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Thread: Girlfriend been out of a job for over a year and does nothing about it

  1. #11
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    How long have you been dating? You're not her parent, you don't live together and you don't support her. What you see is what you get. If you think she's lazy, unmotivated and spends foolishly take note, realize you're incompatible and break up. You can't nag and pester her. It's not your money to spend.

    It's none of your business. Stop trying to fix, change and control her. If she is on social services, lives off parents and buys junk with this benefit that's her business. Do not give her money or treat her. It's that simple. It's her problem, not yours.
    Originally Posted by NothingTo
    I have been out of a job a lot but, I have always found one within a week of leaving one. She is currently on Universal Credit and spends all of it on snacks, drinks and video games for her pc.

  2. #12
    Super Moderator HeartGoesOn's Avatar
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    How is she able to collect benefits while living at home with her parents?

  3. #13
    Platinum Member melancholy123's Avatar
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    It sounds like she is on welfare. Is she able to work? Does she have a disability that prevents her from working? If not, I'd say she is just plain lazy and if her parents let her get away with freeloading and sponging off the government, you arent going to change any of that. If you dont like what she's doing or not doing, it's time to find a new girlfriend who has motivation.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    I think the OP is too young to be bothering himself over (or spending too much of his energy) deliberating on the inactions of anyone else. He should be focused on himself and working towards his own goals - the focus is all off. Even getting upset is a waste of time and energy (once you know it doesn't feel good, start opening yourself up to a better reality away from negative influences). Reorient yourself and be a bit more concerned about your own future. This means living differently from how you have been, opening yourself up to that and inviting new and more positive things and people into your life.

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  6. #15
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by NothingTo
    No, I'm only 20 and she's 19. We both live with our parents.
    This is good news. Iíd leave her to do nothing about it on her own, and let her parents decide how long they want to enable that.

    When nothing changes, nothing changes. Iíd change that for myself and let GF decide whether sheíll want to reach out after she's employed or not. If not, youíll thank yourself for curbing a wasted investment.

  7. #16
    Gold Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    Well, she's young, and she lives with her parents, so who cares? I don't see an issue.

  8. #17
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    ^she doesn't study and she's 20. Time to get her lazy arse in gear ;___;. At least have a job o_O.

  9. #18
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    Well, this sounds typical of someone around that age. Itís ok- thatís her life path and if thatís how she wants to live then let her. If your priories do not align with hers, rethink your stance in the relationship. If think is something you want to keep around- I suggest communicating with her. Why does this matter to you anyways? Ask yourself that. And then talk with her about it.

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