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Thread: She Loves Calls While I Prefer Texting

  1. #1
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    She Loves Calls While I Prefer Texting

    I've been with a girl for around 8 months and we've been hitting off pretty well. Except unfortunately she hates texting. She always wants to talk over the phone but I really don't like calling and flirting where everybody can hear what we're talking.
    Sometimes she can't hear what I'm saying andd the other way around.
    I can get pretty anxious inside my head over this :/ I'd totally prefer whatsapp or normal texting. I don't mind calling her everyday to wish her Good morning and Good night. And we take a video call every night I love that too. But the fact that she wants me to call before I have breakfast/lunch/dinner, and even when I want to talk about the simplest thing with her, that's the issue.
    How do you think I should face this?

  2. #2
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    tell her how you feel- but with a compromise. so that even though you might be saying something that could potentially cause conflict, you are already met with some solution. so think to yourself; how could you compromise with her? if you like to text, and her call, then perhaps call her every morning/Ďnight and text her throughout the day?

    just talk to her about it, thatís the key thing here. communication.

    another thing I might suggest is Snapchat! She might feel the need to call you because she wants to feel close and intimate with you (a part of her love language basically), so yíall could talk that way, but itís more convenient and on your terms.

    Best of luck :) 🖤

  3. #3
    Platinum Member itsallgrand's Avatar
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    How often do you get to see each other in person and for dates?
    I felt tight in the chest just reading that. Holy suffocation batman. There needs to be time to breathe without the other, and everyone is different on what that means, but personally I'd stop with all the calls after telling her once or twice how you would prefer a different tempo.
    Honestly can you imagine if it got to where you dread hearing from your sweetie?

  4. #4
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    I also wonder how often you are able to see one another, like itsallgrand, I think itís a bit much.

    I would try to tone things down a bit while also trying to meet her half way, call regularly, meet for dates regularly, but allow yourself a peace and stay in your comfort zone.

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  6. #5
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    Originally Posted by nirm2009
    I don't mind calling her everyday to wish her Good morning and Good night. And we take a video call every night I love that too. But the fact that she wants me to call before I have breakfast/lunch/dinner, and even when I want to talk about the simplest thing with her, that's the issue.
    So you already speak on the phone three times a day?

    And she wants to increase that?

    I would find that incredibly tedious and suffocating.

  7. #6
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    Be careful with excessive contact whether phone calls or texting.

    My husband and I dated before the Internet age which was refreshing. We spoke on the phone occasionally but saved all conversations for verbal discussions in person every time we were together. This way, you don't smother each other until you're sick 'n tired of each other! This prevents the relationship from growing stale.

    Beware of burnout for excessive contact. Talk to her in person and tell her you want to keep the relationship fresh by not over doing it with "in your face" relentless communication. Save it for in person and only resort to phone chats and texting for urgent matters or fairly important matters. Phone calls, texting, emails, messages and the like transforms into a ball 'n chain. It becomes burden.

    I agree with others about reaching a compromise. Be fair so no one is saddled with endless contact. Give each other an electronic break because it's healthier.

  8. #7
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    When I read the title my automatic thought was compromise but it seems you already have by calling morning and night and texting in between.

    Btw that is excessive contact as it is.
    She sounds incredibly needy never mind annoying!
    Does she have absolutely no respect for your time?

    Tell her ok you wonít text , but donít call her more. Stick to your already too many calls.

    Is this a long distance thing? Have you ever met her?

  9. #8
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    +1 for waaaaaay too many calls!

    Be thankful she also doesnít want to text? Oh my. Anything more than 1, maybe 2 calls a day is excessive. What do you even talk about all those times?

    In a healthy relationship, you need space to have hobbies and friends and a life outside of each other.

    To me, this all sounds micro-managing and suffocating.

    I agree you should dial back all the contact for the health of the relationship.

  10. #9
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    This is too much, why does she want to be on the phone all the time? I'd tell her you can call her twice a day or so, but you also need time for yourself.

  11. #10
    Gold Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Cherylyn
    Be careful with excessive contact whether phone calls or texting.

    My husband and I dated before the Internet age which was refreshing. We spoke on the phone occasionally but saved all conversations for verbal discussions in person every time we were together. This way, you don't smother each other until you're sick 'n tired of each other! This prevents the relationship from growing stale.

    Beware of burnout for excessive contact. Talk to her in person and tell her you want to keep the relationship fresh by not over doing it with "in your face" relentless communication. Save it for in person and only resort to phone chats and texting for urgent matters or fairly important matters. Phone calls, texting, emails, messages and the like transforms into a ball 'n chain. It becomes burden.

    I agree with others about reaching a compromise. Be fair so no one is saddled with endless contact. Give each other an electronic break because it's healthier.

    - Good post.

    Calling and texting should be primarily to set a date. Save the conversations for the date, you'll have more to talk about

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