Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12
Results 11 to 16 of 16

Thread: Irritated a guy who blew me off rudely is doing well. Any advice to get over it?

  1. #11
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2013
    Location
    Wilds of Texas
    Posts
    10,063
    Gender
    Female
    Agree with the you are way overreacting and blowing this completely out of proportion in a kind of vindictive manner, which says more about you and your own character.

    He has been wanting to teach classes there, you claim to have been supportive, yet the moment he got that chance, you selfishly scream about how dare he "blow you off". He didn't blow you off. He kept you informed about what's going on, he maintained steady contact, he was honest with you. When he contacted you early in the morning about making plans, YOU waited until afternoon to finally respond...how ironic. He responded in kind and yes, 6 weeks is nothing, fam comes first. You pitched a tantrum, were rude yourself, you are posting with this huge sense of entitlement and .... your own behavior is far from stellar...... You are behaving like quite a diva and it's not attractive and won't be attractive to any decent guy. Wish you luck dating, you'll be needing it.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2019
    Location
    British Columbia, Canada
    Posts
    2,920
    Gender
    Female
    Take a few days to be pissed off if you are and then put it firmly behind you. Don't respond to any of his texts going forward. If you're this irritated with each other so early, I can't imagine what dating would be like. I don't suggest letting it show or paying him any attention at the gym either. Just remain cordial and friendly like you would with the receptionist. Don't bother asking how he's doing either. He's a waste of time at this time and he is busy with his new job and coworkers. Let him be. Keep it light and any conversations in person short if you run into each other.

  3. #13
    Platinum Member maew's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2017
    Posts
    1,735
    I would say it's less about being him being purposely disrespectful and more that this guy is really just building a life for himself and wants to focus on that... and was hoping for something less serious and more casual with you while he does that.

    I understand you being annoyed at his being flaky... I get annoyed by that too, even if it's for good reason... however staying annoyed with someone you have known for what amounts to a hot minute only drains your energy and allows your ego to run the show.

    Chalk it up to experience and that you two aren't compatible in terms of what you want from a relationship... perhaps consider finding someone that is a little more established in their life and career so they have more time for dating.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2002
    Posts
    2,034
    This situation perfectly illustrates how texting (social media in general) has both dehumanized our interactions and made us all way too impatient for response.

    Maybe you don't have to wait sitting by the hall phone as my mom may have done. But you cannot expect instant response either.

    And NOBODY prevented you from calling him on the phone, texting, or even dropping by to find out what's what. Or, when getting no response in the timeframe you like, then do something else!

    And further, do not consider time alone as wasting a perfectly good weekend. Time for introspection is good.

    Chilling at home alone with a box of Oreos, milk of your preference, and binge-watching streaming media.

    Some days I'd "kill" for doing nothing!

  5.  

  6. #15
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2016
    Posts
    9,370
    Good heavens, OP.

    You are one tense chick. I agree with the others that have said you are over-reacting. Are you normally this on edge and defensive with men? It seemed to take very little to set you off and usually there is some leftover resentment coming from somewhere else that triggers that.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    New Jersey
    Posts
    22,458
    Gender
    Female
    My heart goes out to you, because somewhere you picked up that a minor disappointment equals hostile disrespect, and you should trash a relationship over that.

    Sometimes people ask for a raincheck over something that's important to them. The guy trusted you to understand the importance of this given that you've been supportive of his goal. He stayed plugged in with you, he asked to make this up to you the very next morning--but how long would you expect him to keep his calendar open for you without a reply?

    I'd be less trigger-happy with the indignation when it comes to people who presumably matter to you, or you'll find yourself very lonely and bitter far into your future. How about giving the guy a break, apologizing for anything snide you may have said, and invite him out to celebrate his new accomplishment so that you can enjoy it for him and with him, rather than isolate yourself over it?

    Head high, and recognize when giving someone else a break also means giving one to yourself.

Page 2 of 2 FirstFirst 12

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •