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Is he doing a slow fade or am I impatient?


Aubrey2019

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Aubrey

 

I’ve know this man for months before he asked me out on a date. They dates were amazing and I was too shy to kiss him on the second date. We work in the same building complex. He would come check on me multiple times a day. He then suddenly stopped and started ignoring me. He canceled our 3rd date,but held my hands and promised that everything will be okay. I didn’t get his texts because he kept sending iMessage to my android.

 

He all of a sudden became so busy. However, he came to my office every night and reassured me he was not playing games.

 

He stopped telling me his whereabouts, I didn’t bother to ask.

 

We have no rescheduled date in sight. I haven’t been to our work building in 4 days, I also blocked him from my phone. Today I had a change of heart and reached out to him. He said he had been looking for me, I replied the text and he has not read it and 8 hours has passed.

 

2 weeks ago, the next day after holding my hands and saying we will be fine. I asked him when we will go out, he said that if he didn’t want to see me anymore he’ll tell me to my face. He is middle eastern and very straightforward. We agreed to be straightforward with each other. We are both in our 30’s.

 

The fact that I am concerned enough to type this, hurts me so much. He did a 180 change in less than 24 hours. I asked if I did something wrong.

 

We laughed about everything and anything, now I’m confused.

 

I’m pretty much going to block him and just move on. You either want to be with someone or you don’t. Love should not be this hard.

 

When I was not replying his texts (because I didnt get them). He was accusing me of trying to break his heart bla blabla

 

I dont want to go back to work and then he’ll come back with the excuses. I’m too old for this. He sometimes acts like he does not see me & then shows up right before closing. I want to make it easy for him, since he cant be honest. Instead he decided to throw me into an emotional frenzy and deep confusion. I act like everything is okay, not wanting to seem needy. I respond to his gestures, but I feel like I am constantly at the receiving end of waiting for someone to want me and be serious.

 

I wish I can work it out with him. However I see the sign of he's not that into me. Maybe he wants me to read between the lines and move on. Sigh!!!

 

I have never called him & this is my second time texting. We had been seeing each other every day at work. (We don't work for the same company).

 

I date one person at a time. I dont have the capacity to multitask when it comes to dating. In addition I am very beautiful with a good body & I get a lot of attention at work. He sees other workers come in and out trying to talk to me. I had eyes for him only, now I'm just confused😥.

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Unfortunately he's just not that into you. Get on some quality dating apps with a nice profile and photos and start messaging and meeting men. Keep in mind dating is not exclusive until that is established. People date and meet others until then and you should as well. Try not to obsess or laser focus on anyone in general. Until a mutual interest and exclusive dating has at least been established, relax and recognize a crush vs dating.

I am very beautiful with a good body & I get a lot of attention at work. He sees other workers come in and out trying to talk to me. I had eyes for him only
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We actually did establish exclusive dating. I have been acquainted with him for over a year, and we considered dating in April. It doesn't matter now. With is behavior nothing can work. Playing power games or whatever does not work for me & I'm too old to switch to desperados mode. In my opinion, anyone that makes me post silly questions online and wait by my phone is not worth my time.

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You seem to be very passive in the dating scene but that may be because this man never felt right in the first place. The third date was cancelled and his words and actions don't measure up. You're right that it shouldn't be this hard. I think you fell for the idea of him rather than knowing him at all. You both barely know each other and that's reason enough to move on, considering the amount of trouble it's become.

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I phone will send an I message to an I phone. If the recipient is an android user it will send as a text message.

If the sender chooses to only send I messsges , they will be notified that the message was not sent.

 

This guy is a player. Sorry!

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Thanks. I hope to call him out on this behavior

 

Don't bother.

 

Your silence will say more than "calling him out" ever would.

 

Simply choose to not see or speak with him anymore. Block and delete if you have to.

 

He's not stupid, he'll know why, and franky judging from his actions, won't care.

 

Next.

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He's not that interested, so don't "wait by the phone".

-He canceled our 3rd date

-He all of a sudden became so busy.

-He stopped telling me his whereabouts, I didn’t bother to ask.

-We have no rescheduled date in sight.

anyone that makes me post silly questions online and wait by my phone is not worth my time.

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I date one person at a time. I dont have the capacity to multitask when it comes to dating. In addition I am very beautiful with a good body & I get a lot of attention at work. He sees other workers come in and out trying to talk to me. I had eyes for him only, now I'm just confused😥.

 

Don't be. If he wanted you, there would be no confusion. Seeding doubt and confusion is a great way to keep someone in your back pocket. Let this man fly and raise your standards. He Sounds manipulative and selfish.

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"I date one person at a time. I dont have the capacity to multitask when it comes to dating. In addition I am very beautiful with a good body & I get a lot of attention at work. He sees other workers come in and out trying to talk to me. I had eyes for him only, now I'm just confused😥."

 

LOL re multitask. No need to multitask to date more than one person at a time, totally fine if you choose not to. It's basically irrelevant as far as what you look like - when it comes to dating for a relationship -yes, you might have an edge with respect to initial interest with those people who happen to be more visual but holding that interest, interacting in a way that develops a potentially serious relationship -then your gorgeous face and body are basically a neutral. Now of course many people change their minds during early dating with nothing personal meant to the person they choose to stop dating. Also if your mindset is that you deserve to be responded to because of your physical features that get ogled -the answer is yes -again, you will be responded to more often by those men who are more visual, and they might -or might not be -interested in dating you or in a potentially serious relationship. That mindset might come through in how you interact with people so take care to work on humility despite on how beautiful your face and body are.

 

Oh -and I got tons of attention when I was dating. I wouldn't say I was beautiful -I was kind of girl next door/cute/pretty/slim - nothing glamorous. I attracted some really hot looking guys. Some I was interested in dating, some I wasn't. (once I was into my 20s -before that I was focused more on looks as you seem to be). Some guys chose women who were objectively better looking than me, some did not. Keep all that in mind as you consider what you have to offer when it comes to dating and a potential relationship.

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