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Thread: What a bugger.

  1. #11
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    Well he did go out with somebody. And said he had a pretty good time.

  2. #12
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    Originally Posted by loyal
    Well he did go out with somebody. And said he had a pretty good time.
    Well, just my personal opinion but I think when one is multi-dating, like this guy, it's in very poor taste that he/she actually announce that they have another date, or as in your case, send ambiguous texts forcing you to wonder about it, and ask.

    Absolutely nothing wrong with mult-dating if that's your thing, but there is no good reason for him to be telling you about his other dates or sending confusing texts, that is just so low imo. A dealbreaker actually. Such a game and a very poor one at that.

    How did you respond when he told you?

  3. #13
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    As I said, this his way of unnerving you, to test you, to be that wonderful a-hole you've been waiting all your life for.

    I saw a meme today: A girl is handed a dozen roses by a guy, except the roses are little red flags instead of roses. She says, "A dozen red flags. I love them!"

    This guy didn't send you this text by mistake, because he admitted that he was out with someone else. If he had, he'd have said he was sorry, or admitted embarrassed. Nope, he did it just to be a jerk.

    Again, no, you're not exclusive, but he also doesn't have to be an a-hole.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by LHGirl
    Again, no, you're not exclusive, but he also doesn't have to be an a-hole.
    Totally.

    The only thing I'll ask, in terms of not immediately writing him off as an a-hole, if whether you two, in your grey zone spelunking, have kind of made talking about dating, the wilds of dating, and so on, a "thing." As in: have you ever, even subtly, referenced that you're seeing other people, open to that, whatever?

    Wouldn't negate his klutziness, but would at least make more along the lines of a dunce move than an a-hole move.

    Regardless, you two are, as you said, adults. A little moment like this is always a good time to check in with whether this is what you want adulthood to look like.

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  6. #15
    Platinum Member Rose Mosse's Avatar
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    Not my idea of funny. Sorry. Poor taste as previously mentioned. Now that you've established he's seeing other people, how do you feel about that? Are you emotionally available yourself or are you biding your time while working a few things out?

  7. #16
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    Originally Posted by bluecastle
    Totally.

    The only thing I'll ask, in terms of not immediately writing him off as an a-hole, if whether you two, in your grey zone spelunking, have kind of made talking about dating, the wilds of dating, and so on, a "thing." As in: have you ever, even subtly, referenced that you're seeing other people, open to that, whatever?

    Wouldn't negate his klutziness, but would at least make more along the lines of a dunce move than an a-hole move.

    Regardless, you two are, as you said, adults. A little moment like this is always a good time to check in with whether this is what you want adulthood to look like.
    We've not talked about dating other people. I think we both just kind of know that things are still in a casual phase.

  8. #17
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    Originally Posted by katrina1980
    Well, just my personal opinion but I think when one is multi-dating, like this guy, it's in very poor taste that he/she actually announce that they have another date, or as in your case, send ambiguous texts forcing you to wonder about it, and ask.

    Absolutely nothing wrong with mult-dating if that's your thing, but there is no good reason for him to be telling you about his other dates or sending confusing texts, that is just so low imo. A dealbreaker actually. Such a game and a very poor one at that.

    How did you respond when he told you?
    I said "well, that's not my favorite message to get"

  9. #18
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Was he at the place when he sent it?
    Originally Posted by loyal
    It was a picture of a seedy restaurant with the phrase "seems like a great place for a first date." I sent him a text that simply said "first date?" He replied with "well, not a date...just hanging out."

  10. #19
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    Was he at the place when he sent it?
    Yes he was.

  11. #20
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    Originally Posted by loyal
    Yes he was.
    So he's on another date (a first date) with another woman and texts you from the restaurant telling you great place for a first date?

    Ok that's just cruel.

    Not sure what mind f*** game he's playing, but I would want no part of that even if we were just casually dating.

    Done. Next.

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