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Thread: Man that doesn't watch porn

  1. #1

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    Man that doesn't watch porn

    Im really feeling like i cant find a decent man. Porn and sex chats have seemed to destroy my relationships.. Im just really wondering if the man who can love me the way i need is real. I want to grow my soul with someone who understands how i feel about this.

  2. #2
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    I'm in my late 30's and I've never dated a man who likes porn. As a matter of fact I seem to like it more than they do. Everyone I've ever been with says that videos and pics do nothing for them and they would rather have "the real thing"!!!!

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    I have a decent man and we both watch porn. Regardless of what you think about porn or what your definition of 'decent' is, I think it's usually best to start off on a neutral slate when finding someone new or a potential new partner. You may miss a lot of things in the process of dating and let a lot of good people slip you by if you haven't healed completely from your past. It sounds like you feel betrayed and deeply hurt by a previous relationship. Have you taken some time to process that?

  4. #4
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    Yes there are men out there who do not watch porn, itís all about finding your match.

    There seems to be a slight twinge of baggage, maybe insecurity about the whole thing. You have every right to want to be with a man who does not watch porn just make sure your reasons are not part of a web of well unprocessed emotionsz Are you the jealous type? What is it about porn you donít like? Not that you have to justify not liking porn, if you donít, you donít, what Im saying is, if your reasons are jealousy insecurity etc, the porn issue will just morph into another one... female friends, flirty coworkers etc etc, make sure youíre healthy mentally, emotionally, you will find him a lot easy if you are. Remember dating isnít a need or right, itís not air or water, you can take a break to process if need be.

    Good luck!

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  6. #5
    Gold Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    My husband is a great guy who hasn't watched porn and neither have I. There are plenty of men similar to my husband. You just have to know where to find them. They're not at singles bars. Go where all the high quality men are. They are extremely busy with their fast track such as education, careers, have strong family bonds, wish to share their values with a great lady in their life and they're out there. Whittle down your search.

    My single friends found their husbands by joining lots of groups whether at church, community volunteerism, work related recreational clubs, sports (example: running club), through class or course enrollment, hobby enrichment, friends, acquaintance and family introductions. Sometimes there are mutual people who know both you and him. They've done their homework for you and can tell you what they know about the man before you date him.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Where are you finding these men? What do you mean by "love you the way you need"?
    Originally Posted by Annmary
    Im just really wondering if the man who can love me the way i need is real. I want to grow my soul with someone who understands how i feel about this.

  8. #7
    Gold Member leseine7's Avatar
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    What about just saying upfront that it's a deal breaker for you? You'll get an honest response from a decent guy, and most likely he'd be able to set it aside for the relationship. I am a girl who likes and watches porn occasionally - I am a decent woman, and my husband knows I do this - it does not hinder our marriage or our sex life. However, if he said to me that it was a deal breaker, I'd cut it out completely. There's a difference between enjoying some sexual exploration and having an addiction to it.

  9. #8
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
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    Find a man that has a strong hobby. My old man isn't into porn, he is into cars, and car culture...he spends most of his time watching drag racing, car build videos, and works on his projects. My yard has too many projects but I don't care, it keeps him busy and happy.

  10. #9
    Gold Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    You are not alone, a lot of women don't like their men watching porn, which is looking at other women. It can feel like cheating.

    Many of the guys think that's since it's legal, that means it's okay. But many women don't see it that way.

    All you can do is find a man who does not watch other women or one who will give it up for you. You only need to find one good man.

  11. #10
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    Be sure to add your aversion to men who watchporn in your dating profile(s) so that you want waste your time meeting anyone who's into porn.

    Dating is about screening people out in order to move onto finding a GOOD match rather than trying to change anyone who responds. So make your profile clear enough and be clear enough when you first meet people about your dealbreakers. Then you won't get into the wrong relationships in the first place with people who ARE dealbreakers.

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