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Cold showers


SherrySher

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On my news feed a story in the Sun and on Yahoo, recently came out that a Youtube family was giving their 2 year old child a cold shower as punishment for toilet training issues.

 

There has now been a petition started on change.org to investigate this family for child abuse.

 

In previous videos from years before, their older daughter has hinted at cold showers as punishment, making one wonder if this was done to all the children. (they have 4).

 

What are your thoughts on this? Is this child abuse? Should this family be investigated or have their channel shut down?

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It seems excessive. I understand different parents do have different ways of parenting but this is too much. Extreme methods of punishment don't solve issues effectively.

 

Attacks (unforeseen onslaughts) on an individual's physical body or space or mental gymnastics (mind games) destabilize a child's ability to place him/herself in their environment and I think what ends up happening is the cycle repeats itself as that individual hasn't learned how to properly assess his/her environment.

 

What it does is create an environment of fear and fear-based responses are not reliable responses in the long term (mental/emotional instability).

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Someone should give the parents cold showers and see how they like it. Kids are toilet trained at different ages and stages in their lives. My daughter took a long time to reach the dry pants stage, my son was very quick. Daughter was never punished. Also, a 2 yr old's anatomy is not ready for the rigours of learning toilet training, their little bodies are growing and changing every day and not at the same rate as the next kid.

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Someone should give the parents cold showers and see how they like it. Kids are toilet trained at different ages and stages in their lives. My daughter took a long time to reach the dry pants stage, my son was very quick. Daughter was never punished. Also, a 2 yr old's anatomy is not ready for the rigours of learning toilet training, their little bodies are growing and changing every day and not at the same rate as the next kid.

 

I agree! My Son had issues after his Mother divorced me. Even though he was potty trained, he insisted on wearing pull-ups. We just allowed him to come around at his own pace.

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I'd be more than happy to dunk both parents' heads into an ice bath.

 

There's no excuse in 2019 not to be the most basic level of knowledge of child development. I very regrettably remember someone coming onto these forums spanking her two-year old son because he apparently was going wild with his bubble vacuum specifically to spite her. He wasn't. Nor was this woman's daughter ****ing herself out of defiance. When it comes to matters that don't actually render an intrinsic or intuitive harm, toddlers aren't bright enough to put together, "I shouldn't do this, but I'm going to anyway." As gross as crapping your pants is, there's no reason for a two-year old to piece together that it's bad. Additionally, she's only two. I get it's ideal they have it over with by three, but what the **** is the rush? In the most urgent of cases, they'll need her potty-trained to get into a preschool. It's not the end of the world if they'll have to wait until she's 3 and has much more of an ability to grasp positive and negative reinforcement.

 

Tried to look up the video and found one edited by someone else. They found a clip from two years ago of the nanny asking "warm bath or shower tonight?" and the mom very audibly thinking before responding, "warm shower, I think." It's very obvious they've been using cold showers to punish their kids for years. Obviously I'm not saying the kids would be better off if CPS took them away tomorrow, but that's pretty ****ed up.

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Someone posted a clip from two years ago where the oldest was then 4 and she was telling her dad that her doll was being naughty and he said something about "what do you do to naughty kids?"

 

She answered..."put them in a cold shower" :(

 

I just don't know how someone can have the heart to do that to their own child.

 

I've never seen anything like that come out in online media. (I don't watch many families online or reality tv). I just don't know what to make of all of it. It boggles my mind.

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As a general fyi, a cold shower isn't inherently abusive. In fact, there are many scientific studies that show the tremendous health benefits of taking a cold shower rather than a warm one, everything from muscle recovery and development to immune system strength. Reason I'm pointing this out is so people don't knee jerk on the concept of a cold shower at large.

 

That said....what these particular people are doing is hands down abuse and crossing into sadistic behavior. I sincerely hope that the petition works and they have their children taken away. This is coming from someone who generally believes that bad parents are still often better than kids being dragged through assorted foster homes.....but these poor children are going to be damaged either way and foster seems to be a lesser evil in this case. These people are disordered beyond words.

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What bothers me the most, is how their viewers are handling it. They are justifying it, telling them they support them and that it's "not that bad".

 

Hardly anyone is paying attention to this story and most are looking the other way.

 

It truly does make me sad for these children. Money really does seem to help people get away with many things.

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Terrible especially to punish for toilet training issues!! Also young children's skin/bodies I think tend to be more sensitive -or can be- to temperature issues. Our toilet training experience was horrible for us and stressful but we never punished ever or withheld privileges even. We did bribe and reward/reinforce as needed but it's terrible for a child to associate these bodily functions with punishment to her body!

 

I read what Itsallgrand wrote with interest- I guess it would depend on what else is going on in the home and where they live, all of that sort of thing. I'm no expert.

 

The other issue - having a child be under water can trigger the child to pee suddenly -so now she's had another "accident" and .... sigh. (I know this only anecdotally from a babysitting experience -older sister poured orange juice over younger sister's head who reacted by peeing on top of the OJ puddle....sigh -and of course the typical "I have to go" by a child who is in the pool.).

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Batya, they have 4 children and from previous videos, like jman, said...it looks like they've been using this as a punishment for their other children too when they misbehaved, not just the toilet training.

 

From how it looks, if one of their children misbehaves, they march them off to the cold shower or threaten with it.

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What kind of morons would make videos of this type of thing and post it on YouTube? Why not hit the report button on the YouTube menu for this video? YouTube is featuring it which is almost as reprehensible as the content.

a Youtube family was giving their 2 year old child a cold shower as punishment for toilet training issues. .Should this family be investigated or have their channel shut down?
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They are quite big Youtubers and have made lots of money making videos, which is unfortunate given how they seem to treat their children.

 

I don't think they find this wrong. They literally told everyone they were doing this to their child. There was a news article about it in The Sun and on Yahoo, but truth be told, no one seems to care, as they still have thousands of followers.

 

I think they are going to continue making videos and not be held accountable.

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Making a choice to take a cold shower, is much different than being forced into a cold shower. Being forced to take a cold shower is indeed, abusive. It borders on torture.

 

Punishment for toileting issues never works, in fact it can backfire and create even more delays in being toilet trained. Sadly, "parental" anger about toileting issues often results in child abuse leading to death. I belong to a "crime-solving" forum and I read about these types of cases way too frequently.

 

If these people are abusing their kids on video, imagine the abuse that isn't being viewed!!! Terrible

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Batya, I wished that were true. :( But no, they admitted that they did this to their 2 year old. They don't feel it's wrong, they feel it's just another parental technique for different childhood issues.

 

But in previous videos you can get the gist that they've used this "technique" on their other children for "naughty" behavior.

 

It made me ill. How can someone ever consider doing this to their little one? :(

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