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Thread: Would it be stupid if I reach out for him now?

  1. #11
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    Not sure if you read my post, but I don't think it's stupid to reach out to someone who once meant something to you, and still does.

    Any why is he a loser?

    I think there was an attraction, perhaps still is, but missed opportunities on both sides.

    He finally told you he had a gf but would never cheat on her, even though a part of him wanted to.

    This hardly makes him a loser. To the contrary, it makes him human and reflects integrity.

    Jmo of course, but nonetheless don't ever think that reaching out to someone you still care about is "stupid."

    Good lord, what has this world come to when we're discouraged from expressing a thought, feeling or kindness for fear of it being considered "stupid."

    Even if the result wasn't what you hoped it would be, it's still not stupid.

  2. #12
    Platinum Member ThatwasThen's Avatar
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    Personally I DO think it would be stupid and hinted at that in my first post while saying why it would be. However we all have our own opinions and I respect yours, Kat. :)

  3. #13
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    Originally Posted by ThatwasThen
    Personally I DO think it would be stupid and hinted at that in my first post while saying why it would be.

    However we all have our own opinions and I respect yours, Kat. :)
    Thnx T, I respect yours too.

    And everyone's even though I often disagree.

    Hope everyone has a good evening. :)

  4. #14
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    Originally Posted by katrina1980
    Thnx T, I respect yours too.

    And everyone's even though I often disagree.

    Hope everyone has a good evening. :)
    I think she would be playing with fire. Clearly, there is flirting/attraction and it could somewhere if they met up. Also, he lives in another country, and they don't really know one another. It's not like he is a longtime friend.

    I think it's best to leave it be.

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  6. #15
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    ThatwasThen
    I know it sounds like " you block me so now I wanna chase you" but that's not the case. Times when he contacted me I was hurt, then I had a boyfriend, and the last time my ex was still trying to fix things between us. It was not the right time. My interpretation of that was just that I still cross his mind.

    Katrina
    thank you for your posts, in my 20's I know I'm a na´ve and idealistic person and the world isn't a nice place, that's why I have to ask for stranger's opinions about my life now, but I'm learning haha.
    Anyway, I think I'm going to wait few more weeks to feel better about myself and figure out what I want from him before I contact him (and if I'm still sure to want it).
    In the worst case, it wouldn't be so good for my pride but I'll survive it. I'm 100% sure I don't want to be his girlfriend for now anyway. And as I know him a little bit better I'll be careful.

    Thanks again for all your answers.
    Last edited by yasu; 08-16-2019 at 09:57 PM.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    He said he was tempted to cheat on his girlfriend to be with yasu, the OP and then out of the blue, he blocked her.

    His thought process, the way he thinks, writes, talks and overall behavior are not good.

    No sense contacting him.

  8. #17
    Platinum Member Andrina's Avatar
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    When a guy is in an exclusive relationship and says something to another woman, would he say the same thing to her if his girlfriend/wife was in the room? If the answer is no, he has crossed relationship boundaries.

    I wouldn't spend another second of my emotional energy on someone who doesn't know how to behave properly while in a romantic relationship.

  9. #18
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    OP, Would you be cool if you learned that your bf was doing this? Put yourself in the bf's shoes.

    Maybe, you were planning to hang with the gf, too? That would be okay.

  10. #19
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    Originally Posted by Hollyj
    OP, Would you be cool if you learned that your bf was doing this? Put yourself in the bf's shoes.

    Maybe, you were planning to hang with the gf, too? That would be okay.
    Of course no. I was put in a similar situation in the past and was honnest from the start to both of them about the whole thing and let each one make their own decision.

    I don't think they're still together since *he* contacted me recently. And I don't think I've done anything wrong I backed off the minute I knew about her, and even earlier. And if he have someone in his life I will leave him alone like I'm used to do.

  11. #20
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Just let go. Invest your energy in dating local single guys.
    Originally Posted by yasu
    he has a girlfriend. And he blocked me this week out of the blue from facebook.

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