk to him about living with a relative. He needs appropriate long term housing, not just a sympathetic pit stop.
    Originally Posted by abitbroken
    Where is his mother and grandparents?

  3. #33
    Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2019
    Posts
    21
    He has no mother, she left when he was a baby
    And he hasnít been officially diagnosed with autism.. itís actually in process of being diagnosed and trying to apply for resources for him
    I have no problem with him being here as long as he wants
    His father obviously doesnít either

    This kid has been abandoned so many times

    So unfair to him

    And his poor daughter going thru this also

  4. #34
    Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2019
    Posts
    21
    he has health insurance and is currently in a job placement program

  5.  

  6. #35
    Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2019
    Posts
    21
    His father is his only family
    No grandparents or anything
    Just his father
    And his father said he can stay here

    So I feel my hands are tied

    I just donít have heart to throw him out

  7. #36
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Posts
    24,247
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by Ecajan1973
    His father is his only family
    No grandparents or anything
    Just his father
    And his father said he can stay here

    So I feel my hands are tied

    I just donít have heart to throw him out
    Its not up to his dad.
    Honestly, i would treat him like loving foster parents treat a foster child who is aging out. Get him geared towards moving on - he has the job program - he needs to conntribute to the household to learn how to budget even if you end up giving him half that money as a gift when he moves out (not telling him now that's what you are doing), work towards finding a roommate or a room for rent within the next X amount of time or if he is eligible for housing depending on how severe his autism is. Don't just dump him on the porch - transition him. not fair for you to be saddled with him. Its not about abandonment issues - its about him transitioning to an adult. Make a 6 month or 1 year or 1 1/2 year plan that progresses with each step. And make it a hard deadline.

Page 4 of 4 FirstFirst 1234

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •