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Thread: Is it ok for a man in his mid 40ís-early 50ís to party?

  1. #41
    Bronze Member Gymgirl71's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Wiseman2
    This isn't "partying" it's alcoholism. The good news is he's an ex and you got out and can delete and block him. Google AlAnon. Educate yourself on problem drinking, binge drinking and alcoholism.

    Itís serious...my dad had this problem which is why I stayed with him-which wasnít very long...itís a downward spiral that I wasnít going to be dragged in..I donít mind drinking now and then..but when it interferes with work itís a problem

  2. #42
    Bronze Member Gymgirl71's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by limichelle
    To answer your question OP

    Itís really up to him. If this is his Norm regardless of how old he is be lucky that you donít have to live it with him.

    Iíll be honest and say itís sad that heís an alcoholic. Itís a disease not easily cured. I watched a neighbor go through this. He battled the bottle every day. My former friends father is an alcoholic, I met my friend when I was 10. Her father worked in construction during the duration I knew her from age 10-27. He would get up at 4:00 am every morning and have downed six beers before noon. Get home and hit the hard liquor until he went to bed.

    He was very funny and friendly drunk. When he was sober he was nasty as could be!

    For my friends 21st birthday he gave her $200 to strictly spend on alcohol.

    The problem was he was high functioning so he was in denial along with her and the rest of the family. Iím sure they knew he was an alcoholic but because he couldnít see it or get help for himself, the family just swept it under the rug. Meanwhile his siblings are dying left and right from the same addiction.

    This guy you know itís nice you donít have to be in a committed relationship with him and be dragged down that dark road. Believe me itís a dark road.
    I know itís a very dark road..my mom dealt with it with my dad. He lost a couple jobs, money, etc..it was chaotic...this guy will show up to work late and laugh about it and not even care..heís going to hit rock bottom and Iím not there to catch him thank god..drinking is fine but work and other responsibilities come first. Heís self medicating to cover up his problems. But in the morning the problem is still there, so you have to keep that up

  3. #43
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    Several people have asked but you haven't answered...if he's all this, why do continue to be involved with him in ANY way?

  4. #44
    Bronze Member Gymgirl71's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    Several people have asked but you haven't answered...if he's all this, why do continue to be involved with him in ANY way?
    i canít answer that

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  6. #45
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    Originally Posted by Gymgirl71
    i canít answer that
    Is there something he "has" on you? Something he's holding over your head or threatening you with?

  7. #46
    Bronze Member Gymgirl71's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by boltnrun
    Is there something he "has" on you? Something he's holding over your head or threatening you with?
    Lol no he isnít

  8. #47
    Platinum Member figureitout23's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Gymgirl71
    Lol no he isnít
    Whatís so funny?

    I donít think obsessing with over an alcoholic Ďexí and rumminating about how many issues Ďheí has while ignoring the blatant fact that a healthy person would have walked away long ago is funny...

  9. #48
    Platinum Member bluecastle's Avatar
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    I agree with FiO.

    Honestly, I don't even think it's particularly healthy for us here to be diagnosing this guy as an alcoholic. Maybe he is, maybe he isn't. We don't have nearly enough information to make that call.

    Best I can tell he's a dude Gym dated for a pretty short time, who was never particularly into being in a relationship with her. Whatever his drinking habitsóbe it alcoholism or aged frat boy stuffóthe obsession and rumination is far more concerning, especially since any post that hints at this is ignored in favor of one that allows for a dig at this guy.

    His habits are his habits. What we are doing in picking them apart and diagnosing them is fueling an addiction and dependency of Gym's.

  10. #49
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    I agree with you bluecastle

    OP never answered why sheís still hung up on him.

    Also we donít know the guy.

    It sounds like resentment is holding you in place OP. Thatís not any healthier.

  11. #50
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    Originally Posted by Gymgirl71
    i canít answer that
    That's not an answer.

    Why haven't you blocked?

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