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Thread: I (22F) jokingly told him (23M) he loves me, and he agreed. Does this mean that

  1. #11
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    I don't think you should feel so bad. Just don't take it so hard when he texts or when he doesn't text. This is a casual relationship/friendship so keep things casual and lighthearted. After you've cleared your head, try keeping things light. If it's not good for you that way or you don't feel good overall or find yourself wanting more out of a friendship/relationship, just recognize that this might not be the best option for you. You both share a history together and you saw each other not long ago. Leave it at that and enjoy it for what it was.

    Stay grounded, get involved with more local hobbies and interests, meet people in your town, get to know and meet new people, allow yourself to get taken out of your head space for a bit and away from this one person. I don't encourage daily texts from this person. Daily texts or calls usually happen in relationships. This type of casual relationship shouldn't demand that much output of energy from you. There's a disjointedness there. Don't forget to enjoy other areas of life and give attention to others in your life.

  2. #12
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    I don’t think he loves you any more than he hates you. He said both in that interaction. I think he was just being playful.

    I don’t think there is anything wrong with having a flirt-mance, as long as you both know that’s what it is. Flirting with someone (even on a daily basis) is not the same as wanting a relationship with them. And if you live very far away, he probs isn’t looking for a long distance thing.

    If you find yourself longing for more, maybe that’s a sign that you need to put yourself out there in the dating world a bit more to find local guys.

    I don’t think you need to stop talking to him as long as you can keep things in perspective. Enjoy it for what it is! A pleasant distraction. But if you do find yourself obsessing.. yeah... you’ll need to do something about that....

  3. #13
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    Was this the guy you flew out to lose your virginity to? Depending on how you answer greatly influences my advice.

  4. #14
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    I didn’t fly out there specifically for the sole reason of losing my virginity to him lol, it was to visit home and we agreed to see each other while I was up there. But yes its the same guy.

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  6. #15
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    You’re right I apologize, it was not specifically to lose your virginity but you did state you engaged in sexual intercourse with the belief that it was completely casual.

    I think it’s safe to say that’s not reality.

    So now you either drive yourself absolutely bonkers interpreting his every blink or you tell him how you feel, while keeping in mind the distance between the two of you.

    It’s a messy situation, no question, but there’s no point to sit in limbo indefinitely having feelings for someone and sitting on edge hoping they feel the same.

    Rip the bandaid off and find out, go from there, this is no longer casual for you emotionally, that’s quite often happens when sex is added to situations, time to untangle the web you two weaved.

    It’s quitw possible he feels the same.

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