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Thread: GF broke up with me

  1. #1

    GF broke up with me

    So me and my ex started dating 6 months ago and we were extremely close. I loved her and she loved me, and I believe we balanced eachother perfectly. So this summer for the last 3 months we have been long distance from each other only seeing one another 1 weekend a month. As she is someone who suffers from anxiety and depression it has been very hard on her and she has been really sad all summer because of our distance and being at home. So 6 days ago I started noticing her behaviour being a little bit distance and sad toward me so I asked her what was wrong. She said that she is thinking of breaking up with me. We are going to be back together in the same city in 1 month, but after that I will be in a new city and only be able to see her on weekends. SHe said that even tho she loves me she is breaking up with me because she is worried that after 4 months she is going to be extremely sad only seeing me on weekends so she wants to get it over with now. I tried to get her to stay but I did not plead or beg too much and respected her decision. I have not contacted her since. She has been posting snap chat stories very often knowing ill see them. The stories are just of her doing mundane things- but she would never post anything before. I want to be with her and make our relationship work but I a, sticking very strictly to the no contact rule. But i dont know what i should do next- give her space- no contact until we are in the same city than ask her to meet up with me- or just text her? What should I do CRY! Help please.

  2. #2
    Gold Member SarahLancaster's Avatar
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    She wants to break up with you, and NOT for the reason she gave you. You don't break up with someone you supposedly love because you would be sad seeing them only on weekends. That's world class BS.

    Let her go. You're going in different directions anyway. Don't beat this dead horse.

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear this. LDRs are very difficult. Where did you meet? At college? Are you both home for the summer? Is that what the distance is about? Leave her alone until you can meet in person, then ask to meet up for coffee if you want. Have you considered that she may be dating locally?
    Originally Posted by humza12345
    -So me and my ex started dating 6 months ago
    -this summer for the last 3 months we have been long distance from each other only seeing one another 1 weekend a month.
    -We are going to be back together in the same city in 1 month

  4. #4
    Platinum Member reinventmyself's Avatar
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    She broke, she'll need to fix it.
    She knows where to find you.

    In the meantime, block her on snap chat so you aren't checking her postings and wondering if it has anything to do with you. It keeps you from moving on.

    Anything other than a yes, is a no.

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  6. #5
    We met in college and I know the type of person she is. She is a big introvert and before we broke up she would call me very often- so i definetely know she would not cheat on me and date locally. One day I forgot to call her before bedtime and she started screaming crying on the phone, really really upset. This whole summer she has been so depressed and shes been saying constantly its long distance. I saw her a few weeks ago and we had a lovely weekend together. I dont know. Im not going to contact her at all until we are in the same city together- and even then I may wait for her to do it first. This hurts a lot, first girl I ever loved. :(

  7. #6
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    This doesn't sound like the most mature person if one forgotten call had her screaming and crying on the phone, OP.

    She needs far more attention than a long-distance relationship can reasonably provide. I would let her stay gone. She isn't cut out for anything that involves distance.

  8. #7
    Platinum Member DancingFool's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by humza12345
    We met in college and I know the type of person she is. She is a big introvert and before we broke up she would call me very often- so i definetely know she would not cheat on me and date locally. One day I forgot to call her before bedtime and she started screaming crying on the phone, really really upset. This whole summer she has been so depressed and shes been saying constantly its long distance. I saw her a few weeks ago and we had a lovely weekend together. I dont know. Im not going to contact her at all until we are in the same city together- and even then I may wait for her to do it first. This hurts a lot, first girl I ever loved. :(
    Sooooo.....nothing about what's in bold strikes you as one screw short of a full stack? No alarm bells going off? Nothing? She might be your first love, but boy have you just dodged a bullet. Delete her number, heal, move on. In the future, maybe think a bit about basic standards and whether yours might be a bit low in some important areas.

  9. #8
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    Long distance is useless, in my experience. Planning, $600 airplane tickets, waiting, and then they get sick on that day specifically, not the day before, not the day after, but on that day. Or their long lost brother comes into town that day, all of a sudden they remembered they need to look for a new job, etc, etc. Keep it within 40 miles max. They stop answering calls or texts, you can get in your car and see them the same day. If they're too busy for that, it's over, keep it moving. Long distance is for the movies, especially today when in dating people are thrown away into the garbage left and right, because there is always someone else around the next profile.
    Zero to marriage already takes 5 years minimum because people don't trust each other, and when you add long distance to the equation, and these all-in once-a-month grand entrance dates will take you 30 years to marry them.

  10. #9
    I understand your frustration. By you waiting for a response from her is a sign of weakness in her eyes. You have to more strategic. I've been in the same situation. I was too nice to her, and very clingy. She decided to take a break from me. When I started hanging with my female friends and ignoring her, all of sudden she started blowing up my phone. I would tell her I'll call you back and hang up on her. You have to understand a women's mindset. Now she's thinking you can't live without her. Let her contact you.


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