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So I have this friend, let's call him Mark. Mark and I have been very good friends for going on 2+ years, and 2 months ago he introduced me to this girl, let's call her Marcie. we talk everything is good exchange numbers, we begin to talk for the next few weeks, this girl is absolutely perfect, Everything I could ever want in a girl immediately I could see we had So much in common, so after a few weeks I developed strong feelings for this girl, I mean she was basically everything I ever wanted and more, I hadn't told Mark yet because I felt guilty picking up one of his friends, because see this is something I used to do alot when I was younger, pick up my friends friends, pathetic, lazy ya know, I just liked the attention. I liked knowing what I could get. so due to my past I felt bad about sort of resorting back to my old habits, but see I kept my distance from this girl, but she was the one that was so persistent with me, and she was perfect so eventually I gave in and we started to talk. so about a 2 weeks ago I decided to confess to mark that I had started talking to Marcie, well it turns out he was talking to her as well, they had been talking for Months, he was devastated. there was a little drama at first, but he got over it, actually the bull this girl put us through Actually made us closer than Ever, I Love this dude. I almost lost him because of this little skank hoe, but maybe it had to happen, anyways. about 3 nights ago, mark got drunk and in his feelings, and he began to express to me that he had actually been attracted to me for quite some time, I didn't know how to respond because I was actually really attracted to Him Before his Transition, He was perfect, he's still perfect. he's just not something I'm Used to. my whole life I've dated women, sure I'll look at guys here and there but I never actually Thought about being in a relationship with man, or even a Transman for that matter. I've been driving myself crazy because of the things he said to me, it was beautiful, he told me everything I've ever wanted to hear, and it all just made sense.. but I just don't think I could be gay forreal, what if we do date for a while, and then I decide I want to date women again? I'm so lost it's making me sick. I love this dude, but I don't wanna break his heart. Any advice is greatly appreciated, just please be respectful.

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So I have this friend, let's call him Mark. Mark and I have been very good friends for going on 2+ years, and 2 months ago he introduced me to this girl, let's call her Marcie. we talk everything is good exchange numbers, we begin to talk for the next few weeks, this girl is absolutely perfect, Everything I could ever want in a girl immediately I could see we had So much in common, so after a few weeks I developed strong feelings for this girl, I mean she was basically everything I ever wanted and more, I hadn't told Mark yet because I felt guilty picking up one of his friends, because see this is something I used to do alot when I was younger, pick up my friends friends, pathetic, lazy ya know, I just liked the attention. I liked knowing what I could get. so due to my past I felt bad about sort of resorting back to my old habits, but see I kept my distance from this girl, but she was the one that was so persistent with me, and she was perfect so eventually I gave in and we started to talk. so about a 2 weeks ago I decided to confess to mark that I had started talking to Marcie, well it turns out he was talking to her as well, they had been talking for Months, he was devastated. there was a little drama at first, but he got over it, actually the bull this girl put us through Actually made us closer than Ever, I Love this dude. I almost lost him because of this little skank hoe, but maybe it had to happen, anyways. about 3 nights ago, mark got drunk and in his feelings, and he began to express to me that he had actually been attracted to me for quite some time, I didn't know how to respond because I was actually really attracted to Him Before his Transition, He was perfect, he's still perfect. he's just not something I'm Used to. my whole life I've dated women, sure I'll look at guys here and there but I never actually Thought about being in a relationship with man, or even a Transman for that matter. I've been driving myself crazy because of the things he said to me, it was beautiful, he told me everything I've ever wanted to hear, and it all just made sense.. but I just don't think I could be gay forreal, what if we do date for a while, and then I decide I want to date women again? I'm so lost it's making me sick. I love this dude, but I don't wanna break his heart. Any advice is greatly appreciated, just please be respectful.

 

My god I love this forum. Everything from giant walls of text to this guy calling a chick a - what was it? - "skank hoe" all because both were to gutless to make a move on her, to him being confused about his sexuality. Priceless.

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Don’t date Mark.

 

It’s always a risk to date a friend because if it doesn’t work out you usually lose the friendship.

 

It sounds like you value Mark’s friendship and you aren’t that attracted to him. It’s a bad gamble.

 

Keep him as a friend. Tell him you are flattered and you care for him very much but that you are attracted to women.

 

If your attraction to women ever changes, try on others first before your risk your friendship with Mark.

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I think you're already risking the chance of losing his friendship because feelings have been expressed already and you are looking at him a different way.

 

He is going to obviously feel rejected if you don't feel the same way.

 

But you need to sort out your feelings once and for all. Why are you holding back on being with him? Are you genuinely not into him or are you confused and worried what others will think? Are you scared to admit you could be bi?

 

Try to take everyone else out of the picture. The world only exists of you and Mark. Would you consider trying to be with him or not?

 

If you're holding back due to not being sure how you feel, you could try and see how it goes. It could be that it's just something you haven't allowed yourself to feel before but that doesn't mean that it's not there.

 

However, if you are 100% put off on the idea and you would feel forced due to not wanting to disappoint him, then don't do it.

 

I hope you can find some answers for yourself.

 

By the way, I'm not sure if this girl is a "skank hoe" as you called her. But it was low down for her to be playing you both at the same time, even more so that you were good friends.

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Well, lone, lesson learnt, right? Even if someone seems "perfect", that doesn't mean they are.

 

Try really getting to know someone before you decide if they are suitable for you.

 

Slow down your feelings when you first meet someone, give it time, people can pretend to be whatever you want them to be at the start, it doesn't mean it's true.

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I personally believe that love sees no gender.

 

HOWEVER, everyone still has their dating preferences, and you specifically have only dated women.

 

A new relationship is generally shaky, scary, and fun all at the same time. But if you are feeling doubts right out the gate, then you might want to listen to that voice. Relationships have a tough enough time struggling in today's society without one of the parties having doubts.

 

On top of all this I agree with the others: Risking a valuable friendship for a romance that you're unsure of, could truly break both of your hearts. That would be tragic indeed.

 

My advice is to tell him you love him as a friend, and will always love him and don't want to lose that. Tell him you will always be there for him and that you hope he understands.

 

I hope it goes well.

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My god I love this forum. Everything from giant walls of text to this guy calling a chick a - what was it? - "skank hoe" all because both were to gutless to make a move on her, to him being confused about his sexuality. Priceless.

 

Definitely all her fault, lol. But hey--at least they got closer by trashing her together! Women are good for something, by god.

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There's definitely alot more to marcie lol she was involved with a few other guys, two of which were Also our friends, that we found out about But that's besides the point lol

 

News flash: "Talking" to someone does not mean that you are exclusive nor does it mean that you are anymore involved than two people who are talking. If you wanted to be with her then you should have asked her out and talked about exclusively dating and keeping good romantic relationship boundaries in place. Talking to more than one guy does not make her any of the things you've called her.

 

As for you: Well you are questioning your sexuality so I agree that you should experiment with someone other than your best friend. If you are actually bi-sexual or homosexual for that matter, then you will discover that if and when you can enjoy it with someone that you have not been bonding with through a friendship with a guy who "told you everything you ever wanted to hear."

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How old are you guys? Just as a heads up, there are a lot of women on these forums and referring to a woman as "skank hoe" just because you both liked her and you both didn't get her is not a good look. Had she actually hooked up with you or Mark? If not then what makes her a skank hoe? She didn't owe you guys anything. Just coz you wanted her doesn't mean she has to be into you too.

 

Regarding Mark, well if you're not gay, you're not gay. You definitely don't have to force it. People don't like it when gay people are told "why can't you just be straight". Vice versa applies. Sexuality is what it is. However if you actually are attracted to him looks and emotionally then can you just look past that it's a guy?

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Definitely all her fault, lol. But hey--at least they got closer by trashing her together! Women are good for something, by god.

 

First I wish to apologise about a statement I made about him being confused about his sexuality. I am still working out how this forum works. I now realise that the front page connects to all the other forums and sub forums. I have no business commenting on posts made in any LGBTQIA forum as a hetero male. It just angers me when a male is quick to put a woman down all because hes frustrated shes not taking his advances the way he wants her to. It angers me how a majority of males troll for really insecure women, sleep with them and then discard them all to make themselves feel better.

 

Now. @Jibralta. I don't see how it's her fault though? She has two males showing her attention but not making any clear specific moves. Shes obviously single and ready for something, she was waiting for one of them to push the button and why wouldn't she? If one of them had the guts to push that button, things would of sorted themselves out in a nice way so it sounds to me like she was doing the smart thing and avoiding unnecessary conflict. It's just that this guy expected her to throw herself at him and she didn't so nuts to him. *shrug.*

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So there was four us all in total that all knew each other, (we don't know about the other guys) we all had the conversation with her about boundaries and if she was taking us serious and all that, we All made moves and had Progress with her, but this post isn't about her, f*** her

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So there was four us all in total that all knew each other, (we don't know about the other guys) we all had the conversation with her about boundaries and if she was taking us serious and all that, we All made moves and had Progress with her, but this post isn't about her, f*** her

 

Ok. I will admit, I am an outsider looking in. No denying that. I didn't fall off the turnip truck yesterday though, if you know what I mean. You can say what ever you want and shes not here to defend herself. I do sense a certain cattiness about you and well, had she warmed to your advances I doubt you would be saying any of this, you know? Anyway. I probably wouldn't of even replied had you not of called her a skank hoe. This is the last time I mention her (if you don't again.)

 

As for your friend, why don't you get really really drunk one night in one of your rooms and just see where things take you? You will find out soon enough if you were meant to be with your friend.

 

Oh and don't listen to anyone who says "don't get with him because it might destroy the friendship" because a) if the friendship falls apart just because of that, it wasn't much of a friendship, and b) if you have strong feelings for him (which I doubt, you are just more curious than anything) the friendship would be ruined anyway.

 

When a woman plays that card, it usually means shes politely telling you shes not interested, trying not to hurt your feelings. I am not sure about you but as a male, the more direct approach works. Try it. If its meant to be, it's meant to be, if not, get over it and move on but don't explode the friendship.

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I appreciate all of your advice, negative or not, and I will take all into consideration, but to those who are upset that I called her a skank hoe, I was just venting, I don't believe All women are skank hoes just this one in particular, so here's the full story so that you guys can understand from my perspective, were I come from "talking" is the early stages of being in a relationship, you "talk" to one person and that one person only, as I stated we all had the talk with this girl and she lied to EVERY one of us, why she decided to talk to group of friends all once idk, but eventually we all ended up hanging out together, were she spent one on one time with each of us, well towards the end of the night she ended up with me, we were making out and there was light touching but nothing was forced, well mark ended up walking in on us and she freaked out, she told him that I was forceful and tried to rape her, which was a lie, mark and I are Both victims of abuse so That's where the drama comes in, like that's not a game, that's not something to joke about it's something we take Very serious, any way that was the night we all found out about each other, this girl manipulated all of us this girl was pure Evil, so again I'm sorry for anyone who was offended but I was just Venting, I don't feel ALL women are skank hoes just this one in particular, she could have ruined my life simply because She got caught up, this post wasn't supposed to be about her but it's fine next time I'll just get Straight to the point, anyway you all have givin me Alot to think about, I appreciate ALL of you, thank you all So much.

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I appreciate all of your advice, negative or not, and I will take all into consideration

 

All good. I think the only time I have been negative towards you though was when you...

 

Called her a skank hoe, I was just venting

 

And I realise that now. Honestly, truth be told, I am guilty of that myself, the same as the next man.

 

I don't believe All women are skank hoes just this one in particular

 

I have to stop you here though. If shes young and single and attractive and flirts around a bit, that doesn't make her a "skank hoe" it means that none of the guys shes flirting with have shown her that they are capable of a real relationship. How does she know they are not just going to use her for sex then later toss her aside? Sounds to me like shes playing it smart?

 

so here's the full story so that you guys can understand from my perspective, were I come from "talking" is the early stages of being in a relationship, you "talk" to one person and that one person only, as I stated we all had the talk with this girl and she lied to EVERY one of us, why she decided to talk to group of friends all once idk, but eventually we all ended up hanging out together, were she spent one on one time with each of us, well towards the end of the night she ended up with me, we were making out and there was light touching but nothing was forced, well mark ended up walking in on us and she freaked out, she told him that I was forceful and tried to rape her, which was a lie, mark and I are Both victims of abuse so That's where the drama comes in, like that's not a game, that's not something to joke about it's something we take Very serious, any way that was the night we all found out about each other, this girl manipulated all of us this girl was pure Evil, so again I'm sorry for anyone who was offended but I was just Venting, I don't feel ALL women are skank hoes just this one in particular, she could have ruined my life simply because She got caught up, this post wasn't supposed to be about her but it's fine next time I'll just get Straight to the point, anyway you all have givin me Alot to think about, I appreciate ALL of you, thank you all So much.

 

Hmm. Well. That was an interesting read. I'm not saying this didn't happen, because I know it does happen but again, really, its your word against - well no ones? because shes not here to defend herself. On the flip side of the coin though, I am not sure if you know this or not but 1 in 3 women are actually forced against there will and never report it. So theirs that.

 

Also please, buddy.. Try to break up your sentences. After a couple of three full stops, hit your enter button and get a new line for a new sentence so my eyes stop crossing.

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All good. I think the only time I have been negative towards you though was when you...

 

 

 

And I realise that now. Honestly, truth be told, I am guilty of that myself, the same as the next man.

 

 

 

I have to stop you here though. If shes young and single and attractive and flirts around a bit, that doesn't make her a "skank hoe" it means that none of the guys shes flirting with have shown her that they are capable of a real relationship. How does she know they are not just going to use her for sex then later toss her aside? Sounds to me like shes playing it smart?

 

 

 

Hmm. Well. That was an interesting read. I'm not saying this didn't happen, because I know it does happen but again, really, its your word against - well no ones? because shes not here to defend herself. On the flip side of the coin though, I am not sure if you know this or not but 1 in 3 women are actually forced against there will and never report it. So theirs that.

 

Also please, buddy.. Try to break up your sentences. After a couple of three full stops, hit your enter button and get a new line for a new sentence so my eyes stop crossing.

 

Lol Where abouts do you come from if you don't mind if I ask? The fact that she lied that you tried to molest her, etc. is pretty wrong with, yes. I don't know where you come from but I come from a Western culture (Australia) but came here as a child from Eastern Europe. In both my countries it is not considered sexual or that you are dating if you are just talking. If she was in fact sending sexual things then yes maybe a bit different. But if she's single and all you guys are single too, nobody is cheating, then still don't get what she did wrong just in that sense. But yeah lying that you assaulted her is really bad.

 

In regards to your male friend. I understand what you were saying is that you are a straight guy. Your friend Mark was originally a woman and you were attracted to him, but then transitioned. So Mark is transgender and WAS a female before. You were attracted to him as female but now you are not sure because you're not gay. Well my advice would be, don't do anything you don't feel like doing. If you're not attracted to guys then no problem. You don't have to pressure yourself just because people on this web site told you to give it a go. I mean fact of the matter is that Mark is now a guy, not a girl. As much as that may suck regarding your attraction but that's just how it is.

 

Also judging by your experience with the girl, it could be wise to date outside of your friendship circle because there's just too much drama lol

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Lol Where abouts do you come from if you don't mind if I ask? The fact that she lied that you tried to molest her, etc. is pretty wrong with, yes. I don't know where you come from but I come from a Western culture (Australia) but came here as a child from Eastern Europe. In both my countries it is not considered sexual or that you are dating if you are just talking. If she was in fact sending sexual things then yes maybe a bit different. But if she's single and all you guys are single too, nobody is cheating, then still don't get what she did wrong just in that sense. But yeah lying that you assaulted her is really bad.

 

In regards to your male friend. I understand what you were saying is that you are a straight guy. Your friend Mark was originally a woman and you were attracted to him, but then transitioned. So Mark is transgender and WAS a female before. You were attracted to him as female but now you are not sure because you're not gay. Well my advice would be, don't do anything you don't feel like doing. If you're not attracted to guys then no problem. You don't have to pressure yourself just because people on this web site told you to give it a go. I mean fact of the matter is that Mark is now a guy, not a girl. As much as that may suck regarding your attraction but that's just how it is.

 

Also judging by your experience with the girl, it could be wise to date outside of your friendship circle because there's just too much drama lol

 

You quoted and are talking to the wrong guy, lovey.

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Now. @Jibralta. I don't see how it's her fault though? She has two males showing her attention but not making any clear specific moves. Shes obviously single and ready for something, she was waiting for one of them to push the button and why wouldn't she? If one of them had the guts to push that button, things would of sorted themselves out in a nice way so it sounds to me like she was doing the smart thing and avoiding unnecessary conflict. It's just that this guy expected her to throw herself at him and she didn't so nuts to him. *shrug.*

 

That was sarcasm ;)

 

I agree with you.

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