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Thread: Does anyone else feel like their sexuality comes up a lot in conversation?

  1. #1
    Gold Member Nebraskagirl14's Avatar
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    Does anyone else feel like their sexuality comes up a lot in conversation?

    Iím a very open person and even living in the Midwest, I have no problem talking about being gay like itís part of my normal life because it is. However, with some friends with whom I feel really comfortable, I find that it tends to work its way into the conversation without any intention on my part to do so. It just seems that there is always a funny anecdote or something that I want to share and then I leave the conversation feeling like I hope they donít think I ALWAYS have to talk about being gay. Iím not asking because anyone has said anything about it.

    This probably comes back to me caring too much what people think of me.

    On the positive side, it has brought a level of normalcy to it for friends of mine that are either questioning their sexuality or havenít been exposed to a lot of gay people and so that has been good. Iím not really sure what my question is but I guess I donít want people to think Iím always talking about being gay. Iím not sure why.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member mustlovedogs's Avatar
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    Thereís no reason your sexuality should be a large talking point. If youíre talking about a partner or something, thatís fine. But if youíre constantly discussing how you identify, it will get old very quickly.

    Can you explain what you mean more?

    Youíre more than someone whoís gay. You have hobbies. Passions. Work.

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    What do you say? Can you give some examples?

    I too, do not understand why it comes into the convo. I have always had gay friends and they have not felt the need to always include something something about being gay into the convo. I don't feel the need to do it being straight.

    I think that when we feel the need to to do this, it makes us appear different. I hope that we have come further.

  4. #4
    Gold Member Nebraskagirl14's Avatar
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    Does anyone else feel like their sexuality comes up a lot in conversation?

    Well, of course I talk about all of that too. Work and the rest of my life. First of all, if you are straight, the world revolves around your sexuality and so that point makes no sense to me. An example would be, aside from all of the other parts of the conversation that I either make a reference to someone I know (like another friend). For example, today, I made a reference to another gay friend of mine and her girlfriend and how her girlfriend knew that I was gay right away before I even said. That kind of thing. As you can seem from my photo, I donít ďlookĒ gay according to what society thinks and so most people donít know and that always surprises some friends of mine. They wonder, how do people know just from looking at you?

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  6. #5
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    My world does not revolve around my sexuality.

    I think that you may believe this may be an issue for you; otherwise, you would not have created this thread.

  7. #6
    Gold Member Nebraskagirl14's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Hollyj
    My world does not revolve around my sexuality.

    I think that you may believe this may be an issue for you; otherwise, you would not have created this thread.
    No. My world also does not revolve around my sexuality but it is part of who I am in a mostly straight world.

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    Originally Posted by Nebraskagirl14
    No. My world also does not revolve around my sexuality but it is part of who I am in a mostly straight world.
    You are right. I don't know how it is for you in Nebraska? I live in NYC, and so things may be different. But, I do not see any reason for folks to be bringing up their sexuality on a regular basis, unless there is talk about dating and trying to meet people.

  9. #8
    Gold Member Nebraskagirl14's Avatar
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    I agree and I donít feel like itís the main topic of my conversations, but I always feel weird when I make references to it with straight people.

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    I think it depends how it flows in the convo. Like any topic.

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    I think you just tell anecdotes that unavoidably include your sexuality but somehow and because of society stigma,you feel like you are always bringing up your sexuality to any conversation but it is not like you are saying "hello I am gay and I want you to know I am gay". For example,straight people would never question themselves if they are all the time talking about their sexuality,and indeed they do. Girls or boys or the world in general always talk about love or romantic relationships,which most of them are straight relationships,but they don't feel like you do and as I said I think you feel like that because of the 'social stigma'. I have friends (female friends) who often talk about boys and who they like or their past relationships and of course they don't feel like they are pointing out their sexuality. I hope I had made myself clear

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