What’s gong to happen now?

[Disnoticed]

My friend and I are extremely shy, but last night we finally gained some confidence and admitted our feelings for one another. We want to date, and we feel as if it could be worth it— the issue is we live a couple states apart. We spent 2 or so hours on the phone talking about it, but he had to go to work. He promised he’d call me after work, today. I have no idea if he’s going to make it official or say it’s best if we don’t... i’m nervous as hell! I guess what i’m wondering, readers, is what do you think he is going to say? If we do make it official how tough is it going to be?

And yes, we’ve met in person and have known each other for about a year and a half, now.

[TeeDee]

We have no idea what he's going to stay. Best I can guess is that he will say kind, nice things. If you live a couple of states away it will be tough. First step should be a get together. When can you arrange that?

[MissCanuck]

What's your history with him?

I mean, when and how did you meet? How often do you talk?

[Disnoticed]

We were planning on meeting up in the spring/summer so it’s a little far off. We’ve just heard so many long distance horror stories that we’re kinda afraid to get into it I guess. I talk to him daily, we video call like 3 times a week. He used to live down here but moved away, we’ve stayed friends over the distance

[TeeDee]

Since you know each other, step up the time table to meet.

LDR is doable but you need a plan to close the distance. Is he willing to come back?

[MissCanuck]

Meeting in the spring is too far off if you two want to make a go of this. That would need to happen a lot sooner if you two want to hold on to this bond you're developing.

You can certainly make it clear that you are willing to try, as you like him and would be happy to explore this connection and see where things go. Hear him out, whatever it is he has to say. I would go in to this conversation with no expectations, as logistics would understandably make this difficult, but listen to how he feels.

What was the impression you got from him last night? What did he say during that conversation about his feelings for you?

[Andrina]

You still didn't explain how you met. Did he say he was from your area and met up with you once because you met on OLD? Did you meet somewhere in your town, go out once or twice, and then he moved two states away? How old are you two? What is his relationship history? Do both of you lack the money to meet up every few months? Who was planning on visiting who next year? Just trying to get a better picture of this scenario.

[ThatwasThen]

We were planning on meeting up in the spring/summer so it’s a little far off.

What a great way to keep you in a committed relationship that you won't be able to enjoy. You will be restricted to all the rules and regs of a partnership while you are actually unable to enjoy all the benefits of being single. What on earth is the point of that?

What are the chances of you both moving to be in the same district as one another and when would that be?

We’ve just heard so many long distance horror stories that we’re kinda afraid to get into it I guess.

And so you should be if there is little to no chance of you moving to be with one another in the very near future.

I talk to him daily, we video call like 3 times a week.

Not half as good as being close enough to smell his scent, touch him, kiss him, hug him, have fun while in the same personal space.

He used to live down here but moved away, we’ve stayed friends over the distance

Friends? Why weren't you lovers too when you actually had the chance?

[smackie9]

TBH stop worrying about everything. Just take it one day at a time and see where it goes. Trying to plan this and that and wondering what if, is just taking away from the romance that is about to bloom. Just enjoy it!

[JamesDE]

I agree with smakie9. Your curiosity roots from hope, leading to ideas of how it will go, risking expectations not being met. You're shy, maybe this is new, maybe not, but if you are not shy with him, let let it happen naturally. If he takes you out of your shell, you will know within yourself how he feels.

Good luck, let us know.