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Do I just go for it ?


Guy94uk

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There’s this girl that I’ve known for a couple years. We get a long really well. She went off travelling for a year and contact pretty much distanced itself. Suddenly out of the blue she messages me “hey babe , really missed you, Can I see you when I get back ?” This was sort of out of character for her and so I thought someone’s got her phone or something at a party and winding her up so I replied “Hey hope your having a nice time out there, would be nice to have a catch up when your back”. I received nothing back just a read receipt.

 

Now that she’s back(only just back in the country), I can’t stop thinking about her. I’ve have had a crush on her for a while and I’ve had people say she’s giving me hints before she left from people I’ve dated who got annoyed with it.

 

Should I bite the bullet and ask her to meet and risk looking like a wolly that’s thought a drunken tease was serious or back off?

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There is literally nothing to risk here, only the potential for reward. You know she's back? If so, and assuming that last exchange wasn't an hour ago, just shoot her a text: "Hope the trip was a blast. We should catch up. How's the next week look like for you?"

 

If a meet up happens, great. If she doesn't respond, great. The stakes here are so low as to not even worth analyzing.

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Me personally, I'd back off, at least for now. She could have been drunk, is playing games, or one of her friends sent that to mess with her (cruel enough this does happen). If the contact slowed down, it's definitely weird that she would randomly send that to you. I would have replied with "whoa that's out of the blue!" or something if it were me, because it is and I like getting to the point. I don't have time to play games anymore.

 

If she left you on read, I would leave it at that. If she contacts you again, go from there but don't push it to meet with her right away, try to see what she wants and why she is contacting you. She's obviously thinking of you by contacting you, so see exactly WHAT she is thinking of if she contacts you again.

 

 

The alternative, if you feel inclined to contact her instead, is send her another text and straight up ask "hey I wanted to ask, why did you send that last message to me the other day?". Like I said, get to the point. If she leaves you on read, that's a sign to leave it. Otherwise, you might make something out of it.

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What does “she is only just back” mean? How long has she been back?

 

Personally, I think you should give it 2-3 weeks after she’s back in the country before you ask. If she has been gone a year, all her close friends and family will be scrambling around her to see her, spend time with her, hear her stories, etc.

 

Then, in a couple weeks you can say “Hey! You are back! When can i see you and hear all your stories?”

 

I think you are just hung up on the fact she called you “babe”. Don’t overthink. It’s totally normal to catch up with someone you used to know. Ask her out and take it from there.

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I'm not buying it from the one shot line. Are those exactly her words? And your grammar could be a turn off or a reminder to her about why she distanced herself. I'm being very honest here (some people care about those things more than others).

 

If you're very hot for her I'd go for it in the way Bluecastle mentioned. Otherwise, I wouldn't cover the same ground again. What exactly would you want with her, by the way? Is this someone you see yourself dating especially with her hot/cold nature?

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Wait and see what happens. Sounds like she dialed your number by mistake. Ask her out if you want but keep your expectations in line with who she is.

out of the blue she messages me “hey babe , really missed you, Can I see you when I get back ?”

I replied “Hey hope your having a nice time out there, would be nice to have a catch up when your back”. I received nothing back just a read receipt.

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Either she sent this while drunk or she was so drunk she sent it to the wrong person. And either way, she would be embarrassed and not reply then. But that is that, in the past. However, you like this woman, don't slink around hoping for hints and signs or some magic formula of not contacting. She has been away for awhile so it's an easy and natural thing to contact her to ask to get together to hear about her travels. Then all can be gauged from there.

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