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Thread: Shock from being ghosted

  1. #51
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    So she called me last night. I really didnt expect that because we only meeting on friday. Anyway, I missed her call cause I was on another call with an old fling (please dont judge, Im trying to distract myself). I tried to call back but she never picked up... things are getting dramatic. I dunno whats going on but the meeting will be very interesting...

  2. #52
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    I think “dramatic” is the goal here, the thing you’re seeking. No judgement, just how it looks from these seats.

  3. #53
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    Originally Posted by TheG
    So she called me last night. I really didnt expect that because we only meeting on friday. Anyway, I missed her call cause I was on another call with an old fling (please dont judge, Im trying to distract myself). I tried to call back but she never picked up... things are getting dramatic. I dunno whats going on but the meeting will be very interesting...
    You keep proving to her that you're just sitting there waiting and hoping she contacts you.

    It's just not an attractive look.

    I guess whatever happens at this "meeting" might shed some light on her mindset. Or not.

  4. #54
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    Guys i really like her and Im putting up with all this because shes been very open to me, from up-bringing to past relationships. Iv never fallen in love before, Iv got intimacy issues and Iv told her. She told me that she finds that scary cause it means I wont fight for a relationship when things get hard... So thats what im dong now. Im taking this as her being the weaker vessel. Im swallowing my pride. If she didnt call yesterday I would have kept quiet until d-day giving her the space she needs. She didnt pick up so i guess I must give her that space again...

    PS typing this while listening to Nayan · FATOUMATA DIAWARA

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  6. #55
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    I hear you. Ride the waves until you catch one or get tired paddling.

    Sounds like you see in her a “vessel” to work through some stuff, experiment with shedding those intimacy issues. Fair enough.

    Just food for thought: an intimate connection that feels like a battle to maintain or a carrot on a stick, or that’s built by confessions of intimacy issues from the get go, is sometimes a kind of intimacy that just fuels the very issues you’re hoping it will erase.

    See her when you see her and see what’s up. Doesn’t have to be rocket science, just like two missed calls don’t need to be labeled dramatic. People miss calls. Infuse everything with 12 meanings and you lose the thread.

  7. #56
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    Originally Posted by bluecastle
    Just food for thought: an intimate connection that feels like a battle to maintain or a carrot on a stick, or that’s built by confessions of intimacy issues from the get go, is sometimes a kind of intimacy that just fuels the very issues you’re hoping it will erase.
    This is spot-on.

    What you're doing here OP is engaging in something that will not solve your issues, but only serve to perpetuate them. This isn't what the beginning of a healthy relationship looks like.

  8. #57
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    So she unblocked me and I didnt engage with her much. I carried on with my life. Awaiting her to call me regarding the meeting. Then she blocked me again... I think I now understand whats going on. She doesn't feel the love from me and I do agree with her if she feels that way. I so badly wanted to engage with her but was waiting for her to greet first as she said I must wait for her call and not call her. I think I messed this one up by not allowing myself to be vulnerable in this case obviously she also has insecurity issues as well...But i feel like I can still fix this. Me holding my feelings back was not what I wanted to do...

  9. #58
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    Its hard but I dont think Iv tried my best yet...

  10. #59
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    Ultimately i think my intaimacy issues were starting to show and scared her away...

  11. #60
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    What is it you want from her and this situation? Reflect on that and pursue it one way or the other. End it and date less flaky women or embrace this and go for it. Hovering around in this confusing block/unblock, ignore/engage, breakup/makeup two step is wasting your time and playing guessing games. You could be with women who want you when you choose to stop this madness.
    Originally Posted by TheG
    So she unblocked me and I didnt engage with her much. Awaiting her to call me regarding the meeting. Then she blocked me again.

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