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Thread: Rude to ask for a coworker's food?/Rude to refuse?

  1. #11
    Platinum Member itsallgrand's Avatar
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    On the upside, at least they ask. Lol. At my previous workplace, there was so much theft of lunches. One time in the lunchroom a guy literally picked up my co-workers coffee that she had in front of her and took a sip without asking.
    Another time, my co-workers left over birthday cake, which was sealed up to go home with her, had gouges in it from someone eating it with their hand!

    Hope that cheers you up ;)

  2. #12
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    Wow. I've worked in a lot of places and just never seen this/heard about it. Here's how I have seen it work in certain places - people contribute to a communal candy/snack dish, various people keep bowls of fruit/candy/mints on their desks where it's obvious it's open for taking some -at my current job -I'm there once or twice a week - - I contribute candy to the communal candy dish -at least ,I did until they stopped having it!

    My husband has had his leftovers stolen from the fridge more than once.

    I would just keep your food out of sight and if possible if someone wants to meet and you are eating lunch ask if you can meet after lunch. If you're having a snack, put it away until you're done talking. Sorry you are experiencing this!

  3. #13
    Bronze Member BecxyRex's Avatar
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    That is super weird! Iíve actually never experienced someone coming up to me asking if they could have some of my food. Itís a bit off putting for sure, unless itís someone Iím dating. Even then I tend not to ask until Iím offered a bite.

    The furthest Iíve gone at work is send a message in a group chat if someone had an extra piece of gum they could throw my way. Itís actually making me chuckle to think about going up to a coworker and being like ďyo bro your lunch looks legit, can I have some?Ē

    But yeah I agree that you could say that you didnít bring that much to eat and you want it to last you throughout the day and most people would understand. Maybe youíve handed out so much, everyone assumes youíre the go to person for some extra snacks?

  4. #14
    Platinum Member maew's Avatar
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    The asking doesnít happen but the food stealing does... one time I had bought some cheese and crackers for home on my lunch break, put them in the fridge, only to come back at the end of the day and discover they were gone. Iíve had lunches stolen as well. And weíve had food stored for team potlucks stolen from the fridge because people some how think itís a bloody free for all.

    Offices can be such weird places I tell ya!

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  6. #15
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    The food stealing is pretty shocking! Do you think people know it's not supposed to be free and they just don't care? I guess I'm grateful that people are at least asking! I suppose that if I continue to say "yes" then people may start to assume the answer will always be "yes" and they might start taking it without even asking!

    I only encountered one occasion of someone obviously intentionally stealing food at work: I worked retail and pleaded with a coworker to trade shifts with me around the holidays. She generously did, so that I could spend time with family. As a thank-you, I baked her a batch of cookies and left them in her mailbox in the staff-room. Someone went in and ate/took about half of them before she saw them. I noticed the bag around the plate was smushed down, and she hadn't even come back to work yet. I peaked in, and saw that half were gone. Grrr.

    I did find out who took them though, just asking around. He said he saw them and thought they were going to be set out for everyone later, anyway. I accused him of being a thief and he said he wasn't a thief because "I just admitted I took them, why would I admit it if I was a thief?" The logic of some people baffles me. OK, you're an honest thief, you still took something that wasn't yours. And he said "It could have been someone else, though, so I don't know why you're being all mean to me." Ughhhh smh.

  7. #16
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Keep your food out of sight. Put a small dish of cheap candy out as a decoy.
    Last edited by Wiseman2; 07-09-2019 at 03:01 PM.

  8. #17
    Platinum Member SherrySher's Avatar
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    Honestly, you need to get a bit of a backbone and tell these beggars..NO!

    You're right, they're not your friends, you don't need to be giving them your food or snacks and it IS rude for them to be asking or expecting.

    But you will get treated how you allow, and you've shown them that you will bend and give them whatever they ask for.

    You need to start saying, no, and mean it.

    Hey, your cake looks good, can I have some? Um, I was just going to keep this to snack on for the day, okay? So, no.

    Can I have one of your candies? Not really, sorry.

    It might feel crappy the first few times but the message will get across and they'll stop asking.

  9. #18
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    If you have a candy dish on your desk, or a bag of candy you keep fishing your hand in the drawer for, I don't think its bad to ask for one. Asking for a bite of your lunch, however, is odd.

  10. #19
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    Originally Posted by abitbroken
    If you have a candy dish on your desk, or a bag of candy you keep fishing your hand in the drawer for, I don't think its bad to ask for one. Asking for a bite of your lunch, however, is odd.
    Thank you! I feel like I'm the crazy one if people don't agree.

  11. #20
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