Facebook share
LinkedIn share
Google plus share
Twitter plus share
Give Advice
Ask For Advice
Page 3 of 9 FirstFirst 123456 ... LastLast
Results 21 to 30 of 83

Thread: My old friend and I

  1. #21
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Posts
    50,120
    Originally Posted by Debby39
    I do want to yes but I know that Iím not going to itís just a few messages. Heís also in a relationship. No not permission I wanna just wondering if perhaps someone would come along whoís had a similar experience
    Many people have I am sure. That is why the wedding vows exist -if people were never tempted you wouldn't need to reiterate those vows. I have a kind of celebrity crush on a radio personality and it's fun for me - and no I'm not going to tell my husband because it might hurt his feelings and why? It doesn't affect my marriage or vows -it's just fun to listen to his radio show and his banter and feel a slight tingle. It's normal. Sure you might get someone who cheated on her husband because she wanted to have sex more than her husband and figured cheating was an easy way to take care of needs as well as have that thrill of being naughty (and then likely feel like vomiting but whatever).

    I think you might get validation for "I know how you feel, my husband gained weight after we got married, stopped wanting to have sex, etc - and my neighbor was a body builder and unhappy in his marriage too so ..." How is that going to help you??

  2. #22
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    5,589
    Sat down, told him how bad it was bothering me, tried to find a solution that worked for both of us, considered ending it if we couldn't find a solution.

    Cried, got frustrated, felt bad.

    But I still worked it out with just me and my partner and didn't involve anyone else. Counselling is a huge consideration though..seriously, not just marriage but individual counselling or a combination of both.

    But cheating? Nope, I won't lower myself to that. I have needs, but I can control it and I would prefer to either fix my relationship first or admit its non fixable, end it, then find someone else.

    In that order.

  3. #23
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    5,589
    and then likely feel like vomiting but whatever
    lol...its not funny but it is so true.

    That's why I can't and won't ever cheat. The guilt alone would eat me up and it would be sickening feeling to know what you've done..ack!

    I won't live that way.

  4. #24
    Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Posts
    42
    Can I explain though I donít know what it is about this other guy.

    I canít work him out at all

    He acts not bothered but I can tell he must be for the amount of hours that he speaks to me.

    I donít know why heís wanting to cross the line

  5.  

  6. #25
    Member
    Join Date
    Aug 2014
    Posts
    42
    I do agree with you that is is disgusting and sickening

    But somehow when youíre in it...

    Common sense has gone

  7. #26
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    5,589
    The thing is, we all run into walls with our partner at some point. And heck yes, there are loads of willing people out there or they are nice to look at or whatever.

    But that doesn't mean you do it!

    You find the solution within your own marriage and within yourself....not in someone else out there. Plus the guy you've decided to sext with isn't too great if he's cheating too..ugh.

    Not nice, is it? Shady, low down, immoral.

    If you're unhappy, go to your husband. If he tells you he can only give you x amount of sex, accept that and try to compensate with sex toys, or ahem..your hand.

    If you still feel a burning need for more sex, start discussing divorce.

  8. #27
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    5,589
    Debby, common sense is still there..you're choosing to ignore it...it's self control you've got a problem here with.

    You need more of that.

    This guy is trouble and he's helping destroy your marriage, he's not the good guy.

  9. #28
    Platinum Member smackie9's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2013
    Location
    Surrey BC, Canada
    Posts
    1,102
    Gender
    Female
    Cheating is never a solution. Emotional cheating is just as bad. This guy is bad news and a distraction from common sense. The first step is to cut this guy off completely...he is not your answer he is only exasperating your problem. Secondly, take a good look at what you are about to lose..husband, family security, friends, family, etc. Once that's gone...it's gone. The grass is never greener on the other side. Once you remove yourself from this situation, you will be able to have your emotions and desires in check/under control. Last step is to get yourself into counseling to get your head on straight. Then have an honest talk with your husband, possibly seek out marriage counseling. IMO there is way too much at stake to give up the opportunity the save your marriage.

  10. #29
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Massachusetts
    Posts
    16,719
    Gender
    Female
    Originally Posted by Debby39
    I know that it is wrong. I do also know I need to quit while Iím ahead. Iím probably going to have a discussion with him and tell him itís best if he deletes my number and we quit the texting for a while
    I'm not sure why you feel the need to have a discussion with him, as your loyalty lies with your husband. Either way, my guess is you're not ready to let go, while at the same time denying the consequences of your choices/actions.

    In short, I hope you find your way.

  11. #30
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    5,589
    The grass is never greener on the other side
    Absolutely. At best, it's dead grass spray painted green.

Page 3 of 9 FirstFirst 123456 ... LastLast

Give Advice
Ask For Advice

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •