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Thread: Creating more boundaries and disentangling my life from hers

  1. #51
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
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    Right?! It is ridiculous . There is a total housing crisis. I am lucky to be living in military housing in a way. At least I have a place to live . But they just did a ďrent studyď so they can charge me more for my dilapidated piece of crap .
    Originally Posted by smackie9
    It's already happening here in Vancouver...people living in the streets, old RVs parked everywhere. We pay the most for gas in the world...we are so taxed to death. a small 2 bedroom basement suite is 2000+ a month.....but that is if you can find one. There are almost no rentals. My dilapidated 55 year old house in worth over 800K and that's lower from the almost 1 mil 2 years ago.

  2. #52
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
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    And when people are faced with not enough necessities of life everybody becomes out for themselves . And as J says money is actually the root of all evil. Truth it is.

  3. #53
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
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    I did send her a message today to say I was thinking of her today. Her eldest daughter was born stillborn today 46 years ago . She was full term.

  4. #54
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    She sounds like she acts very entitled.

    its one thing to include lunch as part of the deal for a low income worker, its different to enable them by paying her taxes.
    I think its fine if you want to go to scary movies with her. And if you get her in free because you have a discount card, only go when you want to treat. But change the Netflix password. I know it doesn't cost anything for her to be on it, but its the principle of it. She will never know you cancelled. And ABSOLUTELY do not pay her taxes.

    I would tell her that she is not needed on X days per week because she needs someone who can be there the whole day.
    And i would not pay her for the hours she is not there.

    I think you have other capacities to make friends. Friends come in all sizes and ages. You could start a horror movie viewing meetup group that meets once a month for a movie and a coffee discussion after a matiness.

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  6. #55
    Platinum Member itsallgrand's Avatar
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    I would cut her off so quick her head would spin.
    People like J grind my gears. She will always present herself as this victim of circumstance, but truth is, she makes bad choices and expects others to accomodate that. A bit of entitlement, a bit of self pitying, and a whole lot of playing on other people's sympathies.
    I wonder if her eldest just didn't get sick of her mom trying to sponge off her.

  7. #56
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    Originally Posted by itsallgrand
    I would cut her off so quick her head would spin.
    People like J grind my gears. She will always present herself as this victim of circumstance, but truth is, she makes bad choices and expects others to accomodate that. A bit of entitlement, a bit of self pitying, and a whole lot of playing on other people's sympathies.
    I wonder if her eldest just didn't get sick of her mom trying to sponge off her.
    Actually her eldest is a leech. Her mom gave her 3,000 her entire savings when she came home to re establish herself with her husband and kids after Greece tanked. She didnít talk to her mom for 6 months because her mom told her that her husband was a lazy ass which he is . And she never paid her mom back .

    But I do think I am being taken advantage of a bit .

  8. #57
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    Originally Posted by itsallgrand
    I would cut her off so quick her head would spin.
    People like J grind my gears. She will always present herself as this victim of circumstance, but truth is, she makes bad choices and expects others to accomodate that. A bit of entitlement, a bit of self pitying, and a whole lot of playing on other people's sympathies.
    I wonder if her eldest just didn't get sick of her mom trying to sponge off her.
    I will be busting my ass like no tomorrow now.

  9. #58
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    I like the upfront approach - tell her you canít afford it and youíve changed the settings on your membership. You donít have to say a word about your password. Use your discretion and donít volunteer so much.

  10. #59
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    Originally Posted by ~Seraphim ~
    I will be busting my ass like no tomorrow now.
    Itallgrand, made some valid points. it is time to stop enabling and make some positive changes for yourself. You are part of the problem. The bit with the taxes and her hours is outrageous. Stop!

  11. #60
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    I know I am but I have to be careful how things impact my daycare kids. They love her to death.
    Originally Posted by Hollyj
    Itallgrand, made some valid points. it is time to stop enabling and make some positive changes for yourself. You are part of the problem. The bit with the taxes and her hours is outrageous. Stop!

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