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How do i know if she wants to settle down or use me for springboard to greencard


lioil

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I met this girl online and we have had good chat which i felt was pretty good.

 

One thing is she's in another country. She works as a secretary back in her home country and her english is not very good. She does want to settle down and dont mind going to school to learn english/skills.

 

My sister is more cynical and is worried i might be used as a springboard - we marry, divorce and she gets her green card. We are not at that point now but i do want to know earlier than later.

 

is there any way to find out? or is it just more interaction with her to find out? My mom says if we are married have couple of kids then if she leaves its still fine lol... Thanks!

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Unless you are on a foreign bride site on purpose, you're being scammed or catfished. You haven't even met. You seem to keep pursuing foreign brides. Is there a reason for that? Is this women the same culture as you? Is it the norm in your culture to be set up with a women from your home country and bring them to your country to marry?

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I agree with your sister. You have your head in the clouds if you think this woman might not be using you to get into your country, it happens all the time. They'll profess undying love to you in hopes you find a way to get them to your home town and marry them and then all hell breaks loose. She's conned you and now you are stuck paying for her if you sponsored her to get to your place. You are liable for her bills. People are often not who they are say they are.

 

Your mom has her head in the sand if grandchildren are produced, their mother takes off, and you are left holding the proverbial bag. Find a woman who lives near you, not some random person on the end of the computer screen in a foreign country.

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It seems your quest for a Chinese bride has been going on quite a while. Can you enlist a matchmaker who can set you up with local Chinese women?

01-17-2015:

 

So i have been introduced to this girl who is the daughter of my friend's best friend. She is in Australia but chinese and i am here in the states. By the way she is decently educated with degrees from decent university in australia. Her family is pretty rich so i think those characteristics should dispel any notion of her trying to marry into us citizenship or whatever. She is definitely a catch if she were in US and from her and her parents she just wants to settle down given her age.

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When a U.S. citizen marries a foreigner, an affidavit has to be signed that they will be financially responsible for the person for 10 years, even if it ends in divorce. A fiancé visa will also not be approved if they look at your finances and see that your salary can't meet the requirement of supporting another person besides yourself.

 

A lot of people are dumb to these facts, and it shocks me how little research they do when considering such a risky endeavor.

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If you are so concerned about being a "springboard," then why do you seek a foreign bride? You have been posting about the same thing for four years. I don't get it?! Your methods are not working.

 

Aren't there any foreign women in your city who have citizenship? Why are you seeking women you have not met, and who don't live on the other side of the world. There are so many Chinese women living in the States.

 

Are you Chinese?

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Are your family forcing or arranging marriage? Perhaps you don't want to get married but don't want to tell your family why? Could this be why you seek out these impossible situations?

 

I could be wrong, but I do not think the Chinese practice arranged marriage. It was outlawed after the revolution.

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If you are not sure about a person and also don't know how to be sure about a person, the idea about having this person in your life is not a good idea.

 

Let go of this and start asking yourself questions about how you can date locally. If you are generally unappealing or unable to find dates, now is a good idea to ask why and bridge that gap.

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I did mention this before as well, Lioil. Now isn't the best time to be bringing someone over from another country.

 

What I mean is, your chances are very slim of it working. You would need to prove a long term relationship that is actual love and it would need to be verified by family members and friends on both sides.

You'd also need at least a minimum of one year of this relationship to have been going on and at least 1-2 visits in real life. The person you were bringing over would have to pass an English test, etc. Even then there is no guarantee of your application being approved.

 

Immigration has become a lot more stricter. The days of finding someone online and bringing them over within a few months when you hardly know them...is long over.

 

Nevermind that you see who's in the office right now and he's not allowing many into the country at all.

 

You need to be more realistic, Lioil. This endeavor would be very pricey (on your part) and would have to be proven before your spousal application had a chance.

 

Find a forum for immigration applications/spousal applications and learn more information and read people's actual experiences with this.

 

I think you will get an eye opener on the realities going on right now.

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Lioil, this is many posts you've made now about brides from overseas.

 

Why didn't you take people's advice and try to find someone in your own country?

 

I'm going to go out on a limb here... but I suspect the OP does not do well meeting women or developing relationships in the real world, therefore he is twitter-pated when a woman from overseas shows an interest. This is how people get scammed. Meeting a woman on-line who lives overseas is nothing more than a scam. Stop and think about it, does it seem normal to you OP?

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Are you expected to marry a Chinese woman from China or can you marry a local woman of Chinese culture/heritage? Ask your matchmakers if they will seek locally for you instead of fix you up with all these intercontinental long-shots. Do you pay these matchmakers or are they friends, family and other intermediaries?

I am ready to settle down and through a good friend I was setup with another person from another country (china) and she's willing to come here to get married if we are compatible. Her family approves in terms of my background and they would like me to go to their country and they can host me there to meet me in person.

I would not say this is "arranged marriage" but in between since it is through mutual friend and the starting point of relationship is marriage in mind so any considerations are around that.

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