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Dating someone who doesn’t like you romantically


Doesnotcare

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So this being my first post to this forum (or any forum in general) I really hope I’m doing it correctly. I don’t wanna spill every detail but I guess it’s the easiest way to explain. So I’m casually “dating” this guy who I really like and who I really care about. We’ve been friends for a bit (almost a year maybe 9/10 months) and I did help him get through some stuff including a serious breakup. A couple months ago he called me saying he really wanted to have feelings for me but he couldn’t. The issue was that the relationship he had gotten out of had essentially taken away his feelings for everyone. Basically he has no “heart-pumpy” feelings anymore. So maybe 2 months ago he came and asked me out on a date saying that he felt something in his heart that he hadn’t for a while. He asked me if I still liked him like that and I said I did and then we agreed on it. 3 days later he calls me up saying he’s still not looking for any sort of relationship. Despite this he’s been saying how much he cares about me and that he’s scared I’ll find someone else for a few months. He still says these things and it really confuses me. Despite that I keep reassuring that I don’t think I’ll be finding anyone else and that I care about him a lot too. Anyways, skip forwards to now and I tell him that I’m afraid he’ll never feel the same way I do about him about me. He tells me that he has no idea if he ever will and it’s a valid fear. Our “relationship” on his part is based on the trust he has for me and not any heart feeling. For me it’s based on both. It just really hurts knowing he might never feel the way I do about him. I understand he’s not ready for the full relationship and stuff but it does hurt me anyways. This entire scenario has got me feeling very selfish and upset with myself and just plain sad. I have no idea what to do. Do I wait longer? Do I settle with this? I really really don’t want to break it of as I know it’ll just be more pain on top what I’m feeling and I really don’t want more. I do care about this guy so much and I just want to be happy with what we have. Any advice?

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