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Thread: Just found out my dad has dementia

  1. #31
    Platinum Member catfeeder's Avatar
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    What is lifeline, and how expensive is it?

  2. #32
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Fudgie
    If someone were in your shoes, same situation, would you judge them for walking away? I don't think stepping up and paying for them is necessarily you being a "better person". If you believe that, than that means that other people who chose to walk away from abuse are in the wrong. It's a valid option but doing so doesn't make you "right" because you have no moral obligation to someone who has abused you so repeatedly.

    Given the lack of obligation, putting that to bed, what would make you feel the best?

    Also, if he needs nursing care and needs a home but can't pay for one, doesn't the govt place him in one anyway? So why should you be burdened with any of that? Let the govt take him.
    No, I wouldnít judge anyone else.

    My mom said ,Ēit is a waste of my money. He wonít use it. He will lose it, break it whatever.... like he has always done with everything and you will end up paying for no reason. They will also ask you to start paying his other bills . He has been useless since day one, never made a plan never planned for the future. Ripped my dad off, me off and my brother off and now wants to rip you guys off . He has been a parasite his entire life. And tell just tell your aunt what he and his brother did to you and let that sink in for her as she doesnít have her daddy to run to anymore to fluff it over for her . ď

  3. #33
    Platinum Member Fudgie's Avatar
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    I agree that paying this one bill sets a bad precedent. Now it's the lifeline but soon other bills will follow.

    Your dad is poisonous barnacle but your aunt is a big girl and she can scrape him off if she so chooses. If she chooses to stay and be sucked dry, that's her choice. But it doesn't have to be yours or your responsibility.

  4. #34
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
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    You know itís like the thing they can have around their neck and push if they fall . My dad falls multiple times a week . The installation the hospital will pay for the monthly payment is $30 a month which he insists he canít pay for and his sister insists he canít pay for. I can pay for it thatís not the issue the issue is he most likely wonít wear it or lose it .
    Originally Posted by catfeeder
    What is lifeline, and how expensive is it?

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  6. #35
    Forum Supporter ~Seraphim ~'s Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Fudgie
    I agree that paying this one bill sets a bad precedent. Now it's the lifeline but soon other bills will follow.

    Your dad is poisonous barnacle but your aunt is a big girl and she can scrape him off if she so chooses. If she chooses to stay and be sucked dry, that's her choice. But it doesn't have to be yours or your responsibility.
    I agree it is a dangerous precedent . He once asked me for $700 to pay his phone bill that he blamed on my cousin but later found out it was sex phone lines so thank god I didnít pay for it. He asked me and my brother for a kidney when heís the one who is destroyed his whole body and why he ended up with diabetes and renal failure .

    When I told my aunt that we may end up looking out their own child our whole life she said oh well thatís your problem your father should come first . Which I replied to her no,my son will come before my father any day of the week .

  7. #36
    Platinum Member Fudgie's Avatar
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    She's off her rocker. When you're a parent, your kids come first. Period.

    If your aunt feels so strongly, she ought to pay. This is squarely her problem.

  8. #37
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    Well, she left her kids when they were 14 and 16 and buggered off to marry some other guy. My dad and all his siblings left home at 15 . They think this is how child raising works. But your parents now you should pay for them for life. 🙄
    Originally Posted by Fudgie
    She's off her rocker. When you're a parent, your kids come first. Period.

    If your aunt feels so strongly, she ought to pay. This is squarely her problem.

  9. #38
    Platinum Member Fudgie's Avatar
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    Sounds like it's time for him to live with the consequences of an abusive, squandered life while you get to continue to live yours with your loving family, free from burden.

  10. #39
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    My mom said she would inform her of a few choice facts about her wonderful family and tell her to pound the pavement and leave her kids alone. So I think I will give my mom her number.
    Originally Posted by Fudgie
    Sounds like it's time for him to live with the consequences of an abusive, squandered life while you get to continue to live yours with your loving family, free from burden.

  11. #40
    Platinum Member Fudgie's Avatar
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    Sounds like momma bear is going to set her straight. That's so good! Really, I am happy for you.

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