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Thread: Gf mother died wants a break

  1. #11
    Gold Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    If you want to be very kind, you can drop off dinner either homemade or take-out / carry-out, drop it off at your girlfriend's house and leave. Just know the food is there but leave. Instead of ringing her doorbell, you can let her know ahead of time when dinner will be delivered. You can be helpful without being intrusive. You won't barge in. You'll help with discretion in mind.

    When my father passed away, a neighbor brought a casserole which was a godsend. People do this for the bereft or post-funeral, too. People don't want to cook but they'll eventually become hungry.

    Whenever there is birth, death, hardship, upheaval, post-surgery, distress, stress or over the top busyness, I've always brought homemade or take-out / carry-out meals to people. It's so appreciated when one's life is turned upside down. I never linger. It's just a quick drop off and then I leave. I make sure someone is home to receive it. I've left food on their doorstep if I know they're home so I text after I leave their street. That's true love and care. You can love and care from afar.

  2. #12
    Silver Member
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    Her mother died. She is not in a place right now to worry about you. Give her time and space.

  3. #13
    Gold Member LikeWater's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Gary Snyder
    It should pull you guys closer together in a good relationship but she does not love you.
    That's just objectively not the way humans work. Read up on some psychology and stop assuming everyone functions the same in all scenarios, especially when it comes to grief. We all handle that differently.

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