I think this is one of those things better revisited in the light of the following day and subsequent days after. I agree with nutbrownhare on the alcohol (I would have limited it and not encouraged her to drink). She wasn't doing well with the alcohol that night.

I'm sensing deep distrust and dislike for the people around you and some resentment still towards some of the people in your town. Maybe it's a good idea to let all those things go and not hold on to the past so tightly. Both you and her together seem to support each other in a way that is both unhealthy and nurturing of the negative past. Instead of seeing the bad in others, why don't both of you see the good? That lady's ranting seems a bit comical to be honest. Learn to laugh at the dis-invitation or whatever that was. Have your own tea party or barbeque. It's not that sinister. Both of you or you seem to want to keep competing with the rest of the town or the immature antics of one slighted woman. Why are neither of you confident enough to have your own soiree? Turn it into something devilish and fantastic at the same time. You can even call it whatever you want. When you said starts with a "w", all I could think about was "witch" (not the other thing you were referring to) and I can think of a lot of good things related to witches. Don't be afraid to get creative.

I'd take this with a grain of salt, learn to laugh more, celebrate more, strengthen each other more. Fester less, complain less, break each other down less. Grow stronger in your friendship together in a better way.