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Thread: Tired of texting

  1. #11
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Response: "we'll talk later, I'll call you after work". Don't be a text-buddy or online psychologist chat. If she is just bored and creating drama and buzz through text pings, that is something to consider.
    Originally Posted by Reality4me
    I I find it to be kind of annoying and honestly a turn off. It takes so much more effort to understand what she is feeling and trying to say.

  2. #12
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    Iím better at expressing self through writing. So I can see why she chooses text, however itís not a good idea. I refrain from text because you canít read someoneís tone through text. Thatís why texting can create a lot of misunderstandings. If she canít communicate with you face to face thereís bigger issues you two need to work on. Communication is a must to keep a good and healthy relationship.

  3. #13
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    Tell her you can't continue in this pattern and that if she has something to discuss she needs to do it in person. If she needs to write it out first, suggest that she writes it in a journal before talking to you about it.

  4. #14
    Platinum Member Cherylyn's Avatar
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    You should address this by telling her the truth. Texting is ok as long as isn't the only form of communication. Have her actually converse verbally with you on the phone or in person as much as possible. If she is so disagreeable about this with you for months, ask yourself if you can continue at this rate?

    It's better to be with someone who is secure and reasonable with texting and considerate enough to have a normal phone or in person conversation with you. It's common sense.

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  6. #15
    Platinum Member Wiseman2's Avatar
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    Consider that she may need a therapist to sort all her problems out with and as suggested above she can journal all her thoughts and go over it with a trained professional who can actually help her with her problems. There are also several online therapy options which she can try. She may be able to find one that suits her budget/insurance, etc. Suggest she do that if online chats are better for her.

  7. #16
    Gold Member leseine7's Avatar
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    Whew. Okay, so the real issue isn't the texting - it's the lack of/ poor communication and her insecurities, and feeling like you aren't compatible. So I will focus only on that part, because that's the bigger deal:

    If you think things aren't working out (which it certainly sounds like), you need to ask her to get together and talk in person. Then you need to tell her you are feeling unsure about your compatibility because of the insecurities she has expressed and the difficulties you two have lining up. Bring up that texting about serious issues is really stressful/ annoying for you and you prefer to discuss them in person. Maybe, if she feels nervous addressing concerns in person/ via telephone, you could suggest that she write you an email with her concerns instead, and then you can respond later on in person when you see each other?

    I agree that discussing serious topics via text is super annoying and often gets tangled and complicated because so much can be read into responses. If she refuses to stick with this later after you've talked this out yet again, she's not respecting your wishes (she already isn't, but I do think this seems to stem from some nervousness on her part and can maybe be talked out in your discussion with her in person).

    Ultimately, if you're just not feeling it, however, you aren't doing her any favors by sticking around and should probably consider ending it.

  8. #17
    Gold Member Gary Snyder's Avatar
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    Well, you started the relationship as friends and text buddies, but now you want it to change?

    Actually, this woman does not sound so bad - she does not talk and smother you with affection? Some women will talk your ear off! Maybe you should take a second look at her. I know what I said could sound silly, but I'm serious!

    A quiet woman?! Some guys would marry her!

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